Rejected, My Jaded Love
Episode 80

Asher’s Perspective

Jade called me last night, she wanted to speak to me. I tried to keep calm, but I was so excited to hear her voice. I smile thinking back on the phone call.

“Hello?” I answer the phone.

“Asher?” I hear Jade speak. Just hearing my name from her lips gets my heart beating faster.

“Jade? How are you doing? I miss you. I want to get to see you again as soon as you want me to baby. I am there, just telling me when I can come and visit, and I will be there” I say to her quickly as I want to get it all out there in case, she hangs up on me.

“I am ok,” she says and then pauses. “I really miss you too, I am sorry for getting so angry about Ashley, it just felt right then in the moment that you were choosing her over me and it hurt me, again. You already had a relationship with her, and we were just beginning ours and it didn’t feel like you were taking my side in any of it. I felt like you were taking her side, and didn’t believe me like the first time when you assumed that Ashley had been the victim when she and that other girl started going off on me in the dining room that time I met my brothers there. It felt like you had already made up your mind about what was happening without even hearing my side of it, or what I was feeling. I have not been on solid footing for a while now, but I was so hurt by you knowing that we were mates and then not wanting me, it really hurt. I feel like you only want me now because I am in good shape, we could have resolved that if you had come to me when you knew we were mates to see if you would still love me if I was heavy. I don’t have that answer, and I think I would have more faith in what we are going through if I HAD had that to fall back on. So, I KNOW you would love me regardless of where my weight lies Asher” Jade tells me.

“I know I didn’t make it clear what was going on. I just wanted you to be safe first and foremost. I didn’t want anything to do with Ashley after our eyes met. I knew we were mates right then, and I have not wanted or looked at another woman since. I only want you, Jade, you are my mate. I want you with me all the time. I want you to sit on my lap like my mom does with my dad. I want you there for you to calm me in times of stress. I want you to carry my pups, and I look forward to seeing your round belly carrying my pups. I will love you regardless, skinny or belly full of our pups, you are my final answer to what I want in my life. No other girl will do, the Goddess gave you to me for a reason and I will fight for you baby. I am sorry I didn’t make you understand what I needed to do and see, to verify what Ashley had done so I could banish her from my pack. It is very serious business, and I didn’t want to allow any room for her to try to weasel back into my pack. She is devious and I know if we left any grey area, she would be able to replace a way back into our pack and I didn’t want her to be able to come back, for any reason. I do not want her around you to try to cause any doubts in your mind or to try to come between us again. I do not want her, she was only a means to an end for me, when I needed a release from the stress that I was under. I never had any feelings for her at all. I only want you. It hurt me so much when Bree told me that you said to just move on and replace another girl, or to be with Ashley. I don’t and won’t want any of them because they are not YOU. In my mind you are perfection, no matter what size you are, if you want to gain weight, I am good with it. If you want to lose weight. I am good with it. I love you, Jade, no matter what size you are. I don’t know how to tell you how much you mean to me. I just want to show you over and over again. Maybe I can come to visit you this weekend after we get Eric’s pack taken care of? We can have a proper date alone together and get to know each other. I want to see you so bad. You make me want to be a better man for you and our children. Someone that you and they can look up to, depend on, and love. Please give me the opportunity to prove to you how much you truly mean to me Jade, because I don’t think you know how I feel about you, and I would like to spend the rest of my life showing you” I tell her.

I hear quiet crying on the phone line and am worried because I cannot see her face and I don’t know if she is crying because she is about to try to reject me? Or if she is actually going to give me another chance? I start praying to the Moon Goddess herself for her to please show Jade how much I love her and want her.

“Jade, are you ok baby?” I ask her, but I get no response, I just keep hearing her low crying.

“Baby, please stop crying, I am sorry if you feel I failed you. I will do anything to fix it. Tyler says I can go with them tomorrow and my plan is to kill Eric, and Kyle if I see him, for wanting to put their dirty hands on you. I will protect you and take care of you baby. I don’t want you to ever have to worry again about having to look over your shoulder in fear because we are going to take care of this tomorrow. And I will personally take care of Ashley as soon as I get back from the Howling Wolf pack” I tell her.

“I love you too Asher, that is why it hurt me so badly. I will give you another opportunity because I want to be with you and live the rest of my life with you. I let the stressful week I had with; accepting the rejection, going to the lake and the incident on the Sandbar, seeing you get kissed by Ashley which really was the worst part, as I would have rather gone through what Eric and Kyle did again than see her hands and lips on you and then being embarrassed at the restaurant as they should have been a private conversation in the back yard of our rental house and not for everyone else at the tables around us. I know my friends, and my family, and your family, also participated in it, but I asked everyone to stop and you as the one who is mated to me and should love me the most, should have been ok with that. Almost getting kidnapped by Kyle and Eric, and the disgusting comments Kyle made in my ear and Eric taking my bike keys to keep me from leaving, Ashley claiming to be pregnant, and then the plans that Eric and Kyle were making for me. It was sickening and disgusting. I just couldn’t take any more on me, it was too much and then it seemed like you were not believing that Ashley could have done anything wrong when she had clearly shown us all that not only could she, but she was totally ok in doing so. Eric climbed into the bathroom while I was trying to take a shower. That was so frightening to me. It was the last straw for me, and I broke, I couldn’t stop shaking or crying at that point. I just wanted to lick my wounds and distance myself from you to try to stop the heartbreak that was working through me. I didn’t want to be rejected when you finally decided that I really wasn’t good enough for you, just like you had already decided that when you went into my room and knew I was your mate, but you didn’t want me enough to come to me. That broke my heart, Asher. I needed some space to think with my head and not my heart. Because I knew if I was with you for very much longer the bond between us would prevent me from leaving you. I also needed to feel safe, and with Ashley still belonging to your pack and worrying that she could sneak in someone to take me, which at the time was an actual option, the only logical option was to come to my dad’s pack. I do feel safe here. I hope that this whole thing will be over soon, so I will have the freedom to go where I need to go, and not have to hide out here at the pack instead of being able to go into town. I just don’t want anyone getting hurt trying to protect me. That would make me feel awful Asher, I am so worried for you tomorrow” Jade tells me.

“I will be fine, Jade. Braxton and Mason will be there along with 100 of our warriors. They don’t expect us, and we should be able to get this done quickly with no lives lost on our end. I am actually a very skilled fighter and Eric will be taken care of, Jade, I promise you that. But if I do get hurt, I would be glad for you to come over and k**s any of my injuries to make me feel better” I tell Jade, with a smile in my tone so she knows that I am flirting with her.

“Asher,” Jade says with a low hiss like she was embarrassed that I had said it to her.

I laugh lowly and say, “What? Is that a problem my lovely, Jade? How about a k**s on your beautiful lips then?” I continue to flirt with her, smiling into the phone.

“I will give you a k**s when you come back safely,” Jade says to me, and I cannot contain my surprise or my happiness at hearing what she said.

I lay back on my pillow and look at the clock, it is midnight, I need to get some rest before tomorrow, so I will think about our call later on. I think the tides are finally turning in my favor and I want to get this fight with the Howling Wolf pack over with quickly so I can see my Jade. I turn onto my side and try to go to sleep. I need to be up at 430 to get ready to go at 5 when they get here. I fall asleep with a smile on my face.