My biggest flex in life is I already know my soulmate. All four of them, actually, and they’ve been my best friends for fifteen years. Ten out of ten, recommend.

—Kenzie’s Secret Thoughts

Nixon presses his lips to my forehead, and I open my eyes. “You leaving?” I ask, still half asleep.

“Yeah, baby. Go back to sleep. I’ll see you tonight.” He kisses me again, and I pull him down to me and think about holding him here so I can hide from the world a little bit longer.

“I’m going to talk to your sisters this morning, so I don’t blindside them tonight. Just letting you know.”

“Have fun with that.” He pulls back and pulls the blanket up to cover my naked chest. “You make it really hard to want to leave, Mac.”

“Then don’t,” I murmur, still not ready to burst our bubble.

“Don’t tempt me.” He shakes his head and walks away, and I feel the loss on a molecular level and wonder when exactly that happened. When did hesitation turn to want and want turn to need? Actual physical need?

I don’t have to be in the office until noon today, so I grab my phone from the nightstand and shoot off a text to the girls.

Kenzie

Anyone around for coffee this morning?

Brynlee

If you don’t mind Knight attached to my boob because that’s the only time he doesn’t cry, I’m in. But seriously . . . do I have to shower?

Gracie

Umm . . . That’s a no-go for me. The smell of coffee makes me want to vomit.

Everly

Everything makes you want to vomit.

Gracie

You’re not wrong.

Kenzie

Didn’t the medicine help?

Gracie

Well I’m not actually vomiting anymore, but feeling like I’m going to is almost as bad. I swear to God, you’re tying my tubes the second these babies are out of me. I’m not doing this again.

Lindy

You said that after the twins.

Gracie

Yeah well, I didn’t know the next time I’d be having triplets. Seriously, how the hell did this happen?

Everly

Maybe if you’d get off your husband’s dick every now and then, you wouldn’t always be knocked-up. Just saying.

Brynlee

Shots fired. Who pissed in your cheerios, Evie?

Lindy

She’s just pissed because Cross went and got snipped, and they can’t have sex for a week or two.

Everly

Listen, three kids are plenty. And unlike Gracie, I have no need to test my luck with twins or triplets. And holy shit, do those genes run strong in our family.

Lindy

We’ve got appointments booked all day today, Kenz. Rain check?

Kenzie

Okay – let me rephrase.

Anybody going to the Revolution game tonight?

Lindy

I am.

Everly

Me.

Brynlee

Not unless you want to see my jumbo boobs on the jumbotron.

Lindy

No. Just no. Put them away and get him a pacifier, Brynnie.

Gracie

Doubtful at this rate, but maybe. I want to see Hendrix.

Good grief, they don’t make it easy.

Kenzie

Well I’ll be there, and I’m probably going to be wearing Nixon’s jersey.

Everly

Still doing the fake-a-date thing?

Lindy

Report the motherfucker to HR and move on. No one should have this much power over you, Kenzie. Dr. Dick has got to go if this is legitimately the only way you can deal with him.

Kenzie

Not a fake-a-date.

Everly

I’m lost. Huh?

Brynlee

OMG. Follow the breadcrumbs people. She’s been boinking your brother’s brains out for weeks, guys. How has nobody noticed? I have a newborn and I knew.

Gracie

I’m sorry. What!?

Everly

Brynnie knew!

Lindy

Your brother is going to shit.

Kenzie

You are not going to tell my brother today. Do not fuck this game up for them, Lindy, or I will . . . Fuck. I don’t know what I’ll do. But don’t say anything. I’ll talk to Easton tomorrow.

Lindy

The hell you will. If you want Nixon to live long enough to one day give you multiple orgasms, that man is going to have to talk to your extremely overprotective brother himself.

Kenzie

 . . .

Gracie

Kenzie???

Kenzie

Well . . . umm, technically, he’s already lived through the multiple orgasms many, many, MANY times. What can I say? He’s an overachiever. Ohh, and he’s really bossy too.

Everly

You dirty dog. You really have been boinking his brains out.

Gracie

I might throw up.

Everly

Everything makes you throw up.

Gracie

Not like this. You’re really boinking Nixon?

Kenzie

We’re grown women. Can we please stop saying boinking?

Brynlee

Is the sex good?

Lindy

Multiple orgasms, Brynnie. Did you miss that???

Kenzie

So fucking good. I never knew it could be like this. Like seriously, I had no clue I’d love sucking dick as much as I do. I mean . . . you guys always said it was fun, but I didn’t believe you. Now I get it.

Everly

Eww. That’s my brother.

Lindy

Yup. And your brother likes pussy, sweetie. Time to build a bridge and get over it.

Gracie

Ohh, you’re a mean little twat waffle, aren’t you?

Lindy

Twat waffle?

Gracie

Leave me alone. It’s the best I could come up with. Seriously . . . You’re sleeping with Nixon?

Kenzie

It’s more than that, guys. He’s not just a giant sex toy to play with.

Lindy

But he is a giant, isn’t he? You waited forever for good dick. I really hope it’s big and curves just enough.

Gracie

Yup. I just threw up. Thanks for that.

Kenzie

I mean, clinically speaking . . . yeah. Fuck it. Even by textbook examples, he’s pretty fucking big.

Gracie

Please stop. I’m begging. I haven’t eaten enough to puke any more than I already have.

Brynlee

Guys. The way he was looking at her when she was holding Knight. Our boy is gone for our girl.

Lindy

Could you make us sound any more incestuous!

Gracie

Wait. Is it really more than sex?

Everly

Okay. Serious talk for a minute here. I can’t believe you even have to ask that. I didn’t see him watching her holding Knight, but I know the look. It’s the one Nixon’s had on his face since the first time you slept over and wore a bikini. Pretty sure he jerked off to that image all through high school.

Brynlee

Umm, eww. Leave it to you to ruin what started as such a promising statement.

Lindy

It’s a compliment.

Gracie

Umm . . .

Kenzie

He did not.

Gracie

Shut up. Even you couldn’t have been that oblivious, Kenzie.

Kenzie

Even me? What does that mean?

Lindy

It means you never realized the way everyone looked at you because you didn’t care. You had us, and you had sports and books, and you never really cared about boys. Not back then. And those high school boys were looking. You were, and still are, hot as hell. And what’s hotter is that you don’t even know it. You really were oblivious.

Brynlee

Gonna go out on a limb here and say you had her until you said oblivious again.

Kenzie

Yeah, not loving that word.

Everly

You’re smart. And hot. And a goddamned doctor. You need a flaw, Kenz. Be grateful oblivious is the worst of it and you don’t have ugly feet or something.

Brynlee

Ugly feet?

Everly

It was the best I could come up with. I can’t tease her about the sex. It’s Nixon, and even I have lines I can’t cross. At least not yet. Give me time to work on it, and I’m sure I’ll get past that little hang-up.

Gracie

Not me. I don’t want to hear about my brother’s junk.

Kenzie

Better get used to it. You’ve all tortured me about Easton and Lindy for years. Payback’s a bitch.

Lindy

Let’s see. Do you prefer to suck his dick on your knees or on the bed because Easton likes it when I’m on my knees and he can tug my hair.

Kenzie

What the fuck!

Lindy

Just saying. There are ways I can control three out of four of you now. This is going to be fun.

Brynlee

You know you’re a little scary, right?

Lindy

Yup. See you all tonight.

Gracie

I didn’t say I was going.

Lindy

Oh sweeties. You’re not going to want to miss these fireworks.

Kenzie

Do. Not. Tell. My. Brother.

Lindy

One hundred bucks and the right to talk about your brother’s cock whenever I want says I won’t have to tell him.

Kenzie

Just had to bring the cock up one more time, didn’t you?

Lindy

Yup. Game on.

Hello, all you beautiful people.

An apology is in order. It’s official. I was outscooped. And we all know how much I hate to be outscooped. According to footage just shared to this reporter’s tipline, it looks like one of our favorite Kroydon Hills socialites was just spotted walking into the Revolution Arena with a certain name and number on her back that doesn’t belong to her big brother. Is one of our favorite puck packers dating his team captain’s little sister?

Looks like I have a new mission to fulfill, and I won’t rest until it’s been completed and I can confirm or deny. Check back soon for all the dirty deets.

#KroydonKronicles #ScoopOfTheCentury #PuckPackPlusOne

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