Beauty and -
Beauty and 77
Chapter 77 – Asher
I had been on my way back to my office to do some additional work, just the usual for me of an evening. I hadn’t been paying attention to where I was going as I was reading an article on my phone, and it was only when I felt the impact to my chest that I realized Bailey was there. The second I realized she was falling, I quickly went into action, and leaped forward, grabbing her and pulling her to me, my heart pounding in desperate fear filling me that she was going to fall all the way down the stairs.
But, thankfully, I had her in my arms, as I lowered myself onto the top step, Bailey still in my arms, both of us trembling. Her eyes had been clenched shut, but she slowly pried them open, looking at me with what could only be described as a look of horror and embarrassment.
She jumped back, as if my touch was repulsive to her. And I had to say I was a little hurt by that, but tried hard to ignore it. “Are you okay?” I asked her, trying to check her over. As she quickly. moved herself from my embrace, to sit herself next to me. How do I seem to replace myself in these messes?
She nodded. “Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” I noticed a loose strand of her hair falling over her face, and I don’ t know why, but I found myself reaching out to gently brush it back, but I saw her eyes widen at me as I did. Did I do the wrong thing? Should I not have touched her? Was she hurt? Now I was more worried she might be hurt. Yet her big brown eyes look up at me, and I swear my heart pounds harder in my chest as she looks at me, not saying a thing.
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“I think I may have been pre-occupied too.” I told her, not wanting her to take all the blame. Then as I looked at her, I saw tears leaking from her eyes. Had she been crying before? Or was it through what had happened? I am sure I had stopped her falling, so she shouldn’t have hurt herself badly. I am sure of that…
She shrugged, going to stand up, but I reached for her hand without even thinking, wanting to check she was okay. “Bailey, you look like you have been crying, is everything okay?” I asked softly. “Did you hurt yourself when I stopped you falling? Are you hurt?” questions seemed to blurt from my mouth. Making me sound like a blathering fool right now, but I was desperate to know if she was okay…
As she lowered herself back down to sit down alongside me on the top step, she shook her head. “I am fine. Beta Asher. Really, I am.”
I had to say I was missing all of Zion’s sly comments right now, because no doubt he would have plenty to say right now. But, since he had left me earlier today, he had yet to return, and as much as I had said I would be glad of the peace, his absence was beginning to bother me…
Though, Bailey’s lack of information bothered me too. She didn’t seem fine. There was a wobble in her voice, but I don’t know if that was simply because she was shaken from nearly falling down the stairs. That would make sense. But, would that make her cry? I am not so sure that it would.
“Bailey, I know I have not made the best first impression, and I doubt I ever will. I am not the best with people. But, please, Eden is desperate for me to make sure you are okay…” I paused,
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contemplating if I should be honest here or not. “And, In truth, I want to make sure you are okay too. Me, not Eden. Me. I know there are somethings you are not sharing with us…” I faltered slightly, unsure how to word what I wanted to say, while Bailey looked at me, a little confused, a little scared. Could I blame her? No… because in truth I think they were a safe estimate of how I feel right now, and little rarely scared me.
I ran my hands through my hair in frustration, realizing she was expecting me to continue what I was saying. “Eurgh… I am even worse with words. Look, I realize some things are private, so you may not want to share them. But am worried about you. Maybe I have no right to be. But I am. You look like you have been crying… or want to cry. And that bothers me. Look, you can tell me to mind my own business, and in truth, I probably would if I were you, but, is there anything I can help with?” My words feel jumbled as they blurt from my mouth…
I sit, my breathing rapid as I am feeling like a total idiot at the words I have just blurted out as Bailey looks at me, completely lost…
Then, she suddenly sighed, a sigh that sounded like it came from her feet. It was so deep. But, she shook her head. “Beta Asher, honestly, it isn’t even worth talking about.”
“Is any shit that makes you feel crappy?” I said, and she looked at me in surprise. “And, didn’t I say to call me Asher?” I reminded her.
She shrugged in response to my words. “Fine, Asher.” And I have to say, I am surprised just how good my name sounds from her lips… it sounds pretty good… but she continued. “Like I said, it isn’t even worth talking about. Or worrying you about. Let
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me say it is just me feeling sad over something that was never even mine.” She said quietly, before looking down at her feet, a blush of embarrassment crossing her face.
“You missing the guy who met his fated mate I guess?” I asked, and at my words I saw the pain across her face. I know my guess was likely right.. “I don’t think there would be any shame in that. Especially if you guys were close. It is like losing someone, right? Losing a link that was there, and now it feels like it is lost?” I suggested how I saw it, though it pains me to admit, I hate the thought of her being close to another guy…
Bailey shrugged, and suddenly, out of nowhere, Zion is back. After being absent all afternoon and evening, he is back, pacing within my mind, so on edge, and he is whimpering, like he can sense her pain and he doesn’t like it. Not one little bit. Like he did not like to see her struggling. What is going on with my wolf today? I only prayed he did not get any louder, or she would be hearing him and I had no clue how I could explain that…
“I sound like I feel sorry for myself, but I don’t. I just have the occasional moment where things get on top of me, I guess. I can say without doubt, I would never have wanted to be with Miles. He treated me so badly before and after he rejected me. I had a lucky escape. But, I can’t help but wonder if my own fated mate didn’t want me, and the guy I turned to and trusted enough to consider as a chosen mate isn’t there for me now, if I am forever going to be alone.” she whispered, and her words are so quiet they are barely audible, but because I am sitting next to her, I can hear her, and I can feel the pain within her voice.
I saw a tear slide down her face. It sounded like she had been through too much, far too young. But, I know this pain she is
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talking of. Because I have felt the same pain in the years since Isla died. A pain that eats away at you. One that makes you wonder if you can cope. The fear of forever being alone…
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