Alpha Nicholas
Chapter 17 –

Alpha Nicholas

Tonight has been up there with a fucking tornado. From hosting a ball to being forced to meet wanna-be future Lunas to replaceing my mate, all of which I didn't want then to add on being woken out of bed to hear of She-wolves running around our lands at 1 in the morning, And if that wasn't enough, one of those girls just so happened to be my mate and the other my brother's mate.

Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly happy for my brother. I know he's wanted his mate for a long time but what a shit situation for it to happen in, and what are the odds that his mate would be my mate's best friend? Shockingly, that's what! I know there's more to his mate's story and I have a feeling that there's going to be some work to be done to help her, but she's family now and there's nothing we won't do to help her.

My mate and her best friend trying to run off is also the reason that I now replace myself sitting in my office at 2 in the morning with my mate on the other side of my desk looking lost, sad, and afraid. I can only imagine what she's thinking... that I don't feel anything towards her. That I'm not affected by the mate bond, or that I don't feel the tingles but I do, I feel it all.

I also know that she thinks that I don't want her as a mate and of course, while I may have made sure that she thought that to be true, it doesn't mean that I want any harm to come to her, and that's the problem, she has been harmed. She's clearly in pain, I can sense it, can feel it. I'm also an Alpha which means my senses are more heightened than other wolves and I feel even more deeply. She's in pain both mentally and physically and I know that after how I have treated her I don't deserve to know what's going on with her, but it doesn't mean I'm not going to try.

"So your name is Bonnie?" I see her slightly shiver when I say her name and it pleases me even when it shouldn't. "Yes, it is, Alpha Nicholas." I nod while Storm rolls around like a pup in my head loving her name. "How old are you Bonnie?" My gut is telling me she is 18 after something Lily said but surely the Moon Goddess wouldn't give me a mate 10 years younger than me... would she? "I'm 18." Yes, yes she fucking would!

"Now, would you like to tell me your story?" She scrunches up her nose with a look of confusion and I swear it's the cutest fucking sight I have ever seen. Fuck, she's starting to mess with my head, I can feel it. The sooner she goes home the better. I hope Lily doesn't want Bonnie hanging around here because I don't think I could handle it. It's only been a few hours since we met and despite my thoughts, feelings, and even determination not to have a mate I can slowly feel the mate bond drawing me in and it needs to stop. "You felt the efforts from the first moment you laid your eyes on her and you know it! You can lie to yourself but you can't lie to me!" Storm growls rattling my head. The longer we are around her the more angry he's becoming at not having her be ours. Why the fuck did I think it was a good idea to have her stay here with just me in the room? "You wanted to spend time with her. We both did because tomorrow you're going to send her away and destroy her and us because you're a selfish prick!"

I know Storm's right to be pissed but I can't handle it right now not when I have my mate sat right in front of me so I block him out and turn my attention to the girl sitting in front of me. It's then that I notice what she's wearing. She is in leggings and a tee-shirt both of which look old and torn with a baseball cap on that covers half of her face. "Take your hat off." Her eyes meet mine as she slides it off her head and I swear that I stop breathing. Despite all of my feelings, I can't deny that this girl is absolutely beautiful and no doubt the most beautiful girl, that I have ever seen.

"So your story... start talking?" She raises one of her eyebrows and I have to bite back a smile at the flicker of attitude I can see in her eyes. She may be hurt and Goddess only knows what else but she has fire in her. "Are you asking me, or are you telling me, Alpha Nicholas?" To look at her you can see that she physically looks ready to sleep for a month but still, she's trying to hold her own and I can respect that. "Does it matter?" She shrugs her shoulders once again and I watch as her attitude leaves her as quickly as it arrived and I don't know how to feel about it.

"I guess not. I don't mean to be rude but Lily has already told you what happened and why I was there so if you wouldn't mind I would like to head back to my room to rest. It will be a long drive home tomorrow." She stands up but sways a little on her feet causing me to jump up and go to help her only she quickly gets herself under control and starts walking for my door.

"I didn't say you could go." She hasn't told me anything I want to know and it's pissing me off. I also know that I don't deserve to know anything after how I have treated her and that just pisses me off even more. She turns to face me but doesn't say a word. "Is there something else I can help you with, Alpha?" Every time she calls me Alpha it feels like a slap to the face and I'm beyond grateful that I have blocked Storm out because I can only imagine the shit that he would be giving me right now.

"I'm still waiting to hear your story?" I take a step toward her but she instantly moves back. "There is no story." We both know that's bullshit. "You seem to forget that I know when you are lying." I watch her eyes flash as I catch a glimpse of her wolf. She's getting pissed off with me that's for sure. "Ok, well forget about the story then and you can just tell me what happened to you instead. I know you're hurt, I can feel it."

The look of panic that crosses her face is brief but I don't miss it. "I'm fine. I fell over earlier while crying my dress and hurt myself but I'm already heeling. I'll be ok by morning." Another lie. "If it's ok with you I'd like to leave now. Please let me know when you would like to make the rejection official." Her words hit me like a ton of bricks and despite her acting like the words she just said were nothing important I could see the pain in her eyes and I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt to see.

We both remain quiet for several minutes lost in each other but then I watch as her focus snaps back into place and she stands a little taller. "Would you like to do it now?" While my head screams yes, my heart burns begging me to say no. How can I go from never wanting my mate to feeling so torn up at the idea of her leaving? I always assumed that I would meet her and reject her without a care but now that the reality of the situation is staring me right in the face I know that it won't be easy, not one bit. "We will deal with it before you leave." I practically growl the words as I struggle to deal with all that I'm thinking and feeling. she nods her head with a small smile as she turns to open the door. "Please, tell me how you're hurt?" I just can't let it go. She shakes her head no but keeps the smile on her face. As she opens the door she turns back to face me. "I want you to know that I understand. Sometimes it's just not meant to be. I want you to be happy, Alpha Nicholas." Jesus Christ her words hit me like a sledgehammer as I remain rooted to the spot while she walks out of my office and away from me.

How can she say that? How can she be so calm and so nice when I'm being nothing but a coward and a bastard? I slam my door closed not giving a fuck about the time and slump down behind my desk before getting my good whiskey out. I don't even go for a glass, I just take the top off and start drinking. That girl is something else. She is beautiful and she has a heart of gold. And while I don't believe all of Lily's story I do believe what she said about Bonny and after hearing what she's just said to me only confirms the type of person she is.

My whole body feels like it's on fire while my mind goes into overtime and then I drink myself to sleep at my desk. I've not been drunk in over 8 years but right now, I don't care. Both my head and my heart hurt and blacking out from drinking so much is all I need right now.