My Fiancée Hates Me
Chapter 77: Forgive Yourself

"Let's go somewhere else after this," I said to him as he sat down in front of me.

"...Where?"

"Somewhere special," I answered him with a smile.

Within half an hour, we arrived at Vance's true home that he had not came back to ever since his proclaimed death. His parents only received a simple letter with a royal seal and instructions to hold a funeral with an empty casket. His look of wonder was a rather interesting face.

"This is..."

When we got down from the carriage, we could see Baron Grass and his wife stood waiting for us in front of their home.

I simply nodded in Vance's direction and allowed him a lovely moment with his family.

They all shared in a warm embrace with one another and shared a few tears.

"...This lovely young lady is?" Baron Grass asked.

"I am Arielle Ira Maddox...daughter of Prime Minister Triston Maddox and Duchess Amalie Ira Nereus Maddox," I said with a curtsy.

"Greetings! I am Baron Gregory Grass and this is my wife Calla Grass," Baron Grass said in a panicky manner.

"Your son has been very good to me at the Academy. Pardon me for my manners...I wanted to express my thanks to the people that raised him to become such a fine young man. I apologize if I took too much time out of your day."

"Not at all! You are too kind Lady Arielle," Baron Grass said. "Let's have some tea together in the garden."

We had some tea and snacks together on the patio. I let Vance catch up with his parents about his independency and his studies while I just sipped tea by myself.

"...I never once thought that Dolt...Sir Vance would bring such a lovely young lady here to show her to us," Baroness Grass said.

"Not at all...I am in debt to him. He is a fine young man. It is too bad that I was unable to meet your other children. I have heard many stories about them."

Her eyes were locked on my figure and peered me up and down. I tried to pay no mind to her intense stares.

"There will be plenty of chances to see them. You must definitely attend my next tea party, Lady Arielle."

"Of course, Baroness," I replied.

"... How about Sir Vance take Lady Arielle on a stroll through the garden? The roses are lovely this season," Baroness Grass suggested.

She intends to make me her daughter-in-law...

"M-Mother, she cannot..."

I took in Vance's hand.

"I will be fine if you are there to support me," I said with a smile.

Vance reluctantly accepted the suggestion and helped me up by my hand. We walked through the maze garden and made a stop at the gazebo in the center of the maze.

Vance had me rest on a circular bench of the gazebo. I rested my back against the wall of the gazebo and rested my head against the supporting beam. I placed my right hand over my injury. "You do not seem fine," Vance said as he kneeled in front of me.

"You could always carry me back."

"...Does My Lady plan to incite my mother to hold a wedding for us within a month?"

"I do not think Garett would be very happy with me marrying a man that just kidnapped me."

I do not think that marriage with Vance would be too bad. He is wealthy, strong, and seems easy to control from behind the scenes.

"I do think the kidnapping is the major problem here... My mother seems intent on marrying me to you," Vance said.

"Marrying you is not a bad idea," I said as I sat up straight. "You seem easy to control as a husband."

"Are you not just too manipulative, My Lady?"

"...Perhaps."

I enjoyed joking and laughing with him, but we cannot stay this way forever. We were not meant to meet had it not been for Prince Erik.

I suddenly felt sullen again.

Vance touched my cheek to assure my wellness. He worriedly asked, "Are you alright?"

I removed his hand from my cheek and looked deep into his eyes.

"...Dolton."

"My Lady, why would you call me..."

I flashed him another smile.

"...Dolton," I repeated in a gentler tone.

The gentle mature tone that I had used when I was a Queen caused Vance to widen his eyes.

"... Yes, Your Highness?" he answered me.

"...Now that things have changed, do you forgive yourself a little now?" I asked.

"Huh?"

A tear spilled from his left eye. Placed my hand over his cheek and wiped away his tears with my thumb.

He held my hand that was pressed against his cheek. I looked into his ruby colored eyes and smiled.

"You can fool the world, Prince Erik, and maybe even yourself, but you could never fool your Queen. You have not been able to move on from that day. I thought maybe that you wanted to save Erik because you failed to save him in our first lives. The feeling of saving someone may just be a sense of self gratification. However, saving someone does not mean that you yourself have been saved. Is that not right?" I asked.

"No...The events from the other day as well as the day of your death keep popping up in my dreams as well as the back of my mind. Sometimes I have nightmares that all of this is just a dream and that you and His Highness are still dead because of me," Vance said.

"We are not dead yet," I said as I touched his chest. "The number of wounds you received that day are proof."

The scent of sterilization was overpowering his cologne that he tried to use in order to hide it.

"...I...I was determined to lose my life if it meant that I could protect you two. In the end, you still got hurt despite me being there with you. Even though the incident ended, could that really be called saving you two? What if just another incident happens again? What if it would be my fault again?" he asked.

"Forgiveness is something that we often seek from others because often times the most difficult person to please is ourselves. As your Queen, I will take over that role...I forgive you, Dolton," I said.

He buried his face into his hands as he began crying. I went onto my knees in front of him and cradled his head over my chest. His arms soon wrapped around my body and brought me closer to his embrace. The last person who needed saving was Dolton himself.

I had Vance lay down on the bench and had him rest his head on my lap as I caressed his head.

"Hey, Vance...I want to apologize to you," I said.

"Apologize?" he asked.

"I forced you and your family into making difficult decisions in order to realize my goals. You had to fake your death, lie to your parents, and cut off your relationship with all the people that you were close with. I am such a horrible master," I said solemnly.

"That is not..."

"True? I gave up so much to become the perfect Queen. In the end, I was incompetent as a person. I had to rely on other people like you to get my dirty work done. I am but a weak human who can only live by hurting others. At least...you should be able to make your own life choices. You are not my puppet or slave. It is wrong of me to keep you around like this. Your happiness is the only thing that I cannot give you, I said.

"What do you mean by..."

"You can go back to being Dolton Grass. Your goal was to serve Prince Erik back then, right? You can continue serving him. The only change to your life will be your name and being able to contact all of your past relationships with other people. This includes your family and relatives. It will a bit difficult explaining your false death, but you have my word that I will try to resolve everything as soon as possible for you." "My Queen..."

I placed one finger over his lips.

"Please do not answer me now...If you do, I am sure that you would side with the person coddling you right now. I would be taking advantage of your weakness if I told you to give me an answer this instant," I said.

"...Let me think about it," he said.

"Good answer...Dolton, no matter what your answer is, I was happy that it was you who became my first and last Knight. Thank you for your service," I said with a bright smile.

"It was my honor!"

I ended up being carried back by Vance. When he applied strength during our embrace, he had invigorated my wound as well. With me being in too much pain to walk, he carried me back in his arms for both o his parents to see. His mother was more than ecstatic to see the closeness of our relationship.

"I will be seeing your marriage portrait when I come home," I predicted.

"My apologies..."