Last night was just…amazing. I can’t stop smiling. Everything was perfect. The dinner, the sex, it felt like the most wonderful night of my entire life. It feels like my whole world is finally going the way it should be.

I never thought I could have this. I never thought that someone would love me like this. My family has always been somewhat cold and distant. Mother is the one who was the kindest but father discouraged her from forming too much of an attachment.

“Don’t coddle him, Phonipe,”he would say.“He’ll grow up to be weak. We can’t have weak men in our service.”

So Mother had to maintain careful distance. I thought I was destined for the same kind of life. I thought I would end up marrying someone my parents chose for me, in the end, because it was the right thing to do.

Then Layla went and turned everything I thought about myself on its head. She made me fall in love. She opened my eyes up to the idea that I don’t have to go along with my parents’ wishes just because.

She’s everything to me. She’s the love of my life. The woman I want as my mate.

And now she’s back with me, where she belongs in my arms. I have a family with her. I have a son. I would do anything to prove to her just how much I love and care for her. To show her how special she is to me. I haven’t told her the words yet because I don’t want to overwhelm her.

Layla is a very careful, thoughtful person and I know that too much at once would push her away. She would feel like she was being smothered if I rush this. We’ve been through so much, so it’s best to take my time and be careful about things.

If I move too fast, I risk setting off her flight instinct again and I can’t have that. We just had our first proper courting date yesterday. Even before, back at the camps, we didn’t court. Everything we did was in secret, in hiding, behind closed doors. I want to show her off to the world now. I want everyone to know who she belongs to.

But I can’t push her. I’ll just have to content myself with taking things slow. That’s fine with me though, it means I get to spend more time with my son. Jasper is already two and a half and I’ve missed so much of his little life. I don’t want to miss another minute.

I missed seeing him be born, seeing him open his eyes, take his first steps, say his first words…it’s painful to think about and I try not to put too much blame on Layla but I wish she hadn’t excluded me from his life.

That’s why it’s important for me that I take things slow. I don’t want to scare Layla away when we’ve just started repairing this thing between us.

She can take all the time she needs but I’m going to woo her and when the time is right, I’m going to ask her to be my mate.

As I work, I can’t stop thinking about the way she felt in my arms yesterday. It was like no time at all had passed between us. She fit so perfectly and being intimate with her was just as good as I remembered. Except, it was better because I know this time what we have is real.

I’m finishing some paperwork when I hear a tapping at my window. I glance up to see a karasu tapping its beak on the glass. They’re messenger birds that the dark elves use among our race to pass messages back and forth over great distances. The best part about them is that not only are they smart enough to take a message to their target, they can relay information verbally as well, as long as the message isn’t too much for them to recall.

Opening the latch for it, I watch as it hops inside and lands on my desk, holding its leg out for me to take a message from it. “Kerym,” The bird speaks. “This is General Malekhu Shrangimet. I have a message from you, regarding your orders. Please read the attached message and respond right away.”

I open the message and scan it over, my eyebrows climbing my forehead with every line.

This is not the news I was expecting. My hands are shaking by the time I finish.

The General is requesting me to go back to Camp Horizon. They want me back within 24 hours, which means I need to leave as soon as possible, likely on a ship leaving tonight.

Also, my father is asking about me and wants to see me. He’s a high-ranking officer in the service, so it’s not just an idle request. There’s some reason he wants me home. Some specific reason.

My entire body goes numb with the realization that I can’t do this. Ijustfixed things with Layla. I just met my son! I don’t want to be away from them, not yet. But I don’t have any idea where Layla is at in our relationship. It feels way too soon to ask her to go back with me. I don’t even know if she’d be willing.

And I don’t want to ask her to uproot her life here, to uproot Jasper from the only life he’s ever known. Would Jasper even be able to handle it? The idea of taking him away from his friends, from his school…from his world here…it seems so cruel and heartless.

I can’t believe Father is asking about me. That’s not a good omen. What am I going to even tell him about them? Would Layla even be willing to meet them? What about my son? I’m seized by the paralyzing fear that they might outright reject Jasper for being mixed-race. Would it even be safe for them to come with me, to meet my family?

I can’t imagine Layla being willing. Not after the stories I told her about them. She knows that they’re much more small-minded and conservative than I am. Would they even be safe around her? Or would they threaten her to stay away from me? I know my father can be harsh and demanding but would he resort to such tactics if he felt my future was in danger because of my mate and my son?

I can’t put them in danger. I can’t make them face the metaphorical fire just to make myself happy. But keeping this from Layla would destroy the trust we’ve built up. I have to talk to her. I can’t just make a decision on my own. I have to talk to her first.

Steeling my resolve, I stand up, watching the karasu hop around the desk, impatient for me to give it a treat and a reply.

“I’ll be back,” I tell the bird. “You’ll get your treat as soon as I come back.”

The karasu squawks at me, as though giving me the “Well hurry up then” and I take my leave, hurrying down to the docks.

I know Layla is at work today, and Jasper is at school. I’ll have to talk to her quickly about this so we can make a decision together. When I arrive, Iheru is supervising the dock workers and I walk up and tell him that Layla is done for the day and I need her for an errand.

He agrees easily enough. Walking over, I see Layla helping Harper haul in a catch and I call out for her.

“Hey, come with me,” I tell her. “I need to speak to you.”

Layla looks confused but Harper grins, giving her a thumbs up of encouragement and shoos her towards me.

“What’s going on?” she asks, looking over her shoulder to see the overseer nodding that he already knows she’s leaving. “Is it Jasper? Is something going on at the mining camps?”

She looks so worried. I don’t want to stress her out but I’m so nervous myself that I’m sure my expression isn’t helping.

“I need to tell you something,” I say as we head towards the village. “I got a messenger karasu just now, from the General. He wants me back at Camp Horizon within twenty-four hours. And my father is calling for me. He wants me to go back home. I wanted to tell you because I wanted to be honest.”

“Thank you for telling me,” Layla says, grasping my hand. “What are you going to do?”

I take a deep breath. “I want you to come with me,” I tell her. “I want you to come see my family. I want them to meet you. To meet our son. You don’t have to mate with me or marry me but I don’t want to leave without you.”

We stop in a copse of trees, about halfway to Layla’s house. She smooths her thumb over my hand.

“No,” she says, shaking her head. “I can’t go with you, Kerym.”

My heart shatters in my chest. “But…but why?”

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