III. The Impact of Her -
~ Twenty-Two ~
My head turned in an instant.
Laura stood behind me with a bouquet of sunflowers and daisies in her hands. Gently, she walked towards me without breaking eye contact with me. “May I?” she asked as she referred to the flowers she brought.
I nodded.
She left a small kiss on the bouquet before she put it on top of Lady’s grave. She then proceeded to sit beside me without a word.
We stayed that way for a long while. We were so close and yet, so far. I wanted so badly to pull her into my arms and hold her tight. But at the same time, I wanted to push her away. I wanted for her to stay as far away as possible so I could recover from the pain that was inflicted on me.
I knew she didn’t deserve to be blamed for the pain I had been feeling for days. But she became a part of the problem as Benjamin chose her to be his wife.
I cleared my throat to diffuse the tension between us. “So, what happened between you and Benjamin?” I asked as I kept my eyes on the sunset.
“He left a few minutes after you did,” Laura replied with a faint voice.
I nodded slightly. “When will the festivities be held?” I asked another. For certain, she was already set to be a bride.
“Festivities?” she asked, baffled.
“The wedding, I mean.”
She pulled my shoulder as she forced me to look at her. “Do you see an engagement ring on my fingers?” she asked as she held out her hands.
Indeed, there was no ring. But I didn’t get my hopes up. Perhaps, they preferred to work through their differences first in order to build a long-lasting relationship.
“Then, when is the celebration?” I asked another.
She frowned. “A celebration for what?”
“There is no doubt that Benjamin will hold a grand and glorious banquet for your response to his proposal,” I replied. “I simply want to know when and where it will be held so I can prepare for it.”
‘That is, if I am invited to the celebration,’ I thought to myself.
There was an uncertainty if Benjamin would invite me to any celebrations for the two of them. I also wouldn’t expect Laura to invite me as well. She should know by now that her relationship with my closest friend has left me scarred. And the mere sight of here only hurt me more.
My thoughts were interrupted when she moved closer to me and said, “Robert, I never agreed to what he wanted.”
My brows furrowed. Did I hear her correctly? She didn’t give Benjamin the answer he expected?
“I couldn’t,” she continued.
“Why?”
She sighed, her shoulders fell as she held my hands. She looked me in the eyes and asked, “Why must I give my heart to someone who isn’t worthy of it?
“Who deserves your heart, then?” I asked.
With a smile, she explained, “I once told myself that I shall kiss the hands of the man who will win my heart. It will be the sign of my deep affection, my devotion towards him.”
I cleared my throat. “And who is this man that you speak of? Is he the one whom you mentioned before? The one where your heart is already set on?” I asked. My heart raced even more as we continued this conversation.
Slowly, she laid a kiss on both my hands. She caressed the spots that she kissed before she looked back at me. “The one whose hands I just kissed.”
Everything came to a screeching halt.
“Me?” It was the only response I could utter as I held back my tears. My mind panicked as I tried to process what she just said and did.
“Who else?” she smiled as a tear left her eye. She continued, “Robert, as I got to know you more, you have only proven yourself to be the man I prayed and waited for. You taught me how to trust. You have shown me genuine love and care. Something that I thought only the people in the bakery could give me. And from the very moment our hands touched, I already knew.”
I sniffled as tears ran down my face. “But, Laura, I am not Benjamin. I cannot give you what he can.”
“I never asked for material things, Robert. The superficial matters never made me happy,” she replied.
I closed my eyes and lowered my head. I didn’t know how to respond. She never said such things to me, which made it even harder for me to understand her admission. I never anticipated for her to do such a thing. She never gave any implications that she felt the same way as I did.
Then, I felt her forehead on mine. She whispered, “Robert, I understand if you cannot accept my heart. As a prince, I know of your marriage arrangement. And I know that you do not want to break your vows as the heir of your kingdom.” She continued, “I only ask that you always remember my love for you and the fact that it will never change.”
With those simple words, my heart melted. My stomach turned and my eyes widened. All those times that we spent together, not once did she show her true feelings towards me. She was always distant, detached from everything. And for her to show her vulnerability, I didn’t know how to react.
She was about to stand up but I grabbed her hands. Never would I let go of these hands. Never would I allow another man to hold her hands.
I raised my head and came face to face with her. I put her hands where my heart was. With my other hand, I cupped her cheek. Softly, I caressed her with my thumb. And she closed her eyes as she buried her face into my hand.
“Laura, your words… you don’t know how much they mean to me,” I started as I tried my best to compose myself. I continued, “To be the man that you love is an incredible honour. However, I cannot promise that I will be able to give you a life, filled with treasures and glamour. All I can give you is me.”
I tightened my hold on her hand as I pressed it harder onto my chest, “This heart, this body - my entire being - is all that I can offer you. My devotion, my affection, and my care. Me and me alone; that is all that I can offer. And I will always apologise to you for not giving you more than that, even if I wanted to.”
She smiled as another tear fell from her glistening eye. “That is all I could ever ask for, Robert,” she said. Her other hand grasped onto my shirt as she sobbed happy tears.
I pulled her into my arms. My hold on her tightened as she clung onto me. Finally, I could say that I was complete. The love that I longed for has been given to me. The woman that I hoped for was in my arms. And the gap that Lady left in my heart was slowly filled by Laura’s warmth.
I turned to Lady’s grave and I couldn’t help but smile as I thanked her in my mind.
As we stayed in a long embrace, she continued to cry. Slowly, I pulled away from her and held her face. “Why do tears continue to fall down such a beautiful face?” I asked.
She sniffled for a bit and replied, “I was afraid, Robert.” She hiccuped as she added, “When you left me with Benjamin, I was overwhelmed with fear. I never thought that I would feel that way.”
My brows furrowed as I asked another, “What were you afraid of?”
She wiped her nose and said, “I was afraid… that after you walked away… you will never give our love a chance.”
I was gutted as she said that. I stopped my own tears as I kissed her forehead. Then, I looked into her eyes and smiled, “My sweet, I guarantee you this: that will never happen.” I held her hands and continued, “I will fight for you, Laura. I will fight whatever it is that we have. And you must never forget that. Do you understand?”
She nodded instantly.
I hugged her once again and I could feel her smile in my arms. As the sunset continued right in front of us, I somehow felt Lady’s presence in the wind.
It felt as if she was watching over us, satisfied that everything worked beyond my expectations. I imagined her as she looked at us from above, happy that Laura and I were finally together.
When I returned back home, Bethilda’s fancy carriage was at the foot of the stairs by the main door.
Curious, I quickly returned my horse to the stables and rushed to the main hall. When I got there, Mother, James and Bethilda stood at the centre of the room. Servants carried her belongings to the carriage as they spoke to one another.
“Do you have to leave so soon, Bethilda?” James asked.
“James, it is quite clear that your children do not want me here,” Bethilda spatted. “From the very day that I arrived, I received nothing but hostility from them, especially from you son,” she continued.
“Dearest sister, you must be mistaken,” Mother intervened. She argued, “Our children are taught to have exemplary manners. They are simply not used to having you around because you rarely visit. But I am certain that they mean no harm or disrespect.”
“Manners?” Bethilda scoffed. “Do you call it manners as they disrespect their aunt? Their behaviour is nothing better than animals!” she screamed at Mother’s face. “Animals, you hear?!” She then turned to the both of them and ranted further, “What sort of parents are you? Their poor treatment towards a relative is the result of poor parenting! You should be ashamed of yourselves!”
My blood boiled as I witnessed how Bethilda humiliated my parents. And she had the audacity to do that inside our own home. She had no right to scream at their faces. She had no right to judge how we were raised. I could accept it if those insults were thrown onto me. At the very least, I would be the one to accept them before Mother and James.
But to directly say that to them was different. We were raised by parents who were also parents to an entire kingdom. That wasn’t something that any person or couple could do.
Bethilda has indeed crossed the line.
“For those complaints to come from a living embodiment of a boar is an absolute shock,” I remarked as I approached them.
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