I Shouldn't Love Him
I Shouldn’t Love Him (Book 2) – Chapter 55

LAke

My father rarely took days off, unless it was for something he considered more important than work. Not many things have fallen into this category, but USC always has.

Which is why, at four o’clock on the Monday after I left for the fair, my father and I finished our annual campus tour. My dad proudly called me student prospect to the other parents on the tour, and I wore an old Trojans t-shirt that had belonged to him before he shrunk it in the wash.

This year was different from our last five visits. I was truly a potential student now, only two years after starting here. As college loomed on the horizon, the students around me no longer seemed ancient. They were only a few years older than me. I even went to school with kids who were attending now. The students wore strapless tops, cut-off shorts and bared their midriffs.

A boy ridden by our tour group on a skateboard. I had never even skateboarded and showing too much skin was a punishable offense at my school.

When the guide dismissed us for the afternoon, Dad led me away from the crowd.

“Did you hear what she said about starting college now?” He asked.

“Since USC is too far away a drive, we can enroll you in a community college to get credits away.”

“My teacher said one college course might be too much at my age.”

“Your teacher is an idiot. It’ll be Disneyland for where you’re headed. You shouldn’t have any trouble keeping up.

If he thought I could do it, then I’d try. He had me pushed to take advanced courses my whole life, and even though they were difficult, I always got A’s.

The buildings were big and named after people. Students walked in and out of every door, disappearing into corners or passing by us.

“How old were you when you came here?”

“Twenty. I couldn’t afford anything other than community college, so that’s where I started, but eventually transferred to USC on a scholarship. I graduated at the top of my class and went on to complete my MBA. Imagine what you can do if you start even earlier.

I thought about my conversation with Manning about my interests and how he had promised to get me books from the library.

“You don’t have to. You can be anything you want. Doctor, lawyer, accountant.

“Mona wants to be a teacher.”

“The world needs teachers,” he said as we “But we also need leaders. If you like working with kids, like you do at camp, you could be a pediatrician. Then you can spend all day doing something valuable.” Saving lives.

I didn’t remember much about doctors’ offices, but my dentist was in a perpetual bad mood.

“Wouldn’t it be sad to take care of sick children? What if I can’t make them better?” »

“If you decide to take this path, you can take different paths. ty can be an obstetrician. Try to be sad while giving birth to a baby.

“How many years of school is this?”

“Probably eight, including undergraduate, followed by residency. I know that sounds like a lot, but you’re young. And you’re lucky, Lake. Your mother and I are willing to pay for everything so that you can emerge debt-free in the end. College loans are a burden and USC is at the top when it comes to tuition. You won’t have to struggle for years like I did to pay them.

Eight years and counting.

I could not understand. I would be twenty-six or older when I graduated, which meant I still had over ten years left as a student. I had spent my whole life hearing about USC and how great the university was – I looked forward to being around other people who loved the school and wanted to learn. But another decade seemed overwhelming.

“Look, there’s the College of Commerce and Business Administration,” Dad said, pointing as if I didn’t already know the sandstone-colored brick building with the majestic arches. “I spent many hours there becoming the man I am today. Let’s take a look inside.

On the front lawn, a small group of students had arranged rubber mats in rows. They were dressed casually in shorts and tank tops. Two of them were sitting picking blades of grass. We were reading a book. None of them spoke to each other.

My father opened a door and we walked down the hall. He tried a few handles. “Maybe there’s a summer conference we can attend.”

“What was your favorite class?” ” I

don’t know if I had a favorite,” he said. “I enjoyed learning about strategy and operations.

How to minimize costs and maximize profits. He looked out the window of one of the doors before continuing. “You know what I hated? Advanced statistics. It’s an important class, don’t get me wrong, but it was damn difficult.

My jaw almost hit the floor.

“You hated a class?” »

“Of course I did. Do you think I liked learning how to calculate standard deviation or worrying about variance and outliers?” He looked over his shoulder, saw my expression and said, “Oh, Lake. You think that, don’t you?

The way he was talking about college and what awaited me, I didn’t think there was anything that he wasn’t lacking about it.

He laughed.

“I know you think I’m fanatical about this stuff, but I just want to give you opportunities. Do you think I work as hard as I do for any reason other than to take care of you girls?”

The truth is, I never really thought about it. I just assumed he worked all the time because he loved it.

” I’m sorry, Dad. I didn’t realize. . Thank you.”

He laughed, held my face and kissed my forehead.

“I’m not asking for a thank you. I’m just trying to explain that if I’m hard on you, it’s because I want the best for you. I’m proud of you, Lake. You have so much potential. I want to give you every chance to achieve it.

My throat thickens. I knew he was proud, but it was good to hear him say it every once in a while.

“I will,” I said.

I didn’t know how, but I had always been a good student, always took the time to do better, and I didn’t see that changing anytime soon.

“I promise.”

One of the locked doors opened and a blonde woman who looked a little older than Tiffany leaned out.

“Can I help you?”

Dad turned around.

“Oh. Sorry if we disturbed you. We were just checking things out. He put his arm around my shoulder. “My daughter is a future student.” She smiled at me. “Welcome

. Are you going to apply to business school?

Dad had told me a few times that in business and in life, it was important to have confidence in yourself, especially when you weren’t. I straightened my shoulders. “Yes.”

Dad squeezed my shoulder.

“Well, I’m an assistant professor in the business economics department. Maybe by the time you get here, I’ll have my doctorate and you’ll be in my class. “How about that, Lake?”

He said winked at the woman. “You already know a teacher.”

She laughed. “Well, not yet.”

“Maybe I’ll come with my daughter, sit in your class,” he said.

She was speechless. “Of course I have. Forget about sitting in my class – I will shamelessly beg you for a guest lecture. I might as well have left the room. My dad had a weird look on his face, he wouldn’t go around Mom, something I thought was borderline flirtatious. Whatever he was doing, I didn’t think I wanted to witness it. “I’m going to go out and explore a little,” I said. “Don’t

go “Not too far,” Dad said as he released me. “We have to leave soon to get back in time for dinner.” “

So I know all about CEOs and CFOs,” she said as I walked away, “but COOs are a little more mysterious. What exactly do you do?”

Dad had a standard answer to this question, but his tone changed depending on who was asking the question. Sometimes it was meant to end a conversation. Other times, like this , it was an invitation to ask for more. “A little of this, a little of that.”

I left them in the hallway and headed outside. The sun was beginning to set in the late afternoon, making the orange sky. The students I had seen earlier were lying on their backs on the lawn while a bearded man weaved through the maze of mats. Each had one hand on their stomach and the other on their chest.

“We will start each session by consulting our body,” he said. “Breathe through your diaphragm. Not sure how? The hand on your stomach should go higher than the hand on your chest. Inhale. Keep your eyes open closed. He looked at me. “Now exhale for eight counts and expel from your body everything that does not belong to this class.” He looked around and nodded. “Breathe. Your life depends on it. Your grade does too. A few people laughed. I had gotten closer than I thought, but they seemed so at peace. “Want to

join?”

I blinked at the man. ” Sorry?”

“We have room.”

It didn’t look like that. They had created two even rows. “There are no more mats.”

“Do you need one?”

I hadn’t thought to that. I could just sit in the grass. “No, but I’m waiting for my . .” I stopped myself from saying dad They were students. They had already left the house. “My turn.”

“Then lie down until then.” He pointed to the end of a row.

It was tempting. Ever since I met Manning, I seemed to think about him or little things like what books I really wanted to read or how I could get to Tower Records to buy a Pink Floyd CD. I, too, wanted to sink into the grass and turn off my brain, sending my problems into the air like balloons. With no sign of my father, I lay down on the ground.

“We will stay in this position for sixty seconds. You have a lot of responsibilities as students, friends, children, brothers and sisters. Don’t be afraid to think of nothing for a change. Clear your mind. That was easier said than done. My mind wandered to business school, then to how Manning had asked me for a list of my interests. What were they, though? I did well in math, but did I want to make it my career? I couldn’t imagine anyone did it. Making people feel better appealed to me, but not things like b***d, surgery, and medical records. I loved reading and cooking for others. I had been a camp counselor last year and student council treasurer for my sophomore class. However, none of this really fit into a profession that I could think of. Maybe Manning would know once he saw the list.

“We will stay in this position for sixty seconds. You have a lot of responsibilities as students, friends, children, brothers and sisters. Don’t be afraid to think of nothing for a change. Clear your mind. That was easier said than done. My mind wandered to business school, then to how Manning had asked me for a list of my interests. What were they, though? I did well in math, but did I want to make it my career? I couldn’t imagine anyone did it. Making people feel better appealed to me, but not things like b***d, surgery, and medical records. I loved reading and cooking for others. I had been a camp counselor last year and student council treasurer for my sophomore class. However, none of this really fit any profession that I could think of. Maybe Manning would know once he saw the list.

“You can sit down now,” the man said.

I opened my eyes as a breeze rustled the leaves of the nearby trees. Despite being on a busy college campus, our spot on the lawn was quiet. I stood up slowly, blinking my eyes to adjust to the sunlight. I scratched my elbow, itching from the grass. Everyone was smiling.

“Welcome to the summer session of Drama 101.” He looked at me. “I’m Professor Bronstein, but you can call me Sal.”

I checked over my shoulder. My father was outside the building but still talking to the assistant professor.

“We’ll meet here before class from now on.” Once we enter the classroom, you have two jobs. Become the role you play and support each other. Sometimes you’ll feel stupid – I guarantee it. You’ll also feel triumphant, and a few other things in between. Trusting your classmates will go a long way in getting the most out of this experience. “But we just met, and the summer session only lasts a few weeks,” someone pointed out.

“Precisely. We have little time to gain each other’s trust, so let’s start with an exercise. Turn to face the person next to you.

Still deep in conversation, my father didn’t seem to notice that I wasn’t there. Since I was at the end of the row, I could only go one way. I sat cross-legged facing a dark-haired girl. “Hi,” she said softly. “I am Les.”

“I’m not really in this…”

“Now,

Les looked as surprised as I did. I had met her two seconds ago, and now I had to get my hands on her? It felt like an intrusion. None of us moved. She stifled a laugh.

“Or?” someone asked. “How?”

“You already have all the instructions I intend to give,” the professor replied.

Les and I exchanged a sheepish look before I closed my eyes.

A cold finger rested on my cheek. Les chuckled. “Pardon.”

“Don’t talk,” Sal said.

It was even more uncomfortable not being able to laugh about it. I placed my palm on Les’s face, and it warmed his cheek. I had to stop myself from apologizing too.

“Good,” said the professor. “Try reading your partner this way. Tune into their emotions.

“Lake?” I heard from somewhere behind me.

“You’re nervous,” Les said.

“What?”

“You just jumped. “

I-I have to go.” We both opened our eyes. I stood up, brushing the grass off my legs and announced, “My turn is here.” Sal nodded

. See you later, then.” I waved to get my dad’s attention as I ran towards him. The blonde was nowhere to be found. “What were you doing?” he asked, removing a twig of my hair.

“They invited me to join a class.” Maybe acting was something I could add to the list for Manning. I had only been interested in it for five minutes, but given that I had no idea what else to wear, it was worth a try. “Maybe I’ll sign up for first year.” “

What class?”

“Drama.”

He sniffed and walked over. towards the parking lot. I hurried to follow. “I never understood why this department was so important here. It’s silly, but I guess not everyone can be good enough to do the things that really matter.

It was the best opening I was going to have. I scratched my head. “Um, Dad, you know. . if drama is a big deal here, they might like to see it on my application.

“Maybe.”

“Maybe I could start looking into it now.” Either at school or as an extracurricular.

“Hmm.” He put his hands in his pockets. “You need to choose electives next year. This might round out your schedule a bit.

I didn’t know what to say other than “thank you.” It was rare to get what I wanted if it wasn’t his idea. Tiffany and my mother, on the other hand, frequently got what they wanted. Maybe he was finally starting to see me as an adult.