“No, you don’t know what it’s like.
When nothing feels all right.
You don’t know what it’s like.
To be like me.
To be hurt.
To feel lost.
To be left out in the dark.
To be kicked when you’re down.
To feel like you’ve been pushed around.
To be on the edge of breaking down.
And no one’s there to save you.
No, you don’t know what it’s like.
Welcome to my life”― Simple Plan
I’m in the kitchen, grabbing a couple of apples for school, when I hear Moira blow her car horn. I shake my head, knowing she’s waiting in my driveway. I run over to the front door and open it, looking out. Yup. She’s waiting in her car for me. Moira waves when she sees me.
“I’ll just be a sec,” I yell, hoping she can hear me. I close the door again and race upstairs to my room. I grab my bag and run downstairs, remembering to throw my apples in last minute.
Do you know when you have a feeling in the morning that the day is going to be bad, but you go ahead with your plans anyway? Yeah, today kind of feels like one of those days for me. I remember two years ago, my parents gifted me these most gorgeous dangling earrings for my birthday. I wore them, even though I had that ominous feeling that the day would be bad. And it was. And each time I wore those earrings again, I had a horrible day. I think wearing those earrings on that one fateful day jinxed them. They’re now sitting at the bottom of my jewellery box, never to be worn again.
“Good morning,” Moira grins when I slide into the passenger seat next to her.
“Hi,” I smile back.
“How was your weekend?” Moira asks.
“It was good. I had my birthday, and my parents took me shopping,” I say sincerely.
“Really? Happy birthday. I didn’t get you anything. I’m sorry. What did your parents get you?”
“Uh, a necklace,” I say, fingering it. Moira looks at my direction.
“Oh, that is beautiful; my sister would love that,” Moira states.
“Your sister?”
“Yeah. Luna. She loves everything to do with the moon. It’s her thing.”
“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I state.
“I have many sisters and brothers. I come from a huge family.”
Moira pulls her car into a spot.
“I have to see Luna today, so I won’t be at school,” Moira tells me.
“Oh. Okay. You didn’t have to pick me up, you know.”
“It’s all good. I’ll probably arrive for fifth period, so I’ll see you then,” Moira says. I nod and exit the car, shutting the door behind me.
I take a deep breath in. Time to start the day. I walk into the school grounds and see the usual crowds standing together. Logan and Blake are standing to one side with Yvonne, and the boys smile and wave their hands when they see me. Yvonne just scowls.
I go to the sports department, as I have P.E. first, and head for the changing rooms. We only need to get changed at the beginning of the lesson, but I like it when we have P.E. first off because I can get changed before everyone else.
After my sports shirt and shorts are on, I carefully fold my skirt, blouse, tie and blazer and place them in my bag. Grabbing my bag, I walk over to the tennis courts to wait for the bell to go and for school to start.
I’m lost in my thoughts when my other classmates walk onto the courts. Catherine scowls, and her friends sneer at me, but I ignore them.
The scent of watermelon and lemonade reaches my nose, stronger than ever, and Athena begins to jump up and down in my head.
- What? – I ask her.
- I don’t know… -
I see Zach and his friends walk onto the tennis courts.
- Turn around, turn around – Athena chants in my head. I laugh at her as I watch Zach stop and scan the area. My body stops working when our eyes connect.
- Mate – Athena says sadly. I nod and pull my eyes away. This is not good.
Mr Holding blows his whistle and instructs us to gather around. Reluctantly I get up from where I’m sitting by the fence and walk to where Mr Holding is standing. I keep my distance from Zach and his crowd, looking at my feet while listening to our teacher’s instructions. We’re separated, boys from girls again, with the boys being taken to the field with Mr Holding.
“Okay, girls, we are going to play against partners today. Team up!” She instructs. I watch as everyone chooses who they’re going to buddy with. I’m always either not picked or picked last, so I stand there and watch.
“Sera? Buddy with me?” Tonya asks. I nod. Tonya is also a werewolf, and she’s had her wolf since March, so this might be a fair match with Athena. I’ve paired up with Tonya a couple of times. She’s not one of Catherine’s group, but in terms of ranking, she’s high up there, so I’m surprised she asked me to join her.
We grab our rackets, and Tonya takes a tennis ball, and we replace an open court. We’ve been training to play correctly for weeks, and this is the second lesson where we’re actually playing a game. I take my place on the opposite side of the court and watch as Tonya takes a serve. The ball flies through the air, and Athena comes forward, analysing the trajectory of the ball. Together we move to the right, lifting our arms and hitting the ball squarely with the racket.
“Whoa!” Tonya yells, running in the opposite direction to get to the ball on time. She hits the ball back to me, and Athena and I run to hit it.
- This is fun – Athena links me.
- Yeah – I agree. For once, I’m doing well at sports. With Athena helping me, we move quickly across the court, meeting the ball successfully with our racket.
- And we’re not even trying – Athena gloats as we hit the ball hard, making it soar quickly. Tonya runs for it but narrowly misses, making the ball hit the chain-link fence behind her. She turns to look at it before turning toward me with a grin on her face.
“That was fun, Sera. I want to play against you next time,” she tells me. I smile as she shakes my hand.
“Sure. Another round?” I ask.
“Yup. Your serve.”
We spend the hour playing together, and I’m smiling when we walk back to the changing room. Catherine and her friends are already in the changing room, and I replace a spot furthest away from them to change back into my uniform. I take my time getting dressed and am rewarded by Catherine and her crew of ogres leaving before me.
“See you next time,” Tonya tells me before she leaves.
“Yeah,” I nod as I finish buttoning up my shirt. I don’t have to go so painstakingly slow now and quickly finish putting on my tie and blazer.
I exit the changing rooms and head for my next lesson when I’m pulled to the side by my arm. Tingles erupt from where I’m touched, and I feel nothing but pleasure.
“Mate, come with me,” Zach whispers, pulling me around the corner of the building. I gulp, tears beginning to form in my eyes. Yup. This is it. He’s going to reject me. He doesn’t want me.
“Look, I know you’re my mate, and I….” Zach begins. I just nod as tears start to run down my face. I should have prepared myself for rejection. I should have dreamt scenarios in my head so I could respond properly. But I never thought this far. I hoped my mate wouldn’t be part of the pack and would meet him much later when I was away from this place.
“Hey, hey,” Zach says softly, wiping the tears from my face. “It’s all right. It’s going to be fine. Just… just don’t say anything yet, okay?”
Zach looks at me, but I can’t think of anything to say to respond. I watch as he scans the area behind me.
“Look, meet me at the back paddock after school. We’ll talk then, okay?”
I mutely nod in response.
“Good,” Zach says. He doesn’t say goodbye to me, just leaves me standing there. So he’s not going to reject me, then?
A flicker of hope ignites in my belly.
- Our mate wants us! See! We are worthy of love, Sera! – Athena smiles happily in my head. I nod in agreement.
- We’ve got this – I agree with my wolf.
- We have – she says.
Thanks to Zach, I’m almost late to my next class, and I slide into my seat just in time. I can’t wait for the lesson to end, so I can move on with my day and have my talk with Zach. I can’t believe how wrong I was this morning when I felt like today was going to be bad. I had a good lesson with Tonya, and I learned that my mate is the hottest, most wanted guy in the pack! And he cares for me!
I try to concentrate on whatever my teacher is saying, but it’s difficult because all I can think of is Zach… his light brown hair… big green eyes and perfect mouth. And he’s mine! All mine! I know I shouldn’t be too hopeful, but it couldn’t hurt, right? Oh goddess, I hope that’s not my famous last words. I think it’s okay to hope. It’s okay to believe there is a light in the future, something to look forward to.
I look at the clock on the wall. I may be a wolf, but I wish I could speed up time today. I look down at my book and copy the next three sentences from the board into my book. I look back up at the clock. Two minutes have passed. Frack! I copied a bit more into my book. I look at the clock. Three minutes.
“Ugh!” I groan.
“Everything okay over there?” my teacher asks me.
“Yes sir, sorry sir,” I reply, feeling my cheeks heat up. Today needs to be faster!
Finally, the bell goes, and I shove my things into my bag as quickly as I can. I make my way to an empty lunchroom in record time and take my usual seat.
“Is Moira here today?” Logan asks me when he joins me at the table.
“She said she was going to come later,” I tell him.
“Oh, well, let’s sit elsewhere then,” Yvonne suggests when she hears me. I watch as she and Jaymie look at each other and turn to head in a different direction.
“I’m sitting with Sera,” Blake says as he approaches my table.
“Really? Are you sure?” Jaymie asks, grabbing his arm as he walks past her.
“Yup. You can go somewhere else, but I want to sit with someone who’s actually nice,” Blake tells her, and I can’t help but let the smile I’ve been hiding out.
“Thank you. You didn’t have to,” I tell Blake as he and Logan sit opposite me.
“Of course I did. You’re not as bad as everyone makes out,” Blake tells me.
“Sure I won’t ruin your reputation?” I ask.
“You forget we’ve known you since daycare, Sera. I don’t know what happened between you and Cath, but whatever it was, you don’t deserve how people treat you,” Logan says.
I nod. I don’t know what happened between me and Catherine either. We were best friends; then, when the first day of High School started, she began to snob me. I wasn’t good enough for her. We had spent our whole summer together, and then she turned into a cow the next day. A couple of weeks later, our dads had an argument at work, and the rest, as they say, is history.
“What did you get up to on the weekend?” Blake asks as we eat.
“I turned eighteen, so I spent the weekend with my family,” I tell him.
“Really? Dam. We’ll have to go to the forest next weekend, so our wolves can meet,” Logan suggests. I nod.
“I’d like that,” I tell him.
- Same. They’re nice. Even their wolves, Adam and Ryan, are lovely - Athena links.
Logan and Blake then tell me about the party they went to on the weekend, and I smile as they tell me about all the fun things they got up to. While they talk, I scan the room and see Zach sitting with his friends Cameron and Felix. Zach notices me looking and winks in my direction, making me look away in embarrassment.
The bell goes for class, and we say goodbye.
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