“You’re telling me that he paid all the bills, got them out of the old apartment, and got my mother a job?”
Ray nods. “He also compensated me pretty handsomely. Quite the generous fellow.”
I kick him from under the table, and he groans.
“Can you two pipe down? I’m trying to do a livestream,” Laura snaps from the living area.
“Isn’t it too early for a livestream?”
“Isn’t it too early to be in my business?”
I sigh tiredly. “Turns out that all she needed to be a nuisance was a full stomach.”
“I cannot believe you!” I cry, kicking him from underneath the table.
“What did I do wrong?” he cries.
“One job Ray, one fucking job! I asked you to look after my family.”
“And I did just that,” he answers fiercely. “They’re in one piece, aren’t they?”
“You let Antonio get to them.”
“And you act like that’s a bad thing,” he whispers. “Your mother isn’t struggling with a bad back anymore. She has a job, and she can take care of your sister.”
“That would have happened without Antonio. I told you I was going to come back. It was just two fucking months, and you couldn’t just hang on.”
Ray inhales. “Do you want to know what happened in those two months?”
“I don’t care. I asked—”
“Your mother was so sick that she had to get admitted to the hospital.”
His words hit me like a hammer.
“I spent every dime you gave me, and I had to pick up a part-time job. Laura had to—” he sighs. “She had to scrub filthy toilets to make measly change for groceries.”
“I know it must have been hard.”
He laughs manically. “Hard? You have got to be kidding me. After two weeks, the hospital kicked your mother out, and she had to depend on cheap pain meds to get a wink of sleep. Laura stayed up by her side every night—mind you, the poor thing was scrubbing toilets all morning and afternoon.”
Tears sting my eyes.
“Then the bills, lord the fucking bills. How many times did that poor girl have to turn off her phone and ignore the creditors calling?”
His eyes are brilliant with traces of tears. “Pray tell, what were you up to while your family was starving and struggling?”
“I tried Ray, I did.”
“Did you, Alyssa?”
I swear that I did.
“I don’t care what you or anyone thinks. Antonio came in like an angel sent by God himself, and he gave this family hope.” Ray gets up. “Settle your shit with him but don’t pull your family into it. They’ve been through enough.”
He calls out to Laura to say goodbye before leaving without another glance in my direction.
I bow my head and drop it onto the kitchen table.
“Now do you get it?” Laura says from behind me. She walks up to the gigantic fridge and pulls out a bottle of water.
“I thought that you were on a livestream,” I say, taking the water she hands to me.
She shrugs. “It turns out you are right. It’s a bit too early to do a livestream.”
I wipe my tears and gulp down the water.
“He’s wrong.” She pauses as I look at her. “Nothing that happened was your fault.”
I chuckle in pain. “I wasn’t there for you and Mom! I should never have gone with those men.”
“That’s all true—but it would be plain unfair to forget that the only reason you went with them was to save mom and I.”
I blink away tears. “When did you grow so wise?” I tease.
“You’ll be surprised how much time you get for some sober reflection, when half your peers know you as the toilet girl. Girls are ruthless.”
The tears come, and I tilt my head back. “You must have suffered a lot. I’m sorry.”
She nods. “Yes, Mama and I suffered, but it wasn’t the physical pain that tortured us the most. It was you being away that killed us the most.”
I sob as the words leave her mouth.
“Mom wasn’t laid up because of the pain in her back. She was laid up because of the pain in her heart.” Laura swallows. “I have always wondered why I didn’t have the courage to go in your place.”
“I would never have let you do that.”
Tears drop from her eyes. “Alyssa, Antonio didn’t just give us money. He gave us hope. He promised us that you were alive and well and that someday we would see you.”
“He did?”
“Looking back, it was stupid to believe him so easily. But Ray promised us that he was a man of his word, and if he said you were alive and well, you were.”
I fight to wipe away my tears, but they keep flowing.
“You suffered too, didn’t you?” Laura asks.
Slowly, I nod.
She reaches over the table and then takes my hands.
“Then let’s not suffer anymore.”
She inhales. “I decided that I want to go to college.”
“Laura, that’s—that’s wonderful,” I say between sobs.
“Mom had this exact reaction. You both are so lame,” she grins.
I sniff.
“Between her job and Antonio’s monthly stipends, Mom has enough saved up for part of the cost of college for me. She has a decent job. Ray helped us make some promising investments, and Mom might be able to buy her own house eventually.”
Laura squeezes my hands. “Even without Antonio, Mom, and I are in the clear. We don’t have to be poor ever again.” Her eyes light up. “Don’t you see it, Alyssa? We’re finally free. You don’t have to be around nasty men all day. You can stay home all day or go out and have fun. You can finally make friends, replace love—anything.”
The word love strikes a wound in my heart.
“You, Mama, and I can finally live in peace.”
She gets up and hugs me from behind. I caress her arms.
“We don’t have to suffer anymore. We can finally breathe.”
She breathes in audibly, and when I try to follow suit, I feel a strong restriction.
The door opens, and our mother walks in.
“Wipe your face,” Laura whispers.
I wipe my tears, and I sit up straighter.
“You girls are a bit too quiet. No more fighting, I hope,” my mother says as Laura relieves her of the paper bags full of groceries in her arms.
Laura is right. Mom does look better. Her thin arms have more flesh on them, her eyes aren’t so hollow, and they have a twinkle of hope.
I grin and pull out a chair for her.
“Now, why would I ever fight with my favorite sister?” I ask.
Mama stops and peers at my face.
“Your eyes are bloodshot, sweetie? Have you been crying?”
“It’s probably the pollen. She was out a few minutes ago,” Laura answers hurriedly for me.
I nod. “What she said, Mama.”
“Did you get my favorite chips?” Laura asks before Mama can scan my face more.
I settle into my chair and listen as my mother shares the story of her day.
Laura is right. For the first time in our lives, we are in the clear.
I have nothing to worry about, and I can live the rest of my life happily. But with his child in my womb—well, that complicates everything for me.
The night falls, and I settle into bed restlessly.
I pull out my phone and dial Giovanni’s number.
“This better be good,” he blurts out, surprisingly picking up after the first ring.
“I—I just wanted to say that I am back with my family now.”
“And why am I supposed to care about this?”
I swallow. “I can’t kill Antonio anymore.”
“Well, good for you—or sad that you can’t do that. I don’t give a fuck—nice doing business with you.”
The line clicks abruptly, and there is silence.
I throw the phone against the wall, and it smashes into pieces.
“Laura, mom and I,” I whisper to myself. “My real family.”
I begin to feel a tingle in my stomach, and I rush into the bathroom just in time to barf.
I fall weakly to the floor with my head resting on the edge of the toilet. I fall into a restless slumber.
A sharp gasp replaces its way into my subconscious and drags me into wakefulness.
I open my eyes to see Laura looking down at me in horror.
I shoot up and place my hands over her mouth before she has the chance to make more noise.
“You’ll bring Mom down here!” I whisper.
I wait for her to relax when I finally move my hands.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” She asks.
“No cursing.”
“You passed out, Alyssa!”
“I just fell asleep!”
“There is no way. Are you pregnant or something?”
I swallow and look away.
Horror reads in her eyes, and she clasps her own hands over her mouth this time. “You—you’re pregnant.”
“You can’t tell Mom.”
She looks at me helplessly. “Alyssa—”
“I know you have so many questions, and I owe you and Mom answers. I promise I’ll do all that when I return.”
She turns as I walk out of the bathroom.
“And where are you going?”
I inhale. “I need to speak to the father of my child.”
And like a calf going back to its slaughter, I get dressed. Laura reluctantly helps me to pack a small bag of clothes, and I slip out of the house.
My destination?
Back to Antonio.
I feel like I’m moving through a dream as I see the gigantic gates that held me hostage.
I pay the Uber driver, and I walk up to the gates.
The guards block my path as I step up, and I sigh.
“I want to see Viper.”
“You can’t.”
I tighten my lips. “Antonio won’t be happy if he replaces out that you turned me away.”
The guards speak amongst themselves, and they let me through.
“This has to be a joke. What on earth are you doing here?” Donatello calls as he sees me appear.
I speed up as I walk toward him. “I want to see Antonio.”
“Sorry, he is a little busy. You both can catch up some other time, you conniving little snake.”
His words stop me in my tracks.
“You thought we wouldn’t replace out about your calls to Giovanni?”
“I need to see Antonio,” I say, walking past him.
“I don’t want to get vicious with you. It’s going to be a messy couple of hours, and as much as I truly cannot stand you, I don’t want you caught in the middle.”
I keep walking, and Donatello grabs my hands. “I wouldn’t do that if were you,” he says.
I pull my hands away.
“Let her go,” a familiar voice orders.
Donatello sighs, releasing my hands at his brother’s demand.
“What do you want? Why are you here?” Antonio inquires.
I turn slowly, and when I see his face, every shred of dignity within me melts away.
For some reason, he is shirtless. I’ve only been away for three days, but the sight of him is making me feel excited, sad, and desperate all at once. His chest is glistening with sweat. He’s been working hard on something.
“Cat got your tongue?” Donatello snaps sarcastically.
I swear I want to speak, but Antonio’s intense gaze renders me speechless.
“Guard the gates. Take some men with you. I’ll handle her,” he orders Donatello.
“Antonio, we can’t have her here. It’s too dangerous,” Donatello protests.
“I’ll handle it. Go guard the gates,” Antonio repeats firmly. Donatello glares at me before he leaves us.
“Antonio—” I begin.
“Leave while you still can. I don’t think we have anything else to say to each other,” he interrupts, turning and walking back into the house.
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