Silent Desires (Shattered Silence Duet Book 1)
Silent Desires: Chapter 30

I spent all day scared out of my mind, wondering what nightmare I’d face tonight. As time went on, I became more and more nervous. Now it’s dark out, and I’m trying to stop myself from completely freaking out, waiting for the sound of that basement door to open.

When it finally happens, it isn’t a loud bang like I’ve been expecting. Instead, it’s the creepy creak of the door being pushed open slowly. I see his feet and legs as he slowly comes down the stairs, like he has all the time in the world. My fists clench in fear when he comes fully into view. He stands at the bottom of the steps and extends his arm out to me.

“Come along, my pet. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

The thought of getting clean is enticing, but he’ll only dirty me up worse than I am now if I let him. I stay seated on my mattress and pull my legs tighter against me.

He frowns at me. “You know better than to not listen to me, Mina. One more chance to come willingly. If I have to come over there and drag you upstairs, you will not enjoy it. Is that what you want?”

Dammit. Knowing I can’t avoid what’s coming, I slowly stand up on shaky legs and walk to him, keeping my eyes on the floor. When I get close, he reaches for my hand and drags me upstairs after him. I can’t stop the tears that escape. All I can hope is that it’s over with quickly, but with the knowledge of this being an all night event makes that hope quickly dwindle and die before it takes root.

When we reach the main floor, he takes us through the living room, which I’ve never been in before. I can’t help but take a quick glance around. There’s a small brown sofa and recliner, both facing a small tv. Beer bottles and cigarettes litter the coffee table, along with some torn up magazines. Simon leads me to a set of stairs leading up to the second floor. My breathing starts to pick up again as we start to ascend.

“Calm down, pet. I’m just going to take you to the bathroom so you can clean up, okay?” Simon says, sounding exasperated. If he doesn’t like my hesitation now, just wait until we reach the bedroom. I don’t think playing possum is an option for me anymore, and I’m not sure what that will mean for me.

I don’t respond, but knowing I’m going to the bathroom right now, and not the bedroom, does help my breathing ease up a fraction. When we reach the top of the stairs, I see four doors, and he leads me into the last one, which is a large bathroom.

“Take your clothes off,” he instructs.

I look at him with wide eyes and wrap my arms around my chest in self preservation.

He glares at me, and I see his fists clench at his sides. “What did I say about doing as you’re told?”

My body shakes, unsure what to do. He’s my brother, this is wrong.

His hand rushes out and grabs my bad arm, his thumb pressing into my wound. My mouth opens in a silent scream as my knees buckle beneath me.

My tears fall heavily as I watch the evil smile spread across his face. He enjoys seeing me struggling with my pain. I guess my mother hadn’t forgotten my wound after all, obviously telling him about it.

“Have I ever told you how much I love that you have no voice? I don’t have to worry about anyone hearing your screams. Mother should have done that to you five years sooner.”

Tears fall in steady streams now. The pain is awful, making my stomach roll with nausea.

“Are you going to listen now?” he asks, tilting his head as he considers me.

I nod, and he slowly lets go. I pull my arm towards my chest as I slowly get to my feet. He gives me an expectant look. Unwilling to endure any more pain right now, I turn away from him and take off my clothes. I don’t even bother wiping my tears away, there are too many falling now.

I hear him start the shower and take a deep breath. “All right, get in and wash yourself,” he tells me. I sense him leaning against the shower, waiting for me. If he’s telling me to wash myself, I hope that at least means he won’t be joining me in there, giving me a few more minutes without his hands on me.

I haven’t had a shower in years—over a decade, I think—and I won’t even be able to enjoy it. I don’t waste any time, instantly getting under the spray, which is a fraction too cold. When I go to adjust the temperature, he calls out, “don’t.” making me freeze in fear. When he doesn’t speak again, I pull my hand back from the faucet.

The shower is a tub with a clear curtain, and I know he can see me, so I keep my back to him as much as possible. I replace the soap and run it all over my body as fast as I can. It’s not enjoyable, given my current audience, but the water and soap do feel nice. I use the shampoo to wash my hair, and that feels even better.

As I’m rinsing the shampoo out with my head tilted back, I’m suddenly wrapped in the curtain, water pouring in from the top. I splutter as I’m pelted with water. Simon’s trapped me in the shower curtain with his arms, submerging me under the shower head. The water has no easy place to drain around my head, so it builds up over my face, only a trickle making it down my body.

I don’t even have time to take a breath before I realize what’s going on. I cough and choke, swallowing some of the water. Finally, after I’m sure he’s trying to drown me, he lets go and pushes the curtain aside. I bend over, coughing out the water and vomiting into the tub as I try to breathe. My throat burns as I try to take in a full lung full of air.

I’m grabbed by my hair and throat, and pulled upright. My eyes shoot open, my hands grabbing his as I watch his evil face loom over me. He forces me back, so the water hits my face again and I splutter, unable to breathe with the water pouring over me.

“Downstairs, you didn’t come when I asked you to. Then you disobeyed my command to get undressed. I want to make it very clear to you how tonight is going to go,” he whispers angrily into my ear. I cough, struggling to breathe properly.

“When I give you an order, you will obey, straight away and without reservation. Every time you don’t, I will add a punishment to your list. When I figure out which part of tonight you hate the most, I will do it again for each time you disobey. Do you understand?” he asks, anger rolling through his voice.

I nod as best I can in his grasp. He lets me go and switches the water off. I cough and spit out more water, gasping for breath. After a minute, I’m finally able to take in full lungfuls of air, despite my burning throat.

He tosses a towel at me. I quickly grab it, wrapping it around myself instantly.

“Dry off, then meet me in the bedroom across the hall.”

He gives me one last glare, as if warning me not to disobey, then leaves, walking across the hall and leaving both doors open. I stare after him, taking deep breaths.

I’ve decided I hate showers and never want another one in my life. I’ll be happy to continue bathing in the sink for the rest of my life.

My eyes don’t move from the door way he entered. How am I supposed to just walk across the hall to him, like a lamb to the slaughter? I can’t. I know what he said, but wouldn’t it be worse if I didn’t resist at all? How could I live with myself if I just lay back and let him rape me? Because I’m sure that’s what’s coming. Even if I deserve this, I have to do everything I can to evade it, even if it ends in the worst beating of my life. Even if he kills me for it.

I wrap the towel around myself and tuck in the end so it stays up under my arms on its own. I have no plan, no real way of escaping, but the longer I stand here, the more I start freaking out.

“Little pet, I’m waiting,” he calls out impatiently. The sound of his voice spurs me into action… and I run.

He must be waiting near the bedroom door, just out of sight, because I don’t even make it to the top of the stairs before he tackles me. The impact pushes me into a door of one of the other bedrooms, making a huge bang as we hit it, and it hits the wall. We fall to the floor in a heap and I squirm, trying to get out from underneath him, but he stands up, easily dragging me with him, his chest pressed against my back.

I reach up blindly behind me, trying to use my nails to hurt him. They make contact, and he yells, “Fuck, you stupid little bitch!” I’m thrown against a dresser. It hits me in the side, and I think I hear something crack before I fall to the floor, winded and clutching my side in pain as I gasp for air.

He moves to stand over me as I pant heavily from exertion and pain. “I told you what would happen if you disobeyed. I guess we’re gonna have some fun now.” He smiles, reaching down to grab one of my ankles and dragging me out of the room.

I kick with my other foot, but he just grabs that ankle, too. I try to replace something to grab onto, but there’s nothing within reach. I want to scream, I try to scream, but nothing comes out. I struggle against his grip, squirming and grabbing onto furniture and the doorway as he drags me, trying to make it as hard as possible for him to take me to where he wants me.

“Fuck, when did you get so scrappy, little pet?” He laughs like he’s enjoying this. Then I remember—he does love it. It’s the reason I stopped reacting to him.

I stopped fighting him years ago, and it broke me. I feel like I’ve been broken for years, but now—now I don’t want to be broken anymore. I see something better, seven somethings better. And I want to grab that feeling and hold it close. I don’t want this, even if I do deserve it.

I manage to pull one leg free and immediately drive it into his crotch as hard as I can. “Shit!” He bends over, releasing my ankle to clutch himself, and I use the opportunity to kick him in the face. I don’t think I do much damage—I’m not strong, and I’m in a bad position—but it’s enough to let me scramble backwards.

He looks up and glares at me. “You’re gonna pay for that, you fucking bitch!” He starts to stand up, taking a step toward me, when we hear the doorbell ring. We freeze, staring at each other. My eyes are wide with terror, and he looks angry, frustrated, and… worried.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. Whoever’s at the door seems anxious to get in. Maybe a neighbor heard our fight? A seed of hope blooms in my chest at that chance of being rescued. I hear the door being opened downstairs as I try to control my breathing, taking a big, deep breath, wishing more than ever that I had a voice to scream for help with.

Simon looks at me and slowly smiles, realizing I have no way to yell for help.

“Good evening, ma’am. We’re from Ultra Power. Sorry to bug you, but there’s been a power flux in the area, and we see you’ve been affected. If you can just give us access to your fuse box, we can get you up and running in no time.”

As I glance around, I notice, for the first time, that there are no lights on up here. I hadn’t noticed they’d gone out until now. I glance at the hall and see it’s indeed dark out there.

“Alright, but I’m awfully busy. If you could be quick?” my mother replies in a huff.

“Of course, just point the way.”

I can’t help but notice how much the voice sounds like Dom’s. But it’s not quite the same. Fuck, I wish he was here right now. I wipe my eyes, trying to clear away the tears so I can see clearly, afraid any moment Simon will grab me again.

“This way,” my mother’s voice rings out.

We hear the noise of a few doors and footsteps, then what sounds like someone running upstairs. Simon finally moves to the door, away from me, and I crawl backward so my back is against the wall in the bedroom. I hear my mother in the hall. “They’re in the basement, you need to get out of here, now. Nobody can see you here,” she whisper-yells at him.

He glances over at me. “See you later, pet,” he smiles and gives me a wink, then I hear him run down the stairs and out the door.

My mother steps into the room and sees me cowering against the wall. “Useless piece of trash,” she sighs and shakes her head. “Stay here and be quiet, and I’ll send you downstairs with food and a fresh change of clothes.” I nod quickly. It’s the best offer I’ve ever received from her, and I’m not sure why she’s offering it.

She leaves and goes back downstairs and I stay where I am with my arms wrapped around my knees. Eventually, I see the lights flick back on, then hear footsteps coming back up to the main floor.

“Alright, you’re all set, ma’am. You want us to make sure all your power is restored properly? We could check the power in each room?” he asks.

“No, you’ve done quite enough interrupting my evening with your power outage. Please leave me to my movie now,” she tells them in frustration.

“Have a good evening, ma’am,” he says, and I hear the door shut.

A minute later, I hear her softly call up the stairs. “Mina, come get your food and clothes, and then head downstairs. You have two minutes.” She tells me gruffly.

I get up, grab my discarded clothes from the bathroom, then head downstairs. When I get to the kitchen, she hasn’t set out any food for me, so I open the cupboard and grab the first things I see—a granola bar and a bag of chips. I open the fridge, see a bottle of water and a yogurt, grab both, then notice the clothes on the counter. It’s my school uniform, freshly cleaned. I grab the pile of clothes and go downstairs. Occasionally, she has to do some laundry for me, especially now that I’m in school. I need my uniform kept clean, or people will notice.

When I get downstairs, I grab Jasper’s hoodie and pull it straight on my naked body, replaceing a pair of thin sleep shorts to pull on as well. Then I switch on my phone and smile as it lights up with multiple missed messages from my friends.