Awakening (2 book series)
Awakening – Rejected Mate Chapter 37

It's as he says. After I blacked out there was a moment of pause, where he stopped, pulled my face to him from the cushions and looked over me, aware I was no longer responding. His voice laced in concern, asking if I was okay and trying to rouse me. Genuinely afraid he hurt me or pushed me too far and that maybe he had stopped me from being able to get air. He turned me over carefully, checked my breathing, leaned in, and tried to stroke my face to wake me, saying my name softly.

It's like I stopped and became vacant and there were long seconds of nothing from me. He released his hold on me, panic rising inside of him, afraid he had done something to me, checked my pulse, stroked my face again and tried to shake me, whispering my name softly. He didn't do anything more to hurt me, just bring me round. When it looked like he started moving to pull me up to sit, so drenched in his concern, I completely exploded, transforming in a blink, like he woke the dormant beast. My wolf form seemed to combust from thin air, my eyes snapped open, burning red with the rage of Lucifer and then all hell broke loose. Just like he said it did. I was in it for his blood. Relentless, and I don't recognize myself in the memory.

I cringe as the pictures and images show me wounding him in ways an average wolf would never have healed from. I was on him, after him, rolling around as he tried to battle me off, without actually trying to hurt me. Bit him, clawed him, savagely ripped at him, over, and over. I wouldn't relent, and he was right. His power was no match for mine. He had to heal as fast as I inflicted savagery, just to stay breathing and I was a tornado of hatred who was not willing to stop. Delivering a thundering blow, eliciting a yelp from him, so high pitched it hurts even in memory, my ears wincing at the sound.

My claws imbedding in his chest, an inch from his heart, which I guess is where I was aiming before my wolf gave up. Unable to stay in form when it's still so new for me and takes so much stamina, I slumped onto the floor, all ability zapped out as I transformed back to girl, passing out in a careless huddle.

Colton crawled from under me, sliding his torn body, yanking my talons from his chest, bleeding out and groaning as he struggled to the wall to turn and save himself. Where I awoke to replace him, back as a man, recovering. That's where my memory rejoins what I woke up to.

I have no words, and when he lets me go and sits back on his haunches, I can feel the relief swarming my way that he knows I can't deny what I saw. We can't twist the memories or alter them; he didn't lie to me at all. I saw for myself that what he said was true, I can't deny it in any way. I sit in stunned silence and let it sink in, so hyper aware of his presence, sensitive, but emotionally all over the place and unsure how to feel.

"Imagine what you could do when you harness it and are trained to fight." His words are hushed, his hand coming up to touch my cheek gently and I flinch away from him. Still on high alert, and wary, but also submerged in shame at what I saw myself do. I didn't recognize that wolf as any connection to me. She was feral and relentless, and insanely wild. This is why they never allow us to turn if we can't control ourselves.

"I could have killed you. I tried to kill you." It's uttered in broken shame, my voice shaking and raspy as it all filters through. Steeped in feelings of severe guilt. I can't look at him, but he leans in, sliding his hand under my face softly, tilts my chin up and meets my eyes with his, a smile on that handsome face that shows no anger at what I did.

"The fates wouldn't give me a mate I can't handle. Besides, if I died, you would have too, and we could have been together in the afterlife to carry on without all this drama." That cheeky smirk hits his face, mixed with relief that I'm finally calming down, and a little too cocky that he's winning me over. I can't help the tiny ghost of a smile that twinges on my own lips, a little annoyed that he always seems to be able to draw me out like this. I have no words, and I as go to say something more, his face falls and that serious tone kicks in, cutting into our conversation hastily.

"All wolves have been called to the great hall, immediately" He drops his hand from my jaw and jumps to his feet, all naked glory of him and I avert my eyes, suddenly aware of this fact and instantly shy. He has your typical alpha package going on and it's not exactly easy not to look at. Generally, the males have something to be proud of and Colton is no exception. My face reddens, heat rising up my cheeks, and I huddle myself up, still recovering from this shitstorm we just put ourselves through and now blushing to my core because I ogled him completely starkers and realized he's well endowed.

I wait for him to leave, hoping to pull myself together with a little headspace and try not to also check out his ass, but he pauses when he sees I make no effort to follow.

"That means you too.... my goal's to have you initiated into this pack, Lorey. No matter what it takes. My father can't keep denying us if you're accepted. We need to have a plan.... steps to being together. I don't want to keep going through the emptiness of the last weeks and denying this between us. What I said in the forest; I was wrong." He shrugs as if he's reciting some bland nothing of speeches and not literally altering everything I thought was happening in the last weeks of agonizing life.

My eyes dart to him, shocked, yet not. Deep down I guess I knew this was his motive and his feelings on where we should end up. I'm just not so sure anymore. The words I said in anger still ring true and my heart is telling me that a bond should be stronger than his father's command. Can't shift that disappointment in him, because I feel like he was too quick to give me up.

I'm a whirlwind of emotions and so much has happened in the last twelve hours that I need some time to let my brain catch up. I've been through trauma, changes, a whirlwind, and I need to process it all. I can't tell which way is up, and I'm no longer in control of a single tiny thing in my own life. Not even where I'll sleep tonight, let alone live tomorrow.

"Come. Please. You can't say here in this mess, and we need to get you some clothes." He stretches his hand to me extending his palm outwards and I brush it away.

"Why can't you let me leave to figure this out of my own. This is the last place on earth I want to be." Tears begin to fall as self-pity hits hard and I guess it's because I'm physically and mentally exhausted too. This is not how I thought my life would go and from the day I turned, it's been hell and heartache all rolled into one.

He exhales heavily, frustrated with me, and yanks me to my feet with a forceful lunge at my arms instead. Pulling me up despite my refusal. Taking charge and not in the mood for arguments.

"Listen to me. I need you to comply for a little while and we'll figure this out, together. I don't want you to go. When this settles I'll go to the orphanage and pack up all your stuff, and we can talk out where we go from there; but right now, I need you to come with me and do as I say." He has that edge to his voice I usually hear when he's leading his pack around. It's the don't argue with me, commanding tone, of Prince. Santo.