Speak To Me
Chapter 84 –

(Gabriella)

I plopped down on the couch, my body going limp as Jamie quickly scooped me up and let out a soft chuckle.

"Th-that went h-horrible." I muttered before burying my face into the crook of Jamie's neck.

"I know..but let's give him some time. Remember how pissed off I was at first?" Jamie reassured, making me nod as I looped my arms and legs around him tightly.

Jamie started carrying me over to our room, and my body instantly grew tired...I felt like that whole situation just drained me completely.

"I didn't like the way he defended Regina like that though. How he still is painting this whole fucking situation lightly." Jamie added, making me stiffen as I couldn't help but feel a little hurt.

I won't lie, it did sting when he defended her..I mean..I know she is dead and everything..and it was tragic how it happened. But she wasn't a very nice person, as hard as that is for me to admit.

I try so hard to see some type of good in all people..that was how I got through the abuse..holding onto whatever good I could..but with Regina, I could never think of a single one.

I would even go as far as saying the good thing was that she made my Daddy happy..but that was a far stretch.

Now, seeing how easily he jumps to defend her..it hurts...and how she might even be involved in my mother's death makes me mad.

"Princess, I think you need to tell your dad about all of the abuse. I know for a fact that the article that came out just skimmed the surface. He needs to know the extent. Even I don't know all of it, I'm sure..." Jamie spoke softly as I felt my chest swelling with emotion.

Jamie is right..he doesn't know all of it..but I don't want to say all of it. The abuse I received was something I didn't quite understand..a part of me believed it was normal and that I deserved those punishments. How could I know any different, it was all I ever knew..

I was an outsider..a mistake made by my father and mother that stained the Kensington name. I thought if I took the abuse, that maybe I would earn my place in this family..that they would eventually get out all of that hatred they had for me and have nothing left..but it was never ending..it was pure evil.

"I d-dont know if I-I c-c-could say it." I stuttered, prompting Jamie to start rubbing my back in a comforting motion.

"Well..you said you used to write your dad letters..right?" Jamie asked and I nodded my head before pulling back and looking up into his eyes.

"Maybe that's what you can do baby, write him a letter. Tell him exactly how you feel and the abuse you went through."

I guess I never even thought of doing that...

Jamie was right, that might be the best idea.

"Come on, let's get you in the bath." Jamie whispered, his hands starting to pull at my shirt as he began stripping me naked.

"Oh, by the way, my mom sent me a text and wanted to steal you away tomorrow. To go replace a dress for the charity event." Jamie informed me.

We were now in the bath and he was washing my back gently.

"T-t-tomorrow?" I asked, turning my head and peering back at him.

"Yeah, I have a couple of meetings I need to go to. Will you be okay with just my mom? Obviously Ray will be joining you as well.." He added the last part as I quickly turned in his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Y-yes..th-thank you b-baby." I cooed, pressing into him deeply as I began feathering soft kisses along his jaw line.

I was surprised Jamie agreed to this..maybe now that we know Grant isn't a threat, he will be a lot more lenient on me going out.

"Tomorrow I want you to pick whatever dress you like..I want you to feel like the princess you are." He mumbled, my palms dragging down his chest as a shiver trembled through him.

I dipped my hands beneath the water, gripping Jamie's cock as he let out a sharp gasp, making me smirk.

"Fuck..Gabriella, if you start doing that you are going to make me lose control." Jamie growled, causing my smirk to widen as I tightened my grip.

"I l-like when y-you lose c-control." I breathed, and that was all it took..the next thing I knew, Jamie had my core hovering above his long hard cock.

"Be nice and loud for me baby..I need to hear you scream." Jamie gritted through his teeth before slamming me down, making me do just that.

After our bath, Jamie got me dressed and went to his office, taking care of a few work things.

That's when I decided to sit down and do what Jamie suggested earlier. I took out a piece of paper and a pen, my heart racing as I began writing out everything I felt.

I wrote about the times I felt so unwanted..so unloved that I almost enjoyed the attention I would get from being punished..it was the only interaction I would have with my supposed family. I spoke about how I wanted to tell my dad so badly but I was afraid he would get rid of me for causing problems.

I never truly felt like I belonged until I met Jamie..I never felt like I had a purpose and wasn't sure why I was even born to begin with. I began believing those things they told me..I truly thought just maybe I was a mistake.

Tears fell onto the paper, splattering across the ink as I poured my heart and soul out. I felt a part of me breaking inside before mending back together as all of my pain and hurt was finally being released..it was healing..

I stared down, my eyes scanning all of the words that I had written down, and reread them over and over again.

Then I started to realize some things that I didn't before..I felt abandoned by my Dad..and my mom..I felt like I wasn't loved and when I was, it was out of pitty.

Did my dad ever really love me? Wouldn't he have known I was being abused if he did? Wouldn't he have seen how badly I was hurting? Or maybe I just wished he would've..

I slowly rose from the chair. My hand trembling as I reached for the paper and folded it gently.

I slipped it inside of an envelope and took a deep steadying breath. I knew Jamie had been watching me, I felt him hovering behind me a few times but I was so deep into expressing myself that I hadn't responded..so when I turned and saw him standing there, I wasn't surprised. "Would you like me to go with you?" He asked, prompting me to shake my head no as I gripped the letter tighter.

"I b-better do th-this on m-my own." I said shakily, making Jamie's brow furrow as he let out a sigh. I know it was hard on him to not be there with me..but I really did need to do this alone.

"Okay..I will start making dinner for us." He stated, placing a kiss agaisnt my forehead.

I turned away from him, walking towards my dad's room as I felt my heart hammering in my chest. I know this might not be the best time to do this..but I felt like I can't hold it in any longer.. I need to start healing with or without my dad..and this right here was going to decide what path I take.