I Shouldn't Love Him
I Shouldn’t Love Him – Chapter 23

Xavier’s POV

It’s been a while since I finished my work, and yet I’m not leaving

my office… I don’t really want to.

It’s Saturday, it’s after 7 p.m….Marie invited Liya and her so-called “boyfriend” to come and have dinner with us! And my God, I want to see it.

I nervously play with my pen, imagining the crazy evening I’m going to have. yeah that’s it..

I finally put on my jacket and decide to leave my office. I head

to the parking lot, collect my car then set off.

•

I arrive home after a few minutes of travel, then enter my home. A nice smell of gratin greets me, making me salivate in anticipation.

I am crossing the living room when Marie appears with a radiant smile on her

lips.

– Honey, you came at the right time, we are almost finished while you wait, sit down, our guest has just arrived, she said to me, nodding at this dear guest.

He sits comfortably in my chair, and inspects every detail of the room.

I run a hand through my hair, take a deep breath, then

walk towards him.

He finally notices me, gets up immediately and offers me his hand when I reach him.

I take the time to stare at him completely with a wicked smile on my lips, his hand is still outstretched in my direction.

I finally greet him, squeeze his fingers tightly to make him understand how much his presence enchants me…note the irony…

I encourage him to take a seat and I sit down in turn.

I don’t take my eyes off him, neither does he, by his expression I guess that he doesn’t like me either! A voluntary silence sets in for several long minutes, then I decide to speak.

“Finally, you really are her boyfriend,” I say in a calm tone.

He stands up and a proud smile appears on his face.

— Yes, as you see!” he replied.

I run my fingers over my chin and smile in advance at my reply.

— And you think she loves you?!”

He tenses up at my question, his jaw tightens.

“Yes, otherwise I wouldn’t be here to meet you,” he replies immediately.

— Do you think she wanted it? It was Marie who insisted that you come to my home, I said in an icy voice.

He is about to respond but my fiancée ruins this exchange which was starting to be interesting to invite us to dinner.

We rise together,

I follow him closely and take my place next to Marie. Liya suddenly appears and places the meal in the center of the table.

I glance briefly in her direction to meet her angelic face, she greets me briefly which I respond with a nod.

She sits next to this idiot and I face him. We begin to dine in silence at first then Marie speaks up to start a discussion.

“The meal is really delicious,” said the kid.

“It was Liya who prepared it,” my fiancée replies proudly.

He gives her a tender look that makes me want to puke and Liya blushes uncomfortably.

I eat quietly even though all I want to do is kick him out of

my house.

After finishing dinner, we all sit down in the living room.

—Gabriel. pats the free place next to him and Liya sits there with a goofy smile on her lips.

My jaw clenches as he wraps his hand around her waist and pulls her closer to him possessively.

Two large blue irises meet my icy gaze, my face expresses no expression while she seems troubled, but of what?!

— So Gabriel, how old are you?” Marie begins.

— I’m 25, he says.

I would have said less given his childish face

— Liya told me that you are in the same university as her and what specialty do you plan to pursue?

— Hmm, I’m still hesitating between cardiology and orthopedics.

A future doctor! Which makes all the women upset, and a blonde in particular.

Marie seems more relaxed, she asks a few more questions, then soon she laughs out loud at his rotten jokes.

All that’s missing is that! The mother and daughter have fallen under his spell!

Quite frankly, I don’t see what he sees in her.

Liya suddenly gets up to go into the kitchen

— Bring me a glass of ice water, I say indifferently.

She glares at me, her full lips move devilishly and utters an insult that suits me! My little devil, I love it when you take out your claws

She returned shortly after with a tray full of drinks and of course my water.

Obviously I am the last one served, she leans slightly in my direction, her fruity perfume passes through my nostrils, I inhale it discreetly without her noticing. I have a crazy desire to look at her, to see her beautiful eyes and her golden hair, but I have forbidden myself since she asked me not to approach her anymore.

The few times we met in recent days, I completely ignored him.

The minutes pass, they are still talking, Marie bores me terribly with her questions, I participate very little in their discussion

I look out of the corner of my eye at Liya who has a bowl of chestnuts in her hands, which she is tasting with relish.

She doesn’t seem interested in what’s going on.

My fiancée suddenly caresses my thigh as if to get my attention, she gives me a look that says “what’s wrong? Well, nothing’s wrong! How can I tell her

that this evening has me? annoying to the highest degree! I don’t give a damn that her sweet daughter has a shitty guy.

Liya attracts our attention when she starts coughing violently.

Gabriel gently pats her on the back but does nothing about it.

She coughs again beautiful to the point of turning peony red, her eyes have blushed and

are wide open….shit she is choking.

— Oh my God Liya, Marie writes.

I get up quickly and run to her.

— Leave me I’m a doctor, he shouts.

F**k you! I push him back violently, I lift Liya, press her back against my chest and exert pressure on her abdomen. Once..twice..three times

. .she wriggles forward and holds her throat for lack of air…piss!

— Xavier…my God, screams my fiancée in panic.

I exert greater pressure and she finally spits out the bit that almost cost

her life…

I place her on the ground, she holds on tightly to me, her body trembles,

tears cloud her eyes and she breathes loudly.

– There is , . I was scared of my life, said her mother, quickly taking her in her

arms.

My heart rate is high and my breathing is irregular, I run a hand through my hair. Damn I thought she was going to go there.

She leaves again upset towards the bathroom accompanied by

her boyfriend and I replace myself alone with Marie. She sits on the chair

, nervously running a hand through her short hair. I sit next to him and put my hand around his shoulders.

— Thank you my love, fortunately you were there, she breathes reassured,

placing her forehead against mine.

I caress his cheek and close my eyelids as if to chase away what just happened.

•

They’ve been upstairs for a while now…in the bathroom! I wonder what they’re doing all this time.

After a few moments, footsteps attracted our attention.

Our dear couple finally makes their appearance.

“I’m going to have to go,” he said. “

It’s about time.”

– Already ? ? You can stay again, my fiancée continues.

She gets up immediately and approaches him.

“That’s nice but it’s already late, thank you for this evening,” he said politely.

He places a k**s on the cheek of my fiancé, this bastard, he greets me with a curt nod which I don’t respond, I take a look at Liya, she avoids my gaze and seems embarrassed. He leaves my house and she

takes him back.

I see Marie rushing towards the window with a smile on her lips, I get up and join her with raised eyebrows.

My jaw clenches and my fists clench when I see them kissing until they lose their breath.

“They’re cute, don’t you think?” she exclaims, her eyes fixed on them.

I give her a murderous look that she doesn’t see.

“I’m going up to our room,” I said in a tone of voice. cold.

I don’t wait for his reaction and climb the stairs two by two.

I enter my room and begin to unbutton my

shirt angrily.

I face my reflection and I don’t appreciate the image I see.

I’m in a bad state because of this kid who’s not yet in her twenties.

I don’t recognize myself anymore, shit! This little creature, so innocent, turned my brain upside down. She bewitched me, yes!

After passing through the bathroom, I sit on my cold bed in boxers.

Marie chose this moment to enter the room.

— Are you still not asleep?!” she asks in her sweet voice.

And for all answer, an inaudible “no” comes out of my mouth.

She changes into a nightie then settles in beside me.

— So how do you Did you replace it?” , she asks, placing her face

against my chest.

“He seems like a good guy,” I forced myself to say.

She smiles at my response then looks at me strangely.

“I feel you tense,” she whispers.

She doesn’t give me time to respond as she already replaces herself straddling me and begins to place feverish k****s on my chest.

“Marie,” I whispered, pushing her lightly by the shoulders.

“Let me relax,” she whispers in my ear and nibbles the earlobe.

She clings to me and continues her k****s on my body, I would have liked to let her do it but this is impossible, I can’t.

I push her back more firmly this time and she looks at me somewhat

surprised.

— I…not tonight darling.

She bites her lower l*p, just nods, I guess she’s

disappointed.

She doesn’t say any more words and clings to me.

A few minutes pass, from her breathing I guess she fell asleep.

I take a deep breath and try to do the same.

My desires close for a moment only to reopen the next second. I’m not

sleepy. my mind is cluttered with thoughts Or rather it haunts my thoughts! I desperately need to smell it, to touch it, to contemplate it for hours and lose myself in its natural and wild beauty.

The minutes pass without me feeling, Marie moves in her sleep and shifts from my body to turn her back on me.

I glance at the time, and I’m surprised to see that it’s after 3am.

I sigh long. It’s unbearable…it’s vital for me to see her.

I get up discreetly from bed, hastily put on my jogging pants and quietly leave our room.

I cross the long, dark corridor that leads me to his room and I stop in front of the door. My hand on my wrist, I hesitate for a moment about my absurd act.

I’m about to open it, but I change my mind. I take a step back and head in the opposite direction.

I tense up completely when I see her climbing the last steps of

the staircase. From there she notices me and she stops, staring at me with this

innocent look that makes me lose my mind.

I look at her from top to bottom, she only wears a large t-shirt that reaches her mid-thigh,

She gathers her hair on one shoulder uneasily and heads towards her

room.

“You’re better,” I said before she entered the room.

She turns around as if surprised by my question, I take advantage of this moment to get closer to her. She swallows hard, looking everywhere except at me.

— I just have a little sore throat but it’s okay and thank you very much for your help, she whispers as if not to be heard.

I move closer to her, she steps back as if by reflex and

replaces herself against the door.

– You have a sore throat ? , I breathed against his face.

I lean towards her, run my hand over her long wild hair and

pull it so that her neck is accessible to me.

And I k**s her throat…I place soft and tender k****s,

deliberately lingering on her shivering skin,

her breathing accelerates. his trembling hands rest on my chest

to stop at my shoulders. I love it when she touches me…but right now if she continues I risk doing something I’ll regret later!

I meet her eyes which have darkened, and my gaze drifts towards her

parted lips which implore me to devour them savagely.

I pass a hand over his cheek which I caress tenderly, then I delicately k**s his forehead.

— Good night Liya, I whispered into the crook of her neck to breathe in her scent one last time.

I step back from her, and turn my back to go to my room.

I shouldn’t approach him but rather continue to ignore him but it’s impossible! My whole body is crying out for her, I want her so much that it becomes painful.

I quickly rush into the dark room for fear of returning to see her

and approach the bed where my fiancée is sleeping peacefully.

I contemplate it for a long time and for the first time… guilt

eats away at me.