The White Wolf (Book One)
Chapter 30. No Mending what has been broken.

Isla POV

It has been a month since I've spoken to Clayton avoiding him at all costs by sleeping across Crassus’s room and I had moved my things to the room opposite as well although Clayton has made many attempts to speak to me but I avoid him because I cant face him now, possibly ever. I see him and I turn away, I see the pain in his eyes every time I do so, but I cant do this, I have dealt with so much already.

when he tries to speak to me directly I ignore him and he has even tried to stop me before and I just stare at him with no expression, I blocked him from my phone as well like a petty child and I know it is petty but I need peace and time to process so I will speak to him when I am ready.

I threw myself into work and left early in the mornings and went to be late in the evenings, eating my meals in the Library by my desk.

Working on the ceremony and monument my team and I decided on a Large Greek Bouleuterion, It is a open plan hall held up with Pillars, on the Pillars will be metal plaques with the names of those we have lost and dates symbolizing their birth to death dates and as a theme we all decided we will have a sunflower festival within the Hall every year and the hall will be Called the ‘Romano Souls’ in honor of those that parted our pack, we also decided that their Title and rank will also be placed on the Plaque as to keep record, like a family tree.

The Construction started a week after I found out about Clayton's deception and I found myself staring into nothingness on a regular basis running over the scene I saw, his memory of that night, I spent those 'nothingness' hours trying desperately to figure out why? why he did it? and why didn't he tell me?

I think I would've handled things a little better if he had just told me, I was his mate and I would've tried to understand but he kept the information from me on purpose and I think I know why but I didn't want to understand why, I was too furious to allow myself to start processing the betrayal, I wanted to work towards forgiving him but at the same time I didn't, I was never this stubborn but by the Gods I was enraged, children are not toys and belongings you can trade or swap out when you want or need to.

I was still deep within thought when the door burst open with a distraught man full of white paint. ” Luna, I apologize for the sudden entry but I messed up” he breathed and I looked at him and laughed , he looked so foolish with all the white paint covering almost every inch of his body, I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt and I hadn't laughed so long and hard in a long time.

“What happened to you?” I questioned during my fits of laughter.

“Luna I was painting the Roof of the Great hall and I had about 30kg of paint with me and I slipped and paint fell with me off of the scaffolding, I drenched your flower garden and brick path, Its a solid mess” He answered,

” Hurry and fetch paint remover before it dries and sets. QUICKLY ! , Next time do that first before coming to me” I squealed with laughter.

I knew there would be snags here and there but I trust no one wanted to mess up something this important to all of us, Plus he looked petrified of me, I could sense his innocence and he didn't seem like the type to sabotage, It was something I acquired lately the sense of a Good and Bad traits and so I could tell by looking in someones eyes what type of person they were.

This happened after I had seen the memory vision of Clayton's and I think more of my Spirit power is starting to awaken within me, after my fit of laughter I refocused and placed my head back into my proposal for the council, I had an Idea came to me as my memory came to me while I stood naked in front of the mirror within My bathroom last night the steam evaporating from my pale skin and my blond/white hair and green eyes seemed to make me look perfect but when I came to the Romano pack I looked like a war victim because of the Rogues and their perverted ways.

My Proposal to the Council would be that we no longer declare delinquents Rogues and instead they are to be placed in a prison just Like humans and serve terms as humans do for their crimes so by declaring a supernatural as a rogue they become angered and create their own small packs and this spreads hatred between them ultimately they cause trouble for all packs and destroy anything they get their hands on.

They are out of control and need to be governed and I believed this was the best way.

I finished my Proposal and sat back in my chair looking at the clock to see it was Midnight so I stacked the papers and placed them in a large envelope on my desk, standing up slowly as my body hurt from being seated for too long I walked silently to Clayton's Office and quietly I slid the paperwork under his Office door to avoid contact with him.

I wanted him to read it and send it for me to the Council, We were both in charge of the pack so I didn't want to send a document without his knowledge.

We pay taxes and rates towards the council for their services and I believe that all Supernatural beings are to contribute to this Maximum security prison as this is applicable to us all.

I walked absentmindedly towards the Romano Souls Hall and stared at it in awe because It was Large and Beautiful and I was so proud because It was almost complete and in 2 Months we would have our celebration.

I felt his eyes on me that mad me aware of the feeling of my desire for him to be close to me, Amera the weak bitch has already forgiven him but I have not. I needed more time and I felt his sadness through or link because I blocked him out, I turned quietly and I walked towards the Lake leaving him to stare at me from his office window.

I needed to speak with my Mother in Law, I needed her guidance.

When I got there I spent the night crying, I was exhausted and tired and I wasn't feeling like myself anymore and I vomit due to stresses and overworking everyday.

I missed him and I wanted him and I couldn't stand him all at the same time, all she did was hold me close, She understood as she had gone through the same with Clayton's father.

"I was the blessed white wolf and I was blessed with a beautiful child, but he would be taken from me, blessed with a Man that loves me and is my Sexual pleasure pot, But he Betrayed me, I am blessed with gifts , gifts I have no Idea as to their Limits and my strengths" I cried to her, warm tears streaming down my face like a fountain, she remained silent and held me close, silently humming a lullaby to me, strangely it was very calming, I found myself crying a little less with every new verse she hummed.

I was so emotional and I had cried, so hard. I felt stupid for crying because my emotions were getting away from me and I looked through snot filled nostrils and puffy eyes at the Moon and begged silently that the Goddess Nyx to please help me because I needed to heal and move on.

Clayton's mother held me and fed me like a child with biscuits and tea and she had a strange smile on her face the whole time, I didn't like it. She was supposed to give me guidance but she sat for two hours grinning like a mad woman and humming me a lullaby to me while I cried my heart out to her.

"Why are you smiling at me? Im having a damn breakdown” I hiccuped between sentences.

" Congratulations my Sweet” She smiled brightly and motioned to my stomach.

A Pang of shock hit me solidly.

"Oh! Nonononono..." I blurted.

"Even your scent has changed, I noticed it when you walked in, I am also dead sure that Clayton has noticed it as well." She smiled brightly

"Not a baby. Not Now!" I whispered in fear.