The Fake Out: An utterly hilarious and totally heart-warming romantic comedy
The Fake Out: Chapter 50

If you and I were socks, we’d make a great pair.

—AMANDA H.

Dreamboat: I bet you smiled when you saw my name pop up on your phone.

Me: That wasn’t a smile. It was a grimace of pain that I had to read that.

Dreamboat: Ah, there she is. You must be feeling better.

Dreamboat: Hey…

Currently, I was in Adult Fiction, where I’d been culling out mis-shelved books. Last night had seemed like some kind of weird fever dream. Had I really curled up on Chris’s lap and cried? By the time I’d got home, I’d been exhausted in all the ways a person could be. I’d taken a hot shower and, for the first time since the pool house, I’d slept hard. But between the Barn Incident and last night, I had no idea where Chris and I stood.

Me: Yes?

Dreamboat: Are we okay?

Me: I think so.

Dreamboat: Good.

Sometimes texting was the absolute worst form of communication. Was that a hey, it’s real good or a eh, good? If texting was supposed to make things less awkward, it was not working.

“Attention. Can I have everyone’s attention, please? Gather ’round.”

I poked my head out from the stacks to replace Iris standing in the middle of the library, arms spread to the ceiling like a prize fighter.

“What’s going on?” I asked, walking to her.

She bounced on her feet. “Where’s Aidan?”

“Right here,” he said, coming from the children’s section.

A huge grin spread across Iris’s face when she saw him. She ran to him, put her hands on his cheeks, and kissed him right on his mouth. When she stepped back, he blinked, looking dazed but not altogether unhappy.

“Hi?” he said.

“We did it.” She pulled a packet of paper from her backpack and presented it like she was a magician and it was her rabbit. “We did it.”

Without waiting for his reply, she waved the paper in the air and ran around in a circle like she was doing a victory lap.

“Okay. Iris, I need to ask you something and I want you to be honest,” I said. “Are you using drugs?”

She stopped directly in front of me. “Not yet.”

“Not funny.”

“Ta-da.” She presented me with the packet.

I took it from her and realized it was the math test she’d taken earlier in the week. “You got a B plus? No way.”

“Yep. It brings my grade up to a very solid C minus and I still have the final to go. That means unless I completely give up, I’ll be able to pass. I can’t believe it. We did it, Aidan.”

Iris and I turned to look at him, but the poor guy hadn’t moved a muscle.

“Hey?” Iris said. “You okay?”

“Um, yeah,” he said, his cheeks pink. “This is great news.”

“The very best.” She giggled—giggled!—then turned to me. “Heard anything from Dad?”

I shook my head and lied straight to her face. “Sorry. Nothing.”

With a sigh, she stuffed her test in her backpack. “You’ll keep trying?”

“I promise,” I said, and resisted the urge to cross my fingers and hide them behind my back.

“Well, I have to run. Stuff to do.” She took off for the door and then stopped, turned back and rushed to Aidan. When she got to him, she threw her arms around him. “Thank you. I can’t believe I passed that test.”

“No problem,” Aidan squeaked out, his arms pinned to his sides. He cleared his throat. “See you tomorrow for tutoring?”

With a nod, she released him and headed to the exit.

“Be home by midnight,” I called to her back.

“Yeah, yeah.” And then she was gone.

“Hurricane Iris.” I shook my head. “You okay over there?”

Aidan blinked and jolted out of his Iris-induced trance. “I think so?”

“Have you asked her about prom yet?” I said as I headed to my office.

Aidan followed and faceplanted on the circulation desk. “I almost did and then chickened out.”

I grabbed two water bottles and set one next to him. “Looks like you might need to cool down a little.”

Straightening, he grimaced. “That was weird. She was weird. She did kiss me, right? I don’t think I’ve ever seen her smile when it wasn’t after she made fun of me.”

I walked around the desk and slung an arm around his shoulders. “You must understand. The love language of the Sampson sisters is sarcasm. If she hated you, it would be ‘please this’ and ‘thank you that.’ She insults because she loves. Just ask her out.”

The look on his face was part miserable, part hopeful as he wandered away.

“I brought you a chocolate croissant.” Ali dropped a bag from my favorite bakery in town on the reference desk.

I picked up the bag and took a whiff of the world’s best pastry. “You only bring me chocolate croissants when something is wrong.”

Pressing her lips together, Ali nodded. “That’s because something is wrong.”

I stood and pulled my phone from my pocket, my heart thumping. “What? Is it Mama? Iris? I don’t have any missed calls.”

Ali plopped in a chair and threw her feet up on a table. “Nah, nothing like that.”

Slowly, she tore off a bite of her croissant and stuffed it in her mouth. Closing her eyes, she chewed slowly, a blissed-out smile making an appearance.

“Ali!”

She opened one eye. “Alright. Alright. I was just enjoying this last minute of peace before you freak out.”

“I am not going to freak out.”

“You’re freaking out right now and you don’t even know what the news is.”

I rounded my desk and smacked her feet off the table. “Just tell me. I won’t freak out. I swear.”

Ali rolled her eyes, but she set her croissant down and dusted off her hands. “You’re totally going to freak out.”

“Ali!”

She pulled out her phone, tapped around on it, and handed it to me. “This was released earlier today. Maybe have a seat.”

On the screen, a video was playing with a person clearly hiding their identity. I immediately understood this was the anonymous source. Above his head in large letters, it read ANONYMOUS SOURCE HINTS CHRIS STERNS AND HIS FIANCÉE AREN’T ALL THAT THEY SEEM.

I sat with a huff and turned the volume up on the phone.

“…aren’t exactly on the up-and-up,” the man was saying in his altered voice. An engagement photo of Chris and me flashed on the screen.

“Can you tell us more about that?” a voice off-screen asked.

Anonymous squirmed in his seat, the rat. “I don’t want to say too much except that I don’t think there’ll be a wedding.”

“And why is that?” the interviewer asked.

“I have a feeling they’ll be breaking up very soon.”

The interviewer gasped. “Does this have to do with the woman in the video?”

“No, it doesn’t. It’s something else entirely.” Anonymous faced the camera and even though it was impossible to tell because of all the security measures, it seemed like he was talking directly to me. “I’m saying Chris Sterns is not the guy the world thinks he is.”

I tossed the phone on the table with a thunk, anger churning in my stomach. “What a bunch of crap. None of that is true. None of it.”

Except it was true.

Ali took another bite of her croissant. “So, everything’s okay with you two?”

“Yes. W-we’re in love and we’re getting married.”

“Excellent. Because I have a plan.”

I groaned.

“No, this is a good one. I might be able to figure out who this anonymous source is. If we replace out his name, isn’t there legal action that can be taken?”

I had no idea, but replaceing out who it was would go a long way to making this all stop for Chris.

“I could help,” said a voice behind us.

I jumped and put a hand on my chest. “Aidan, I need to put a bell on you.”

Ali stood. “What do you mean, you could help?”

Aidan didn’t quite meet anyone’s eyes. “I’m pretty good at that kind of stuff.”

“How good?” Ali stuffed the rest of her croissant in her mouth and waited.

“Good enough to know how to replace him without anyone knowing what I’m doing.”

“Wait. Is this illegal?”

Aidan winced. “Only if you get caught.”

“Did you get caught?”

He nodded, clearly annoyed. “They only caught me the last time because I got careless. Even though I kept reporting how the basketball team was cheating on all their tests. Over and over, and no one did anything. So, I maybe found a way into the school server and changed their grades.”

Ali nodded, looking proud. “So, you used your powers for good?”

“Yeah, that defense didn’t work on the judge either.”

“Was it worth it?” I asked.

Aidan tugged at his shirt collar. “I don’t know. I like it better here in Two Harts, and I met you and”—he blushed—“Iris.”

My heart squeezed and I had the brief but strong desire to hug him. But I thought that might embarrass him more than he already was.

“This is awesome,” Ali crowed. Leave it to her to break up a touching moment.

“No!” I glared at my best friend. “I can’t let him do this. He could get in big trouble. And this time he might get more than community service hours.”

“Oh, you beautiful, strong, rainbow-colored lady water buffalo.” She nudged my shoulder. “What’s the rule?”

“Ali…”

“We don’t ask, and we don’t tell.” She grinned at Aidan. “Get to work, kid.”