Stone Cold Notes: A Rock Star Romance (The Seasons Change)
Stone Cold Notes: Chapter 21

I’D BEEN AWAKE FOR A WHILE, watching my sweet little bird sleeping in my bed. Wren clutched the sheets under her chin, her pale brows furrowed. Even in her sleep, she had a lot going on in her mind.

She was a beautiful sight to wake up to. This way, I could take my time perusing her. First, I studied the copper hair spread on her pillow. The silky strands of gold, red, and orange swirling together to make the prettiest color I’d ever seen. Her lashes were long and blonde, fanning out on her cheeks, which were dotted with light copper freckles. Her brows were the same color as her lashes. But it was a secret only I knew, because during the day, she wore makeup to darken them both. I liked knowing I was one of the few who’d seen her this way.

Fuck knew she was the only one who’d seen most sides of me. Wren was inside me, had been for a long, long time.

My years of watching her from a distance had never prepared me for what it was to know Wren up close. Weekly reports on her activities didn’t tell me what her skin would feel like under mine. That she smiled in the last moments before she fell asleep. That she murmured in her sleep but never moved from the position she started in. Those reports I received were the surface of her, they were not who Wren was.

This girl in my bed was the real. She was the Wren from her letters times a thousand. If I’d given us a chance, I would have fallen for her without our history.

The fact was, I never would have given her a chance. We wouldn’t be here if not for our letters. We’d still be history if I hadn’t started watching her. If I hadn’t interfered in her life from afar, all that we were building wouldn’t exist.

If I was asked whether I felt guilty for not cluing Wren in on all I’d done for her and the time I’d spent watching her, I’d answer no. Without qualms or hesitation. Wren was mine, and I was hers. How we got here didn’t matter. What mattered was I’d rip apart the very fabric of the universe with my bare hands and reshape it if I had to in order to keep her.

Amber eyes fluttered open, and when they focused on me, her small, pink lips tipped into a grin. “Stalker.”

I combed the hair from her sleepy face. “You like it.”

She let go of the sheet and scooted into my arms. “Maybe I do.”

“I like wakin’ up to you, Wren.”

She tucked her face in my throat, but I felt her smile. “I like it too, Callum. Everything about it except knowing it has to end.”

My hands roamed her warm little body, naked under the sheet. I couldn’t get enough of the soft slope of her belly or the dramatic curve of her hip. I liked to trace those rounded lines over and over, sometimes with my fingers, others with my tongue. Wren protested once when I touched her stomach, but only once. I made her understand there was nothing about her I didn’t replace sexy. Fuck, I spent my days apart from her half hard picturing what she looked like when she rode me or how her ass moved when I took her from behind. There was no hiding that body from me. It was scored into my memory for all time.

“You need to hurry home, or can I keep you here a little while longer?” I slid my fingers along her slit, her legs opening to give me access.

“Seeing as it’s the ass crack of dawn, I think we have time.” She nipped at my neck. “I’m a little sore, though, baby.”

I rolled her onto her back and slid my nose along hers. Her cheeks were flushed already, just from the idea of me inside her.

“I can go slow.” I pecked her nose. “I’ll be gentle and take care of you.”

Her breath came out in a gasp. That was it. The promise of taking care of her was all it took to turn my little bird on and get her ready for me.

I took my time with her, my sleepy girl. Her skin was so warm and soft in the morning, I couldn’t keep my mouth off it. By the time I slid inside her, she was pliant and soaked. Her arms wrapped around me as best they could from beneath me. I cradled her head to my chest and went slower than I ever had with her.

And I thought, this was what I wanted my mornings to be like. All my mornings. Watching my beautiful girl, then having her. Making slow, lazy love until we were smiling and happy and filled up to face whatever the rest of the day had in store. Even if it was media bullshit, work hassles, a grumpy kid, any of it. This would fortify us.

I needed this.

“Callum,” she whispered. “You feel so good.”

I kissed her forehead and cheek, held her close, slid in and out with gentle ease. Her plush thighs anchored my hips to her, and the rest of her body arched into mine.

“Need you, Little Bird. All the time.”

“I need you too,” she answered.

We went on like that, fucking slow, whispering, holding one another, until it became too much. Too good. I rocked into her harder, and she took it, raising her hips. I never stopped holding her, even as I drove into her with force. She was wrapped around me, kissing the skin she could reach, sighing and moaning my name.

When I came, she did too, and it was something else entirely. We got lost together, writhing like one body, clutching onto each other as we flew high. God, she was beautiful when she came. Nothing better than Wren letting herself go and having not one care in the world.

After, we showered and got dressed. She frowned at me when all I wore was a pair of sweats, telling me I’d catch my death from the cold. My little bird wore a sweater that was so long, it almost reached her knees, fleece leggings, and thick, fuzzy socks. I liked it because she looked sweet, but also because her sweater kept slipping off her shoulder and I got to kiss that bare skin when it did.

I made bacon and toast for breakfast. Wren chopped up strawberries and bananas. She couldn’t sit still and let me serve her. I got it, her instinctive need to take care, so I didn’t complain even though I wanted to give her the morning off.

We sat side by side at the counter eating our breakfast. This was our first time doing that, and it drove a small stake through my chest thinking it might be a long while before we could again. That just wasn’t fucking acceptable to me.

I tossed my toast down and wiped my mouth with my napkin. Probably sensing the sudden change in me, Wren stopped eating and swiveled in her chair to look at me.

“I need to wake up with you. This has to happen more often.” My brow pinched. “I won’t ask for every night yet, even though that’s what I want, but I need you in my bed or me in your bed at least every weekend.”

“Um…” Her eyes darted around. Her fingers twisted in her sweater. “I really can’t ask Jenny to watch Ezra overnight every weekend. It wouldn’t be fair to her, but I also don’t want to leave him so often. That’s not to say I don’t want to sleep with you. I have loved everything about last night and this morning. It’s just more complicated than that.”

“So don’t ask Jenny. Bring Ezra with you.”

She flinched, like the idea was so surprising, it had hit her like a physical slap. “Really? You’d want him here?”

“Of course. If it means havin’ you here, hell yes.”

“I’ll have to think about it. I mean, where would he even sleep? He’s particular and—”

I took her hand and pulled her off the stool, tugging her through the living room, down the hall, to the first bedroom, two away from mine. I pushed the door open, then I pushed Wren inside. I followed, wrapping my arms around her shoulders from behind and resting my chin on her head.

“He’ll sleep in here.”

The room was sparsely decorated, but it was painted pale blue, with a full-size bed in the center. A matching nightstand held a lamp that looked like a globe. A framed picture of the last TSC album was hung above the bed. Striped blackout curtains draped from rods over the window.

“Wow, okay. This is a really nice room. I’m not sure how he’d feel, but—”

I covered her mouth. “Don’t say no. Not yet. Our morning is goin’ too well for me to hear you say no. If he needs to get comfortable here, bring him over to hang out. I’ll pick up some toys, fuckin’ PAW Patrol and the like, make it a cool place to hang, and see what he thinks. I know you two come as a package, and I’m gonna do everything in my power to earn that package. Hopefully with a sexy little bow on your half.”

She laughed behind my hand, then twisted in my arms to face me. “I’m going to cry, baby.” Her eyes were shining like that was true. “That is incredibly thoughtful and sweet. Ezra would completely dig hanging out here, especially if there are PAW Patrol toys. And this room is sweet too. I think he’ll like it, once he gets a feel for the place.”

I didn’t mention I already had rails for the sides of the bed tucked in the closet. Wren knew I was slightly off-center, she just didn’t know how far off, and it’d stay like that if I could help it.

“I hope like hell he does. I need you to know, I’m so far in with you, I’m not gonna replace my way out.” I held her face in my hands, stroking a cheek slowly with my thumb. “I also need you to know in a couple months, I’m gonna be on the road touring, so this time we have is really fuckin’ precious.”

She swallowed. “I forgot about touring.”

“Yeah. It’s nothin’ like when we were writing to each other, but I will be gone for a couple weeks at a time, at minimum.”

Another thing I wouldn’t bring up was I intended for Wren and Ezra to join me on the road eventually. I knew myself well enough to realize I wasn’t gonna be sane if I had to be away from her that long. That topic would come up soon, but not today.

“I don’t even want to think about it.” Her fingers wrapped around my wrists. “We’ll have to start writing notes to each other again.”

I sucked in a breath through my nose. “You know, I never stopped. Each year on our anniversary, I wrote you an email. One on your birthday too. I didn’t send them, but I couldn’t let the date go by without marking it in a way.”

Her forehead hit my chest, her mouth following. “Callum,” she murmured. “Baby.”

Her arms were wrapped so tight around my middle, we were close to merging as one. I felt her tears on my skin and the tremble traveling through her body.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry, Little Bird.”

“I know.” Her fingertips dug into my back. “I’m sorry I’m being such a weirdo and crying all over you. It’s just…it kills me to know you were thinking about me, about us, and left wondering. I still hate myself for doing that to you.”

I dipped down to put my mouth beside her ear. “I can’t say I didn’t hate you for a while for doin’ it too. But now, we’re buildin’ what we’re buildin’, and I don’t feel bad about any of it anymore. I’ve let it go. In the back of my mind, I might wish I’d had you the last three years, but I’m sure as hell not pining over that lost time when I have you standin’ right in front of me now.”

“Okay,” she rasped. “You’re right.”

Her head tipped back, and a smile curved her lips, even as tears sparkled in her big, owlish eyes.

“Damn right I am.” I swiped a tear away. “If you ever want to read the emails I never sent, they’re on my laptop. Just turn it on. You’ll replace them in my Wren folder.”

“You have a Wren folder?” She was full-out beaming now.

“I do. I saved all our emails.”

Just like that, her head fell against my chest again and another sob broke through. “Oh my god, you’re killing me, baby. Just killing me.”

“Never knew you were a crier.”

“I’m a crier and a laugher, and when I get pissed, I’m a yeller.”

“When I make you come too.”

“Yeah,” she giggled. “You make me yell a lot.”

I only had her for a couple more hours before she had to return home. I hated letting her go after the sweet as hell morning we had…and the hot as hell night. The only reason I did was because I knew, without a doubt, I’d have her back. Soon, when the time was right, I wasn’t ever going to let her leave me again.

Adam kicked my chair. “What’s up, man? Haven’t seen you in ages.”

I kept my head still as a woman brushed my nose with powder. “Doin’ my thing. You?”

He rolled his eyes. “Doing your thing? Is that code for spending quality time with your girlfriend?”

It was. Like I had told Wren, this downtime was precious. I sucked up every single second of her time and attention I could get. I needed it. I liked her more than any other human on the planet, and when TSC went on the road, I was gonna need this time stored up so I didn’t give in to temptation and tuck my girl in my luggage.

It’d been almost a week since the night at my club. A couple days, it’d been too cold to sit outside on Wren’s shitty bench, so my driver circled the block while my girl and I sat in the back seat and she ate her lunch. Weather wasn’t gonna keep me from her. I parked my ass in the car for her morning and evening commute too and wound up spending most nights in her bed, sneaking out at sunrise. No more Ezra incidents since the first one, though Wren seemed less and less concerned about it. So much so, she’d brought Ez to my place for dinner twice this week. He hadn’t slept there yet, but that was coming soon.

Iris’s head jerked up from her phone. “Callie has a girlfriend?”

Rodrigo plopped down in her lap even though he had fifty pounds on her. “Keep up, bestie. Callum’s dating the cute little receptionist from Good Music.”

Iris’s eyes bugged out of her head. “No fucking way! That adorable, shy little thing who told me our chorus was a pile of shit and she was absolutely right? That one?”

“Wren,” I confirmed.

The makeup person studied my face for a second, nodded once, then moved on to Adam in the chair beside me. That kid was all kinds of shiny. She’d have to use gallons of powder to make him camera ready. And he needed to be camera ready, since we were about ten minutes away from recording an appearance on The Nighttime Show, debuting our first single from the album we’d recorded a few weeks ago.

Iris snapped her fingers. “Wait one second. The rumors have been swirling, but you know me, I ignore that shit. Were you, my Callie-Cal-Cal, in a bar fight? Because I heard that story and told Ronan it had to be patently false. My Callie doesn’t go to bars unless there are whips and chains on the walls, and he most certainly doesn’t make a spectacle.”

Rodrigo leaned his chin on his fist. “Who knew Ronan was a gossip?”

Iris grinned wide, showing the gap between her front teeth. “Ronan is all the things. He has his ear to the ground and always knows what’s going on with my people. He didn’t tell me Callum has a lady, though. Major oversight on his part.” Under her breath, but not too far under, she muttered something about Ronan being the one who’d end up tied to the bed tonight.

Roddy batted his lashes. “So, Callum, do tell. What made you come to blows in a place where your ass got recorded?”

I lifted a shoulder. “Didn’t think about cameras. Someone touched my girl, I took care of it.”

Iris fell back in her chair and fanned her face. “Wowza. I like that for Wren. Protective Callie, who knew?”

Adam raised his hand. “I did. The man nearly ripped my head off for looking at his girl.”

The glower I shot him said all I needed to say. He’d done a lot more than look at her, and he needed to forget that ever happened. The memory of his lips on hers needed to slide right out of his mind.

Iris crossed her leather-clad legs. “Where’s your head at with touring, now that you have a woman? You were my main man, Callie. Even when the other two fools—I love you guys, but you drive me bananas—can’t get their acts together, I can always count on you to be ready to perform. Are you still here with us? Are you going to be good going on the road?”

I shrugged. “Don’t know what I don’t know. I’m not gonna be happy bein’ away from her. But that’s somethin’ I’ll work on in my own time. I won’t bring that on stage.”

Her eyes narrowed. “You never bring personal stuff into the band. I’m just going to say this now and let it lie, because I know you hate being the center of everyone’s attention like you are right now. Ronan will be with me most of the time when we’re on the road. Hope will be with Roddy. If you want Wren with us, then she’s with us. If you need to fly home between shows, we’ll make it happen. I’d prefer to have adorable Wren with us since there aren’t enough girls around here, but I want you happy, Cal. I want our band to rock the shit out of our shows too. So—”

“She has a kid.”

Iris stopped speaking. Adam jerked away from the makeup artist to twist around in his seat and face me. Roddy straightened, his eyebrows up to his hairline.

“How old?” Iris asked.

“Three.”

“Cute?” Roddy asked.

“Fuckin’ adorable,” I confirmed.

Iris grinned. “Look at you, all paternal and proud.”

“She has a kid?” Adam seemed perplexed by this.

“Yep. Ezra.”

Iris crossed her arms over her chest and flicked her fingers. “I know tours aren’t exactly ideal places for small children, but we’re all settling down—”

Adam coughed. “Speak the fuck for yourself, madam.”

She rolled her eyes. “All of us are settling down except legendary groupie-magnet, Adam Wainwright.” She flicked her fingers again. “Anyway, the kid is welcome. Ezra is welcome. I’m just putting that out there. When the time comes, we will hammer out the details.”

I dipped my head. “Thank you.”

I didn’t say more, but that acceptance meant a lot. Because I did plan on bringing Wren and Ezra around my band. I did want them to attend shows and spend some nights on buses with me. If I had pushback from my bandmates…well, if it came down to a choice, I knew the one I’d make, and it wouldn’t make me happy.

But right now, I was happy.

A producer stuck their head in the room, inviting us to follow them to the stage. The audience was live, the broadcast wasn’t.

The appearances, interviews, autographs, paparazzi, the fame, it all got old. But this, heading to the stage to play with the three people I’d lived through some of the shittiest, happiest times in my life with, this never got old. The seasons were always changing, but the desire to blow down the house with our sounds never, ever went away.