Love conquers all
20. Why did you do it?

It was 6 o’clock when Nathan had left my room, every morning for a week now, to go to his house and get ready for school. One day I thought I saw my mother in the garden and I immediately hid Nathan behind the curtain, she didn’t say anything to me so I thought that everything went smoothly. It made me uncomfortable talking to my parents about my feelings of love, especially with my father, so as long as I could avoid it, I would.

I had never visited my brother’s grave in all that time.

That day I washed and dressed quickly, I felt the need to go and let off steam with him.

When I was almost at the entrance, my mother called me: “Myra ...“; I turned and she was walking towards me.

“Yes mom.”

“I know very well what it means to be Mate, but don’t you think you’re bonding a little too much?”

“I didn’t get the point of the speech, if it had one!?”

“Myra! Don’t get a deaf ear to me. You know what the point is!”

“No, Mom, tell me what you want to talk about more clearly.” I knew what she was referring to but I wanted to avoid the conversation.

“Nathan sleeping in your room at night for a week. That’s what I want to talk about.”

“How…”

“It doesn’t matter how, what matters is that you have to have a little detachment. He has to pursue his hobbies, have friends, study for his future, he has to sleep in his bed.”

“What does all this have to do with the fact that we sleep together?”

“You don’t sleep alone, you’re at school all day, walking together, doing everything together. Have you thought about what he will do, or what his life will be like when you are gone? You have to make sure that he is committed to everything that it’s not about being with you. ”

“Do you really think I’ve never thought about it? That I don’t feel bad every time I think about it? That I too would have wanted all these things and I won’t be able to live them? My life is shit at the moment. You don’t know what I’m going through this period, and as if that weren’t enough now I also have the weight of Val’s death ... ” I couldn’t continue that conversation with her because of the lump in my throat. Tears blocked my vocal cords. I ran away, leaving my mother at the door calling me: “Myra ...“; I was out of that situation. I did not want to say things that I would regret later on. My mother didn’t deserve it. The truth is sometimes a bitch that must be avoided.

When I got to Val’s grave, I immediately noticed that it had already been fixed. There was a photo, which they had taken on my birthday. Fresh flowers adorned the ground and I sat down in the garden.

Between tears I began to talk to him: “Val, why did you do that? Why didn’t you let the rogues take my life? You wanted to be a hero, huh, that’s what you wanted? You had a better future than this. A pack, to guide and inspire, a Mate to love and puppies to adore. This had to be my place, not yours. I am a walking dead, why did you do it? Why??? ”

“Myra…“; I turned my head in the direction from which came the voice that had spoken my name. Nathan, he was looking at me with a hurt expression.

“What’s up?” I blurted out.

“What are you saying?”

“I’m telling the truth, nothing you don’t already know!”

“Your brother died to save you, his beloved little sister.”

“Well he shouldn’t have done that, it was stupid! I will be dead in less than two months and what does he do ...”

Nathan turned into a wolf, Falco without looking at me went away with thundering paws for speed.

Why was it all so difficult?! Why was there no way out of all this?

I cried all the tears I had, down to the last drop.

I entered school in the second hour, there was an English lesson. When I entered the classroom Nathan was not at his desk, I was sad not to see him, but I expected it.

At the end of the lesson I went home and walked straight to my room, I didn’t want to see anyone, hear anyone, talk to anyone. I would have stayed the rest of the day and night in my room.

I thought maybe my mom was right, I had to put some distance between me and Nathan. The next moment, however, I felt the lack of him crush my heart. How could I not be with him every second? I survived today, but at what cost? I was sad, I felt lonely, I felt a hole in my chest. Then I had an idea: I was going to throw myself headlong into organizing the end of year party.

Keeping my mind busy was an idea that could, should have worked.

First, I should have informed the principal and vice president of the student body of my situation. When I was elected president, I didn’t know about the monster that was going to ruin my life. I could not have attended the party, because there were five long months left, which I did not have; but I would have committed to making the party my end-of-year gift for them. A stratospheric party that my friends would never forget.

I fell asleep thinking about party ideas. I woke up in the middle of the night with an arm around my waist and Nathan’s warm breath on my neck. I made no movement, no noise, the only thing I could do was smile. My soul was free and light with him by my side. I could not deny how being close to him made me complete.

I could not deny the deep bond that I had sewn on my heart, tying it to his. All this, however, I had to keep to myself at the moment. I would have given my mother’s idea a chance, to leave space between us. I fell asleep again and when I woke up to the sound of the alarm, I found myself alone in bed. Nathan was already gone!

I was taking the chemistry book from the locker when my friends came over.

“Good morning, Myra!” Andrea greeted me first.

“Good morning girls!” I said closing the locker and turning to them.

“How come alone?”

“Yeah, where did you leave your Doctor?” Asked Abby.

“Girls…”

“Did something happen?” Aurora asked, seeing my sad expression.

“No, nothing happened. I have to go to a meeting with the principal.” I said with an unconvincing smile, but I hadn’t lied, I had only told half of the story.

“See you for lunch, then?!” Abby said unconvinced.

“Yes, see you for lunch. Have a nice day, girls!” I said going off in big strides to avoid other questions that I didn’t want to answer.

Talking about my health with people who didn’t share any kind of bond with me turned out to be pretty simple. The only thing I didn’t like at all was holding up their pitying looks, typical of someone who feels terminally ill. Rosalinda, the vampire, my vice president, proposed something that left me speechless.

“Why don’t we bring the party up? Like we do it for New Year’s.” Why hadn’t I thought of it? I wondered.

The principal looked at me waiting for my reply.

“Rosalinda, your idea is fantastic! Thanks ...”

“Unofficially, girls, I inform you that I give you permission to organize the prom party for the evening of December 31st.”

“Thanks, Sir!”

“Myra, whatever, I’m here for you. You know my office!” I bowed my head in response and left his office, followed by Rosalind.

“Myra, I’m really sorry about what’s happening to you. If you want to delegate part of your work to me, know that I am willing to accept. After all, I’m your deputy, it’s part of my job.”

“Thanks, Rosalinda. Above all I want to thank you for proposing to bring the party forward. I have to tell you the truth: I hadn’t thought about it. ”

“As I told you, I am at your complete disposal.”

“I have to go to class. Thanks again.”

“Not at all, Myra”

I was walking down the empty corridor to get to my classroom, I was late, that was all I could think of. Suddenly someone pulled me by the wrist in an empty room.

“What the hell ... Nathan.”

“Shh… Yes, it’s me. I saw you enter the principal’s office, did something happen? ”

“No, I’m the student body president and I had a meeting.”

“Do you want to skip school?”

“What, sorry ?!” I hadn’t really heard Nathan say those words!

“You said you were going to skip school with me someday, remember?” True, I said that long ago, but what about my attempt to spend less time together. Why couldn’t I be mad at him? At that moment I was really torn, what was I supposed to do? Follow my heart or follow my mind?