Maliha
58: Celebration

“How long have you both been sitting up here?”

Maliha and Kaori’s heads snapped up as Makaio stepped into their vision. His bare chest was glistening with sweat and he held his warrior mask in his hand.

“I’m not sure. What are you doing with that?” Maliha asked nodding towards his mask.

Makaio lifted it up, looking at the mask with a lopsided grin before motioning her over. “You’ll see when you two finally leave this cliff.” He stretched his hand out for her to take. Maliha placed her hand in her brother’s palm before looking at her father.

“I’ll be down in a moment.”

Both Makaio and Maliha nodded sombrely before retreating down the rocky cliff. Maliha tried to focus on each step she took but her father’s words and her brother ramblings were distracting her. she couldn’t count the number of times she nearly tumbled down the rocky terrain until her rother halted their retreated and turned to face her.

“I know you are nervous and probably still in shock, but don’t let that man get into your head.”

“What are you talking about?” Maliha scoffed, looking at everything but her brother. Makaio heaved a deep sigh as he began listing off what both Maliha and him knew he was discussing.

“I’m talking about your reaction to Ujarak’s presence. Your anger and then the way you snuck away from the tribe. I saw it all and I’m telling you to not let his weak apology get into your head. His actions should demonstrate what he feels and thus far, his actions have fallen short.”

“I mean, he did allow both you and father to pound his face in without retaliating. He has been reunited with the Nah Barros and he is here now,” Maliha argued half-heartedly.

“Yes, and of all of those actions, which one of those demonstrate his love for you? None.” Makaio snapped before she could respond. “They show his guilt and perhaps his growth as a man but none of those actions shows me that he is truly sorry.”

Maliha nodded her head in reluctant agreement. Though a lot of Ujarak’s actions could be seen with her in mind, none of them were truly done for her alone. Yes, he may have initially came to the Nah Barros looking for her, which was a gesture within itself but was it enough of a gesture for Maliha to forgive him again. Had he truly changed?

“Think on it. He will likely try to single you out again tonight and though he may speak a sweet game, I believe you should remain guarded until he shows his sincerity.”

“You don’t think he is sincere?”

Makaio tilted his head in thought. “In some regards, yes, I believe he is. I believe he is truly over harbouring hate for us, he is truly sorry for hurting you and Enzo and he truly wants you back. I’m just not so sure how sincere or strong his feelings for you are.”

Maliha held her own doubts about Ujarak’s feelings towards her and so Makaoi’s words were not as surprising as they should have been. It hurt Maliha to acknowledge that she wasn’t the only one with reservations about Ujarak and she wondered who else felt this way.

Sensing her forlorn feelings, Makaio outreached his hand for her and continued their climb down the cliff. Maliha’s feet ached as they made way back through the tall grass and to the centre of the Nah Barros land.

The melodic sounds of drums and rattling of beads had Maliha’s excitement climbing the closer and closer they got to the crowd of people. her feet took off in a fast walk as she made her way to the roaring fire that flickered in vibrant hues at the water’s edge. Maliha looked back to her brother for an explanation and nearly jumped out of her skin as his masked face met hers. A sharp keening noise came from his mouth as the drums climbed louder. More people with masks appeared as they began dancing around the fire, their focus directly on her as a song rose higher and higher on the wind. Tribesmen and women swayed and stomped along to the beat as the warriors lead by her brother danced to the song of belonging. Bumps rose along Maliha’s skin as their dance spoke of her story. A story of a lost child who was mourned for years and eventually returned home. The vividness of the dance had Maliha smiling and clapping along with everyone as the warrior’s danced with fervour and love. When the dance was over they removed their masks and huddled around Maliha, laughing as she praised them all individually.

Kaiori appeared through the crowd and hugged both of his children before breaking off in a foreign dialogue that had Maliha confused as she tried to pick up on words. Her father finished of his spiel by gathering her hands in his and kissing them both. Everyone cheered and screeched as he pulled her into a tighter embrace as if he feared to let her go.

“I just told them what was inside my heart. It is full of the knowledge that my daughter will always walk with us regardless of whether you stay here or go elsewhere.” As her father subtly motioned to the few Der Surjaz people who stood to enjoy the festivities.

“I am glad I found you and I love you both.” Maliha pulled her father and brother into another emotional hug. Her eyes closing as she savoured this feeling of being in the arms of loved ones.

“Now go and have fun. Your aunt Filsan is here somewhere. She wants to paint your hands and so many of the woman would like to offer you garments to wear in your new life. Go and enjoy your celebration.”

Squeezing her father’s hand one last time, Maliha ran off into the crowd of dancing and celebrating people. She found her aunt not too far away from the fire. Filsan kissed both of Maliha’s cheeks as she sat her down on a chair and began picking out her paints. Maliha smiled to herself as she watched everyone enjoying themselves, her smile growing wide as she spotted Enzo playing chase with some of the children. He stopped and waved at her before running off into the crowd. A woman came up to Maliha and offered to do her hair. Maliha excitedly agreed as the woman took out her tools, oils and adornments. The woman stood over Maliha as she began plaiting her hair as Filsan began her painting. Food and drink were handed to Maliha as she sat there swaying to the music and soaking up the beautiful atmosphere. She spotted Xiuri and spoke to her for a small while before her friend retreated to sleep for the night.

“What colour do you want next?” Maliha looked at all the pots and jars that Filsan had on the table before selecting a vibrant blue and green.

Filsan smiled knowingly before continuing her painting of Maliha’s skin. The body paints were natural dyes that would stain her skin temporarily in the selected patterns and colours. Filsan often crafted what she felt best matched the person and thus far Maliha’s painting was that of flowers with small thorns prickled along them.

“Thank you,” Maliha grinned as she took the cup of warm liquid from the woman who had just finished doing her hair. Maliha kissed her cheek in thanks, before sipping on the drink. The warm liquid burnt her throat and caused her eyes to water.

“Don’t drink too much of that or else.

“I think that warning has come a little too late,” Maliha chuckled, her world spinning slightly.

“How many of those have you had?” Filsan laughed, trying her hardest to keep Maliha still and seated.

“I stopped counting after the first three,” Maliha slurred. She had been sipping on the drink to take away from the pain of the woman who had been braiding her hair into intricate patterns. The drink had numbed the pain, but it seemed that wasn’t all the drink had done.

Filsan chuckled as she finished off with her painting. “Make sure she lets this dry for at least an hour before wiping it off.”

“Who are you talking to?” Maliha questioned as she titled her head backwards and tried to look at whoever Filsan was talking to, but the action only caused her world to spin violently. “Give her some water while you are caring for her. I would hate to see what she fares like in the morning without some.”

’I don’t need any water,” Maliha hiccupped as she was pulled to her feet. “Wow, you are so tall.” She chuckled. Patting the man’s chest as before trying to stagger away from him.

“Not so fast, let me help you with that.” his thick arms wrapped around her as he pulled her away from the partying people and to a secluded tent. Maliha’s natural inclination was to fight the man off but there was something about him that seemed familiar. She knew him, but she couldn’t remember how, not with the alcohol swirling through her mind. Instead, she allowed him to pull her towards his tent before she collapsed into a heap on the warm furs. Her mind blanked out before she could even ask his name.

When Maliha woke the next morning, her head was pounding, and her mouth felt dry. Her breath was stale, and she felt like throwing what little she had left in her stomach up.

“Water is to the left of the bed.” Maliha snatched for the water and gulped it back, her throat crying in relief as the cool liquid soothed her.

She poured herself another cup and savoured the drink as she stared at Ujarak over the lip of her cup. He stared at her heatedly, reminding her that she was barely dressed from the night before. Maliha tightened the material of her gown around her body before climbing from the bed. She was a little unsteady on her feet but was determined to leave this tent and Ujarak’s unnerving stare.

“Thank you for taking care of me and for the water. I hope I wasn’t too difficult.”

“Not at all,” Ujarak guffawed humorously knowing full and well that she had been trouble.

Maliha nodded her head awkwardly as she placed the cup back down on the floor. “Okay, well I guess I’ll be leaving now. Thanks again.” Maliha’s words dried up as Ujarak stood to his feet and blocked the only exit.

“I wanted to talk to you. I was going to wait until you were feeling better but knowing you, you will probably try to avoid me.”

“Which is my right,” Maliha interjected already annoyed by his words and actions.

“I know it’s your right Maliha, but is it also not mine to try and speak to you? I know you are angry at me but please give me the chance to apologise.”

“No,” Maliha snapped. “In the short time I have known you, I have heard you apologise for more times than I can count, and your actions always contradict your words. I do not want to hear another pointless apology because you clearly do not mean them.”

“Then what do you want?” he gritted, running his fingers through his long hair.

“I would like for you to have never said those words to me. I would like for you to have never discarded me the way you did, and I would love for you to have not broken my heart, but I can’t have everything that I wish for so please just leave me alone.”

“I can’t do that. I don’t want to do that!” He shouted.

“Why not? You were happy to do that not so long ago but now you can’t? How does that make any sense, Ujarak?”

“I was angry, and I felt betrayed. I’m not trying to take away from my actions because they were wrong.” He hastily added when Maliha’s face turned red as she prepared to curse him out. “I was wrong for what I said, and nothing can deduct from what I said and the way I hurt you. I was callous and cruel, but Maliha I love you.”

Maliha scoffed at him, “You don’t even know what love is. You have said so yourself. No one taught you how to love and instead of figuring out yourself you have used me as your test trial. Pushing me and pulling me all so you could figure out how to love correctly and all the while I have been hurting. I have been left bruised and broken by your love and I don’t want that anymore. I deserve more.”

“I know,” he sighed defeatedly. “You deserve the world Maliha. I know that, but I want to be the one to provide you with that. I can’t excuse my words or actions of the past, but I have taken the time to evaluate my actions. All this time, I have been scared to hurt my Sujurrah like my father did my mother when all along that was what I was doing. I was so focused on the past that I didn’t realise how it was hurting me, how it would hurt you. I am truly sorry.

“I know my words seem hollow and unmeaningful to you, but I swear it Maliha. I love you and I am so sorry. Sorry that I hurt you and made you doubt your place. You will always have a home with the Der Surjaz and I had no right to suggest otherwise.”

“You had no right to take them from me!” Maliha cried, her hand thumping at her side. She was beyond crying, she had no more tears left to cry. She couldn’t force a tear out of her eyes even if she tried. This situation had been transpiring for too long and Maliha’s heart had cried all it could, now all she could feel was anger and indignation.

“I know I had no right but what I don’t understand is why you allowed me to chase you away.”

Maliha looked skywards as she prayed for strength to get through this difficult conversation. “Besides actually wanting to meet my family, I was scared Ujarak. The Der Surjaz were and always will be your tribe and as much as I felt that I belonged, I couldn’t bear the thought of them rejecting me, so I left before they could.” Maliha shrugged solemnly knowing that her actions had not only hurt herself and Enzo but that the small tribe she had been forming had also been hurt.

“They would have never rejected you Maliha. They all knew what I was too stubborn to see and that was the obvious fact that you are my Sujurrah. A hundred women have come before you and a hundred can come after you, but none of them will have the effect that you had on my people, on me. My stubbornness had me clinging to this idea of a woman, but I hadn’t realised that you were everything I thought my Sujurrah would be and so much more. I just hope my wilful ignorance and mistreatment of you hasn’t ruined what I believe the Goddess has ordained.”

Ujarak had always spoken a pretty game. He was a master of words. He had the capacity to either make you feel loved or hated with a swipe of his tongue but this time Maliha needed more than the sweet nothings he had been uttering. She needed more.

Resolving herself to her decision, she straightened her back and narrowed her eyes at him. Taking in all those features that she loved and missed dearly. “If the goddess has truly ordained we be together than time will not hinder that.” With those final words, Maliha left Ujarak’s tent with not even a thought to look back.