Just a Bit Captivated (Straight Guys Book 14) -
Just a Bit Captivated: Chapter 12
After some thought, Aiden decided that there wasn’t any point in moping about something he couldn’t change. So, he had a bit of a crush. So what?
Aiden wasn’t a stranger to crushes. His teenage years weren’t so long ago that he’d forgotten all the embarrassing, unsuitable crushes he’d had, starting from his mom’s best friend and ending with his brother’s very hot ex-wife. In hindsight, there was a clear pattern with his worst crushes: he always seemed to gravitate toward the forbidden. Luckily, his crushes had always been fleeting, and he had no reason to think that it would be any different this time.
His thing for Zain wasn’t the end of the world. He just had to wait until it inevitably passed, as all his inappropriate crushes had in the past. Nothing to worry about.
So Aiden was in a pretty good mood when he entered the dining room the next morning.
But his mood took a hit the moment he saw Zain.
He’d thought he was prepared to deal with his silly crush.
He wasn’t.
Even looking at Zain was disorienting, Aiden’s emotions contradictory and confusing.
Zain was seated at the head of the table, mouthwateringly handsome as usual. His black hair looked soft and gorgeous, a striking contrast to the white thobe that hugged his wide shoulders and fit arms. Zain was sipping his tea, his eyes fixed on the paperwork in front of him, his fingers absently stroking his chin.
Aiden still felt the same burning dislike and resentment when he looked at him. This man was still his captor. He was still the same arrogant dick he’d come to hate. Aiden hadn’t suddenly started liking him just because they’d had sex.
He just wanted to kiss him.
The thought—the desire—made him sigh inwardly. For fuck’s sake.
“Good morning!” he said, trying to ignore the horrible butterflies that were fluttering all over his stomach.
The asshole ignored him.
Aiden felt the familiar desire to introduce his fist to Zain’s mouth. Unfortunately, his desire to put his mouth on that mouth was far stronger.
“Back home it’s not very polite not to say anything when people tell you good morning,” Aiden said, walking closer. “Are things different here?”
When Zain finally deigned to look at him, his gaze was unreadable. He looked about as approachable as a stone gargoyle.
Aiden still wanted to kiss him. He wanted to touch him. God, this man was such an unfeeling, problematic mess, but Aiden itched to touch him. He wanted to slide his fingers under Zain’s impeccable white cuff and trace the veins and muscles of his wrist, feel his pulse beat under his thumb. He wanted to feel him up. Badly.
Aiden closed his eyes for a moment, exasperated with himself.
Maybe indulging this stupid crush would cure him of it. Overexposure was a thing, right?
“Are you going to stand there all morning?” Zain said. “Sit down.”
Aiden sat down.
In Zain’s lap.
“Hi,” he said, cradling Zain’s face with his hands and giving him a beaming smile. He knew his smiles annoyed Zain for some reason. The dick seemed to like making everyone miserable, so Aiden was determined not to give him the satisfaction of seeing him scared and sad.
A muscle by Zain’s left eye twitched. “Remove your butt from my lap,” he said, in a suspiciously conversational voice.
Aiden might have been more intimidated if he hadn’t known what this man felt like inside of him. That knowledge was surprisingly emboldening.
“No thanks,” Aiden said. “I’m pretty comfy here.”
Zain attempted to dump him off his lap as he had the previous evening, but Aiden was prepared this time around. He twined his arms around Zain’s shoulders and clung to him like a baby koala, burying his face in Zain’s neck, as he resisted the attempts to dislodge him.
“Let go of me,” Zain finally ground out when he seemed to realize the futility of it.
Aiden pressed his cheek against Zain’s stubbled throat, trying not to breathe deeply. Jesus, how did this dick always smell so good?
“Don’t want to,” he said honestly before lifting his head. When Zain pinned him with an icy glare, Aiden gave him his sweetest smile. “It’s your own fault. You smell too good. Is this your aftershave? That would be weird because you look like you haven’t shaved in days. Your stubble is closer to a beard, which definitely didn’t used to be my thing—I always thought it was lazy, but you rearranged my worldview and apparently now I like it and it’s so ridiculous I want to bitch-slap myself—”
Zain kissed him.
Aiden’s brain short-circuited.
Zain’s mouth. Zain’s mouth was on his mouth. Zain was kissing him—if that even could be called a kiss. It felt more like an assault, aggressive and bruising, almost hateful. Zain crushed his lips, sucking hard and biting them, and then his tongue was practically in Aiden’s throat, as if he was attempting to choke Aiden with it, punish him for making him want him.
It was beyond overwhelming, it shouldn’t have felt good—it was objectively a horrible, selfish kiss, with no care for Aiden’s pleasure—but perversely, that only turned Aiden on. The force of Zain’s lust, the lack of control and finesse he displayed was more arousing than any soft, sensual kisses would have been. He even loved the feeling of helplessness, the punishing grip Zain had on his chin. He wanted to be crushed by this man, wanted to choke on his tongue and on his cock, and swallow every drop of his come, wanted this man to fuck him into unconsciousness, until Aiden was nothing but a vessel for his cock.
Christ, his own thoughts and wants creeped him out, but he couldn’t stop wanting that. Couldn’t stop wanting him. Wanting seemed like such an inadequate word for this all-consuming hunger, the desire to swallow, to devour, to consume.
He moaned in protest when Zain wrenched his mouth away. No!
“More,” Aiden said, kissing Zain’s jaw desperately. “Let’s fuck—please, please. I wanna fuck.” Wanna fuck sounded a lot less embarrassing than saying I want you inside me, which was what he really wanted. God, just thinking about the way Zain had felt inside him, huge and overwhelming, made his hole twitch and squeeze around nothing, eager to experience it again.
A strong hand gripped his chin hard and forced him to look at the other man.
Zain’s pupils were so blown his eyes seemed black as they roamed over Aiden’s face. “You have no shame, do you?”
Aiden kissed him wetly, needily. “What should I be ashamed of?” he said breathlessly. “It’s just sex. I’m not a homophobic dick like you. I can admit that I loved being fucked—being fucked by you.” Slipping his hand between them, he greedily palmed the massive erection tenting Zain’s pants. So thick. “You loved it, too. Your cock doesn’t lie.”
Zain gave him such a cold look Aiden would never have guessed that he was sporting an erection had he not been groping it.
“My cock likes a hole to fuck,” Zain said with deliberate crudeness. “I was horny, and you were easy and there. A convenient wet hole and nothing more.”
Aiden shivered, his crotch aching. Shit, he was discovering new—and rather mortifying—kinks he hadn’t known he had.
“Am I supposed to be offended?” Aiden said, stroking Zain’s erection. “Are you saying you’d stick your cock into just anyone? Should I fetch one of your employees for you?”
Silence was the only response he got.
Aiden smiled, feeling a rush of giddy triumph. Zain wanted him. Him. He might deny it all he wanted, but his body didn’t lie.
The sound of the door opening made his smile freeze.
Turning his head, Aiden saw one of the servants—Damir, if he remembered correctly—standing in the doorway with his mouth open and his eyes confused and wide.
Zain barked out something in Arabic, his voice like a whip.
The servant stepped out of the room so fast it was almost comical. The door closed firmly.
Aiden didn’t move from Zain’s lap.
If anything, he moved closer, grinding his cock against Zain’s. Being interrupted had done nothing to kill his arousal. Zain being commanding and harsh didn’t help, either—it went straight to Aiden’s cock. His cock was weird like that.
“You’re like a cat in heat,” Zain said, watching him through heavy-lidded eyes, his lips twisted in disapproval. But he wasn’t pushing him away. He wasn’t dumping him off his lap.
Aiden moaned, grinding harder against the bulge in Zain’s pants. The friction felt so good, but their clothes were in the way. Off. He wanted them off. Unfortunately, they were in the dining room, and anyone might enter at any moment. As they’d already seen.
“What if he talks?” he gasped out, pushing Zain’s thobe out of the way and fumbling with his pants. It seemed Aiden would have to take the matters into his own hands if he wanted to get off. Zain’s internalized homophobia and stubbornness wouldn’t let him act on his desires, no matter how hard his cock was.
“He won’t,” Zain said flatly. “My staff knows better than to talk about anything they see in my house.”
Aiden fished out Zain’s erection and stroked it greedily while he pulled his own cock out of his sweatpants with his other hand. He pressed their cocks together and wrapped his hand around them, staring in fascination at the contrast between Zain’s darker, bigger cock and his own.
A drop of pre-come appeared at the tip of Zain’s cock, and Aiden used his thumb to spread the silky bead of moisture over Zain’s thick, veiny cock and then his own. Christ, it looked so filthy. It was filthy: both of them fully clothed but for their hard cocks, in the middle of the dining room with the door unlocked, Aiden writhing and rutting against the older man like the aforementioned cat in heat. He wished he were a cat in heat: then he would be leaking and wet and wouldn’t need any lube to sit on Zain’s cock right now, right here, as he wanted to do. God, he wanted to get fucked again. He’d done it only once, but he already craved it: to feel the impossible, delicious stretch as Zain used his hole to get off.
Moaning, Aiden buried his face in Zain’s neck and started jacking them off, wishing they could do more than that, wishing they could fuck for real. If only there was lube here…
Aiden whipped his head to the table and his eyes zeroed in on the bottle of olive oil.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Zain said tersely when Aiden grabbed the bottle.
Aiden smiled dazedly, liberally slicking Zain’s cock with oil, stroking it greedily and marveling at its silky texture and girth. “Giving you a hole to fuck,” he said, pushing his sweatpants and boxers down.
“You can’t be serious,” Zain ground out, watching Aiden reach back and push an oiled finger into his asshole. “We’re in the dining room.”
“That didn’t bother you when you fucked my mouth here the other day,” Aiden said, gasping as he pushed another finger in. Oh, the stretch felt so good.
“I’m not fucking you without a condom.”
“I don’t have any STDs. You got my test results when you bought me, remember? Aren’t you clean too?”
Zain glared at him as Aiden lined up his cock against his asshole. “I am. It’s still unnatural and unhygienic.”
Aiden rolled his eyes with a grin. “You aren’t the one who’ll have to clean jizz out of your asshole, so shut up and enjoy, Your Highness.” And he sank down onto Zain’s erection, his breath hitching as his desire to be filled up was finally satisfied.
“Ohh,” he sighed, laying his head on Zain’s shoulder. He rocked back and forth a little but otherwise remained seated on Zain’s cock.
“Aren’t you going to move?” Zain said by his ear. He was breathing unsteadily, his hands coming to rest on Aiden’s ass.
“It feels good this way too,” Aiden said softly, almost dreamily. “The fullness. It’s delicious. Your cock is thick enough to make me feel good even when it’s not moving. I could sit on your cock all day. Can I sit on your cock all day? You can use me as a cocksleeve. Your personal cockwarmer.” He shivered, the idea going straight to his cock. To just sit there and be a wet hole for Zain to fuck…
“I’ve never seen a bigger slut than you,” Zain said, biting his neck. His hips started moving, fucking up into Aiden’s hole. “You’re a whore for cock.”
“You made me into one.” Aiden moaned, gyrating his hips. “Oh god, don’t stop.”
Zain didn’t stop. Aiden was of little help, but Zain made fucking up into him look effortless. Zain fucked like a machine, steady and relentless. Aiden could only hold onto his wide shoulders and whimper helplessly, rocked up with every thrust of Zain’s cock.
“Be quiet,” Zain gritted out, his features contorted as though in pain. “You’re loud.”
“I can’t—aah—ahh—so good… Why does this feel so good with you—you’re a dick—”
Zain crushed his mouth against his, probably to shut him up, but Aiden didn’t mind. He whimpered into Zain’s mouth, sucking on his tongue greedily as Zain’s cock hammered into him, again and again. God—god—he couldn’t get enough—almost, almost there—
Aiden came so hard tears sprang to his eyes, a sob leaving his throat as he clung to Zain’s firm body with all his strength. His hole squeezed around Zain’s cock, and Zain groaned and spilled into him, his fingers digging hard into Aiden’s buttocks. Having another man’s come in his asshole should probably have felt more weird. Bizarrely, it didn’t.
Panting, Aiden put his head back onto Zain’s shoulder, his arms relaxing their death-grip on Zain’s back and shifting to a tired embrace. God. He felt so good.
“This was awesome,” he murmured into Zain’s neck. His voice sounded drunk. He felt drunk. “You’re such a good fuck.”
Zain made a sound that was a mix of exasperated and disgusted. “Get off my cock.”
Aiden lifted his head and smiled at him, stretching lazily. “Not until you admit that it was awesome.”
Zain gave him the stink eye.
Aiden blew him a kiss and reluctantly got off him, wincing a little as Zain’s cock slipped out. Tugging his boxers and sweatpants up, he carefully sat down in the chair to Zain’s right.
Grabbing a fork, he reached for a sausage and started eating.
It took him a while to notice the weird stare Zain was giving him.
“What?” Aiden said, after he finished chewing.
“Are you really going to sit there and eat with your ass full of my come?”
Aiden’s dick twitched again. He shrugged. “Why not? I’m hungry, and it’s not like anyone will feed me if I miss breakfast.”
Zain’s expression did something complicated: it almost seemed like he was about to smile but stopped.
Aiden blinked and looked back at his food. He didn’t think he could handle it if Zain suddenly started smiling at him. This ridiculous infatuation was bad enough as it was.
He ate in silence for a while, but eventually he couldn’t resist glancing back at Zain.
But Zain wasn’t looking at him anymore.
Aiden wanted his attention back. He tried to fight the feeling, but it was useless: instead of satisfying him, the sex seemed to have made him more desperate for Zain’s attention, not less. God, this was awful.
“I’m full,” Aiden said, pushing his plate away. When that didn’t make Zain look at him, he took a grape and threw it at his face.
“You’re a child,” Zain said without looking at him.
“Not sure what that says about you, then,” Aiden said with a smile, hooking their ankles under the table.
That finally made Zain look at him. There wasn’t a trace of a smile on his face anymore. “Stop this nonsense,” he said.
“What nonsense?” Aiden said, propping his chin on his hand and giving him an innocent look.
“This.” Zain glowered at him, unhooking their ankles. “The touching, the flirting, the—the smiles. It’s irritating. And unwelcome.”
Before Aiden could say anything, the door opened and Gadiel walked in.
Aiden tensed up.
“Hey,” Gadiel said, looking a little uncertain when he met Aiden’s gaze before smiling at him.
Zain said something in Arabic, his tone cold and displeased, even though his face betrayed none of his displeasure. He was irritated. He didn’t like being surprised—at least he didn’t like this surprise.
Aiden wondered if he should be worried that he was so attuned to him.
Gadiel shrugged, brushing a hand through his hair. “I figured since the restaurant didn’t end up being a good idea, I’d come here to get to know Aiden better.” He smiled at Aiden again.
Pursing his lips, Aiden looked at Zain.
Their gazes met and held.
And Aiden made the decision right there. This attraction might have been stupid, inconvenient and infuriating, but maybe, just maybe, he could use it. Maybe.
Aiden let his expression become soft and pleading as he gazed at Zain with his best puppy-dog eyes.
Please, he mouthed at him.
Zain just stared at him, his face unreadable.
“Eh, Zain?” Gadiel said. “I think it’d be better if I get to know Aiden without you around. I think you make him nervous. Come on, Aiden.”
Tearing his gaze from Aiden, Zain looked at his brother. “What do you want with him?”
Gadiel shot him a strange look. “What do you mean? Didn’t you buy him for me? I mean, I still feel weird about it, but what’s done is done, and he’s, like, mine now, right?”
Zain said nothing for a moment.
His heart beating somewhere in his throat, Aiden held his breath.
When Zain looked at him, Aiden gave him another pleading look.
Zain’s lips thinned. He said, looking away from Aiden, “Fine. Go for a walk outside.”
Aiden’s stomach plummeted.
Gadiel frowned. “But—but I thought we’d—”
“Outside,” Zain repeated, his voice steely.
Aiden exhaled. He didn’t want to be alone with Gadiel, but at least being outside the house where people could see them should make Gadiel behave. Hopefully.
He still felt disappointed. He knew it was ridiculous. What did he expect—that Zain would suddenly have a change of heart just because he’d fucked him a couple of times? Right. And maybe pigs would fly.
“Fine,” Aiden said, forcing a smile. “Let’s go.”
He and Gadiel left the house through the back door. Zain could probably watch them through the security cameras—if he cared enough to watch.
“So,” Gadiel said as they walked through the immaculate garden. “Look, I get that it’s not something you chose and you’re angry at being here, but I don’t want you to feel like you’re being coerced to—” He screwed his eyes shut and sighed. “Obviously you are, but we can’t change what Zain did—”
“We can. You could tell him that you refuse to use me and he should let me go home.”
Gadiel made a face. “I wish I could do that, but… I can’t.”
“Why the hell not?” Aiden snapped. He didn’t have much patience for this kid’s woe-is-me attitude.
“I can’t go without sex for a year! It’s been more than a month and I’m going crazy!”
Aiden rolled his eyes. “Use your hand. Plenty of people are still virgins at your age. Lack of a sex life doesn’t kill anyone.” When he was Gadiel’s age, he’d gotten laid twice a year, and it was fine.
“No, you don’t get it—I can’t go that long without sex!”
The desperation in Gadiel’s voice made Aiden give him a longer look.
“I know I have a problem,” Gadiel said, misery written all over his face. “I want sex all the time. Like, all the time. I’m not exaggerating. I know it’s risky and dangerous—I’m not stupid—but I can’t help myself. It’s the only thing that makes me feel—” He cut himself off, pressing his lips together. His shoulders hunched.
Aiden frowned. There was something wrong with this guy. “Have you talked to your brother about it?”
“Zain thinks I’m an irresponsible, stupid fuck-up,” Gadiel said with a humorless chuckle. “Zain would never understand what it’s like not to be able to control yourself. He has iron self-control. He never lets his dick do the thinking.”
Aiden nearly laughed. He wondered what Gadiel would say if he knew that his ass was full of Zain’s come right now.
But it did shed a new light on Zain’s attitude. On top of his internalized homophobia, it probably pissed him off that he had let his cock do the thinking.
“Let me get it straight,” Aiden said. “You think you can’t survive without sex for a year, and because of your overbearing asshole of a brother I’m your only option. You’re so desperate to get your dick wet that you don’t even care anymore how morally wrong it is.”
Gadiel averted his eyes. “It’s not that,” he said in a small voice. “I don’t trust myself. It’s like there’s something in me that wants to get caught, you know? Sometimes I almost want my father to replace out. Maybe death would be better than continuing to live a lie.”
Jesus.
Aiden stared at him, his stomach sinking. Gadiel’s gorgeous eyes looked lifeless. Weary. Utterly defeated.
Oh, fuck it. Lending a hand wouldn’t kill him, right? The guy probably wouldn’t even need much to come.
Quashing his distaste, Aiden said, “Fine.”
“Really?” Gadiel smiled, relief wiping the tension from his neck and shoulders. He really was gorgeous, with his perfect bone structure, beautiful eyes, and full lips.
The prospect of physical intimacy with him shouldn’t have made Aiden’s stomach churn uneasily.
“Really,” Aiden said, turning back toward the house. “Let’s get it over with.”
He walked into the house ahead of Gadiel, trying to steady the panicked beat of his heart. Don’t be ridiculous, he told himself, wiping his sweaty palms against his pants. There was no reason to feel like he was doing something wrong. Absolutely no reason. He would touch Gadiel’s dick, stroke it a few times, and that would be it. Considering the guy’s age and pent-up frustration, it would likely take less than a minute. Then it would be over.
“Where are you going?”
Aiden came to an abrupt halt, blinking at Zain’s tall figure that had seemingly materialized out of nowhere.
“We’re, um,” Gadiel said from behind Aiden. “Aiden agreed to help me out! Isn’t that nice of him?”
Zain didn’t even glance at him, his gaze on Aiden, heavy and suffocating.
Aiden could barely breathe, his heart starting to beat faster, but for an entirely different reason than panic.
“Did he,” Zain said flatly.
Aiden smiled and nodded. “I’m being very cooperative,” he said. “Just as you wanted.”
A muscle jumped by Zain’s temple.
Aiden smiled wider. “Would you like to watch us, to make sure I’m performing my duties well?” he said innocently.
“Eh,” Gadiel said from behind him. “I don’t think—”
“Go home, Gadiel,” Zain said, his dark eyes boring a hole in Aiden.
“What? Why—”
“I said go home,” Zain bit out. “I’ll speak to you later.”
Muttering in Arabic under his breath, Gadiel strode away sulkily.
As his footsteps faded, Aiden gave Zain a serene smile. “What? Why are you looking at me like I did something wrong when I did exactly what you told me to do? Don’t tell me you’re jealous?”
Zain strode forward, grabbed his arm, and yanked him close, pulling their bodies flush against each other.
Aiden utterly despised the way his body immediately went boneless.
“Jealous?” Zain said, glaring at his mouth. “No. I just don’t like someone else playing with my toys.”
“I bet you were a very selfish boy,” Aiden said, wrapping his arms around Zain’s neck and smiling at him. His stomach was full of horrible butterflies again. “Kiss me?”
Zain kissed him.
And everything else faded away.
There was only this horrible man, and this desire thrumming between them, like a living, breathing thing, unstoppable and intoxicating.
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