His Blue Moon Princess
Chapter 32

As predicted by Tonia, I had quite a fever that day. Seems like the little dip in the sea didn't turn out well for me... I slept until the next morning, only waking up a few times to take medicine and eat. More than being sick, I was concerned about Damian not

contacting me.

I did act as if I was rejecting him, but that wasn't my intention! I was just scared, that's all. I thought about it all night when I didn't sleep. When morning came, I was well rested and totally awake. Bobo had slept in my room, back to usual, but I was waiting for Tonia. When I heard her knock and enter, I was almost on the edge of the bed.

"Hi, baby girl! How are you feeling?"

"Much better! I think I'm healed. Tonia, what about Damian?"

"Easy, girl, I don't think you're totally fine yet. Let me check your temperature first. Did you forget about your slow-healing thing?"

Is she eluding my questions right now? She sits next to me on the bed and puts a hand on my forehead, but I avoid her.

"Tonia!"

"Looks like you're okay... And yes, he called me last night. He wanted to know how you were. I said you were resting, and that's it. I have to give him update this morning."

"Is he angry?"

"Angry? Of course not, Nora, he's just worried. Now, are you going to tell me what happened yesterday? Without the unnecessary details, please."

She has her big sister tone, but that's not necessary. I need to talk to someone about this, and Tonia is the only one I can confide into here. Plus, she is a woman, and older than me, too. I don't know how much she will understand me, but I don't want to keep this bottled up. I sigh and start talking while nervously playing with my hair.

"Yesterday, Damian comforted me. We started kissing, and... we got a bit passionate. I liked it, but when Damian started touching me, I... I couldn't... I got really scared. I felt like I couldn't stand him touching me like that."

She listens to me with a frown, looking deeply intrigued. After a while, she hesitates a few seconds, then asks me a question on her own. "Nora, have you ever been... intimate with someone?"

I bite my lip. The only one who knows is Liam, and he doesn't seem like he told his brothers... How do I explain this? I barely avoided Alec being killed yesterday, and now this.

"Not willingly. But I... This guy, Marcus Sickels, he... touched me several times back when I was still with the Jade Moon Clan. Just before Alec tried to... to kill me, Marcus almost...."

"... Raped you." She whispers to finish my sentence.

I nod.

"Damian knows. He felt through our bond that someone had tried to force me, and I told him about that guy. But now, sometimes, when Damian touches me, I... I can't help but remember it. I don't want to feel like this when I'm with Damian!" "It's okay, Nora. I think you're experiencing some form of PTSD. It's not your fault, baby girl."

PTSD? Isn't that about traumatism? It might be... But how do I get out of it? I don't want to feel like running away every time Damian touches me! Gosh, I hate this.

I get up, and head to my wardrobe, looking for something to put on.

"What are you doing, Nora? Come back to your bed!"

"No, I'm done resting. Let's go to the gym."

"Punching sandbags won't solve this! What you need is some time, Nora, and talking to the Boss."

I turn to face her, annoyed. "What do I tell him, Tonia? Sorry, some douchebag touched me before you did, so now you can't touch me because I'm traumatized? I hate this!"

She rolls her eyes. I know I'm stubborn, but I don't see anything better to do! I need to blow off some steam. But Tonia gets up and takes the workout clothes from me with a resolute look. She throws them on the floor and crosses her arms. "Enough, Nora. I wasn't talking about speaking to him about your... issue. More like getting to know him, and letting him know you better. The two of you might be close because of your bond, but you barely know each other! I say you need to talk to the Boss, get to know him for real. Maybe this way you will learn to trust him, and that will help you overcome your fear."

She has a point... The attraction I feel to Damian from the start is probably mainly our bond's work, but what else is there? All I know of him is what I heard from others. I don't know his hobbies, his tastes, his habits, nothing. How can I even describe our relationship, then? And Damian, too, seems to know things I don't, but... when do we ever really interact? He is often busy and only calls me from time to time to inquire how I am.

It's not enough. I want him, but I want all of him. Tonia's probably right. If I get to know Damian better, I will probably be able to overcome my fear, and trust him, won't I?

"Bobo says you should have him take you on a date. Isn't it your birthday tomorrow? Ask him then."

I almost forgot about my birthday! Do I really want to celebrate it? After what I learned from Alec yesterday, I didn't think about such things, but now it seems a bit unreal. Is it even my real birth date? Dad probably knew... I hesitate a bit, biting my lip. It might be an idea. I look at Bobo, sitting next to my bed. Sometimes I wish he would take human form and talk to me.

"You really think so?"

The brown wolf nods. I sigh and turn to Tonia. "Okay... Can I borrow your phone?"

After a few minutes, Damian finally answers the call. "Nora. How are you?"

Thank Moon Goddess, he doesn't sound angry or anything. Is he really over what happened yesterday? Gosh, I feel so awkward now...

"I'm fine. I feel much better. Damian, I... I'm sorry about yesterday."

I hear him sighing softly. "It's okay. I figured out what happened afterward. It's not the first time. I'm the one who should apologize, I got carried away."

"No! No, Damian, it's... it's just me."

It's my fault because I'm damaged. I'm scared, way too scared. And I still don't know how to overcome it, even for you. I run my fingers through my hair, fidgeting.

"I just need a bit of time. I'm still... shy."

Shy, really? It's the understatement of the year! I'm literally terrified by the idea of a man touching me, yet that's all I can tell him? How pathetic, Nora. I need to get stronger. Didn't I promise myself to leave my past behind me? How will I if I let myself be restrained by such things? I need to work on it.

I need to tell him the truth, to Damian at least.

"...Nora?"

"I'm still scared, Damian. I still think about what happened whenever someone touches me. I swear I don't want to, but it just... I don't know how to handle it for now."

A long silence follows. What is he thinking? Does he regret having such a complicated mate? Or will he search for Marcus once again? Alec only implied he had died, but that's still an unsolved issue for now. When are we going to replace the truth? I did stab him, but what happened afterward? If he died, what about his body? I'm still feeling uneasy about this. And it's hindering my relation with Damian.

"I told you, it's okay."

"But what if... It takes a long time for me to get better? I'm scared." "Scared of what?"

Scared you might not want me anymore at some point. It's already a miracle for him to be interested in me! I'm not pretty, or a powerful wolf. Compared to Damian, to his brothers, I'm utterly insignificant. And yet here I am, making him wait for me. I hate it, I wish things were different.

"Nora, don't cry."

I wonder how he knows. I'm tearing up a little bit. If only all these nightmares with my parents, Alec, the Jade Moon Clan, Marcus, all this, never happened... It would be so much easier. I could have lived a completely different life, where I might actually be deserving of Damian's affection. I wipe my tears away.

"I'm okay. Damian, can we see each other?"

"I can come tonight. After work."

"No, I meant... like a... An actual date."

I'm red, definitely red. I wish I could hide somewhere. I stepped away from Tonia and Bobo, but I definitely feel their eyes on me still.

"....You want me to take you on a date?"

"If you're busy, it's okay, I just... It was just an idea, I..."

"Okay. Where do you want to go?"

Oh Moon Goddess, he agreed! I feel like jumping around the room right now, but I have to control myself a bit. I'm still blushing, though. Where do I want to go? I have no idea, I've never been on a date!

"I... I don't know."

"You want us to celebrate your birthday together? I can take a day off. What do you usually do then?"

For my birthday? Nothing unusual. Back at the Jade Moon Clan, nobody ever bothered to celebrate it for ten years, or even remember which day it was. I would do my chores, like always, and the 3rd of December would pass like any other day. It was a bit different when I was young, though. My parents always celebrated my birthday with a cake and a nice dinner. But I can't just ask for a cake from Damian... Can I?

"Nora, tell me."

"An Opera Cake."

"What?"

"I... I wanted to eat an Opera Cake..." I whisper, blushing.

I hear him chuckling at the end of the line. It's embarrassing enough!

"Okay, my Love, an Opera Cake. What else?"

Oh my Goddess, did he just call me...? Can I get any redder than I am now?! So embarrassing! I'm blushing so much my cheeks are on fire. What was that?! And Tonia and Bobo are both watching, I must be looking crazy right now! I'm sure Bobo heard that, too. I need to answer, Damian is waiting at the other end of the line.

"I... I don't know. Anything's fine..." I mumble.

"Okay. Let me know if you think of anything else. I need to hang up, I have a meeting."

"I'm sorry, are you going to be late?"

"Neal's glaring at me, and about twenty executives are staring, too, so I suppose I already am."

Oh, Moon Goddess... I stutter a "bye" and hang up as quickly as I can. This is so embarrassing, I could die... His staff heard me requesting a date! And this stupid Opera Cake. too! How could I be so shameless?! I'm never, never, never asking for anything over the phone again, this is way too dangerous! I turn around and see Tonia laughing.

"This is not funny!"

"Oh, hell yeah, it is. Moon Goddess, you are so cute, Nora!"

"I'm not cute, I'm embarrassed to death!"

"It's okay, Nora. You got yourself a date for tomorrow, girl! And for the whole day, too!"

"So you did hear everything!"

"Of course I did. Now we need to decide on what you're going to wear tomorrow, so let's go shopping!"

What shopping? The wardrobes are already full! I argue with Tonia for a long time before she finally agrees to not take me shopping. Instead, she insists to help me choose my outfit for tomorrow and have me rest for the rest of the day. But the thing is, I have no idea what we are going to do...

I finally replace a minute where Tonia is too focused on dress details to watch me and step out of my bedroom. Bobo follows me discreetly, too. I go to the main room to lie on the sofa, and he comes to sit next to me.

I'm happy about going on a date for my birthday, but I can't stop thinking about Alec. Did Nathaniel take him to have his mental health examined, as he said? I hope he didn't lie about that.... Thinking about Nathaniel makes me remember something. I was about to get up, but Tonia enters the room carrying three different pairs of earrings in her hands.

"Which one do you like most?"

"I don't know, the silver one? Anyway, Tonia, I have a question for you. Who is Nathaniel's Beta?"

"Nathaniel's... It's Isaac Graves. He was their father's Beta's son. Why do you ask?"

I thought the creamy white wolf might have been his Beta, but seems like I'm wrong.

"I was just curious... You remember when you guys came to get me at the Jade Moon Clan?"

"Excuse me, you mean when we saved you from being killed by that good-for-nothing after you and Liam sneaked out? Yes, I do remember."

When is she ever going to forgive me about that? I ignore her remark and keep going. "There was a white wolf with Nathaniel that day, and she came with us afterward. I just wondered if she was his Beta."

Tonia looks a bit surprised, and exchanges a look with Bobo, frowning.

"I'm not really supposed to talk about that, Nora..."

"Why? Is it something you can't tell me?" I ask, intrigued.

"It's not about you. She's... part of Nathaniel's private life. I think they just happened to be together that day, and that's why she came along."

Oh. I think I get it. It sure explains her smell in his car... but I thought Nathaniel doesn't have a mate? From Tonia's embarrassed look and her words, I suspect she might not be an "official" relationship... Why would she be interested in me, then? "So, she's not part of the Clan?"

"No, neither Velvet Moon or Blood Moon's. She's from a different pack, I don't know which. Bobo neither. I don't even know her name, and I've only seen that girl a couple of times."

Great, so the only person who actually knows about her is Nathaniel, to whom she doesn't want me to talk to....