Divorce Anxiety
Chapter 21

Chapter 21 Why Is He Not Good EnoughKathleen was having a fitful sleep when she was awoken bya bitingly cold presence.Her gaze landed on Samuel, who was standing by her bed.She wasovercome with nerves and disbelief that he had actually returned.Samuel regarded the squeamishKathleen in an icily condescending manner. “You're pregnant?”“No. Who told you that? Do you denythe lab test results?” Kathleen bit back as she worried her bottom lip.“Then what is it that you'relooking at?” retorted Samuel as he pointed at the tablet.Kathleen pursed her lips. “I had promised tohelp Gemma out tomorrow by volunteering at a charity home advocating for autistic children. Doyou replace fault in me doing some background research beforehand?"That managed to convinceSamuel.”What time will you be leaving tomorrow?” asked Samuel dispassionately.”l plan to reach byten o'clock."Kathleen secretly heaved a sigh of relief.That was a close call. Her pregnancy was almostrevealed."Are you certain you're not pregnant?” Samuel reiterated.”Of course. When have I skippedmy birth control pills?” deadpanned Kathleen."That trip to the hot springs two months prior.”Samuel could still recall it vividly.Well, that was true indeed.Kathleen had decided to head to the hotsprings on a whim while Samuel had been there on a job inspection. Neither she nor Samuel had aninkling that either party would be present, yet both had met out of sheer coincidence.It had onlytaken Samuel one look at Kathleen, enticingly flushed and bundled up in a bathrobe, for him toravish her completely in his room.In the heat of the moment, Samuel had forgotten to bring alonghis condoms.He rarely used them, as a matter of fact, and relied on Kathleen's regular intake ofmorning-after pills.After their night together, he had urged Kathleen to take her pills on time andhastily left for work.Kathleen was so wrung out after the night's exertions that she failed to act on itimmediately.She had brushed off the reminder since she wasn't ovulating and promptly forgottenall about it.Samuel had worn a condom the subsequent few times they slept together. Hence, shedid not see the need in taking the pills.Yet, a seed had been planted in her womb, and a new lifetook shape.”You weren't around when I was taking my plan B pills the last time,” explained Kathleencoolly. “I'll ingest them right now if you still doubt me!"Kathleen then proceeded to retrieve a box ofmorning-after pills from the drawer.The pill had almost reached Kathleen's lips when Samuelgrabbed her hand, disrupting her. “Fine, I trust you. You haven't been feeling well lately. Takingthese pills might only cause more harm than good.””I hope the future men I meet won't let mesuffer through this, unlike you! All you care about is your own pleasure regardless of myfeelings.”Samuel was incensed.Did I truly act irresponsibly? Still, it is true that Kathleen often has tobe on Plan B pills."Without proper contraceptive measures, would you prefer to be as fecund as asow?” countered Samuel.”If a man were to truly love me, he would certainly have avasectomy.”"Dream on. No man would commit such folly.”"You're so full of yourself that youropinions are skewed. I swear I'll prove it to you by replaceing a good man for myself."“Believe me,Kathleen, when I say that such men are a mere figment of your wishful imagination,” quibbledSamuel.How dare she compare me with her imagined good man. What is so bad about me anyway?Kathleen is given ample money to spend. Besides, her needs and wants, both in bed and in day-to-day life are well taken care of. What more is there to ask for?"The good men out there are a dime adozen. I can't believe my poor luck to have met the only bad egg out there.” Kathleen fumed. Thismeans that we're fated then,” replied Samuel slyly.Kathleen uttered self-mockingly, “As if! Curse myrotten luck. I must have been utterly blinded!"Her mind must have been lust-addled to have pinedafter him for ten years.Samuel huffed in displeasure.Kathleen instantly sensed that something wasoff.Recently, it seemed that she had inexplicably become more prone to losing her temper.Based onher research, however, it could be that her mood swings were due to pregnancy hormonalimbalances.Kathleen pinched the space between her eyebrows, deflated. “Whatever, I'm going tobed."She then proceeded to flop onto the bed, pull up the covers, and fell asleep.Samuelgrimaced.The gall of her to instigate my anger then promptly snooze off like nobody's business. Shewould not have dared to do so in the past. When did she become so gutsy?Kathleen thanked theheavens for her quick wit in switching the birth control pills to vitamins.She wouldn't have proposedto take them right before Samuel otherwise.Kathleen eventually drifted off and succumbed tosleep.Samuel’s glacial gaze was pinned on the bottle of birth-control pills.What an eyesore. Best getrid of it. How am I not a good man?If a good man was defined by his actions in not allowing her toconsume birth-control pills, then so be it.He would use a condom from this day forth.Aftershowering, Samuel lay in bed and turned to his side, taking in the view of Kathleen.She was as softand luscious as fresh peach and slept as soundly as an endearing tabby cat.How is it possible forsuch an irresistibly adorable woman to exist? No wonder everyone seems drawn to her. EspeciallyChristopher. The way he looks at Kathleen does not belong to that of an ordinary friend. The merethought of that did not sit well with Samuel, and he was compelled to wrap Kathleen in his embraceto soothe his unease.”Let go of me you scum!” Kathleen shrieked as she struggled to escape fromhim.Samuel frowned in dismay at the commotion, but Kathleen was merely sleep-talking.”Leave mealone. 1 no longer love you. I'm going to replace someone else whom I deserve,” Kathleen whimperedin her sleep.Samuel felt a twinge in his chest.He couldn't seem to explain why those words madehim so queasy.Yet, there was nothing he could do but bear down on the discomfort.The daydawned bright the following day.Kathleen kicked aside her covers in frustration.My entire body feelsso warm!The room's temperature was ridiculously high, even after factoring in the fact that theheater was still running Kathleen was drenched in sweat and felt as if she were being burnt alivewhen the weight of the covers descended upon her once more.Kathleen was livid. Who is theannoying fellow?She was preparing to kick aside her blanket again when she felt her limbs beingrestrained.Her eyes fluttered open to reveal the close-up of a beautifully handsome face.What in theworld is happening here? When did I fall asleep in the arms of Samuel?A smile tugged on the cornerof Samuel's sensuous lips. “You're awake.”Kathleen disengaged herself from him and scooted to thecorner of the bed, alarmed.Some things never change.She used to instinctively burrow into Samuel'sarms before falling asleep and relished the feel of warming her icy feet on his thighs.Samuel hadbeen tolerant of her quirks and never once objected to them.It turned out old habits were hard tobreak, even today.“Excuse me, don't forget that we're about to get divorced. For propriety’s sake,could you please keep your distance and sleep on the couch instead?"Kathleen would have done soif not for her baby.”Ladies first.” Samuel scoffed."All right then,” said Kathleen with gritted teeth.Thecouch was wide enough for one anyway. As long as she kept to her space, it was unlikely that she'dfall off.Samuel's face was drawn into a rictus.She wouldn't have acquiesced to sleeping on the couchin the past. What has gotten into her?