Brothers

Moon makes it back to the packhouse before the surge of anger that fuels her passes. She saw Jess following behind her but notices Chris and Colin were still missing. She makes it as far as the packhouse steps before collapsing completely.

Jess is there helping Moon up and wrapping Moon’s arm around her neck while she wraps her arm around Moon’s waist.

“Thank you.” Moon quietly utters as Jess helps her to her feet, opening the door to the packhouse. Ben and Emily are sitting on the sofa, talking with several warriors. Ben quickly gets to his feet and helps Moon.

“What happened,” Ben demands, looking at Jess.

“She shifted, well, half shifted anyway.” Jess shrugs. She doesn’t even completely know what happened because she only heard about most of it, not really witnessing it.

“She what?” Ben gasps looking at Moon.

“Please, I just want to go lay down. I’m tired, and everything hurts. I don’t really want to talk about it now.” Moon begs, sounding as tired as she feels.

“Yeah, but where is Alpha Colin and Chris?” Ben presses, unwilling to relent the interrogation.

“That counts as talking about it, Benny,” Moon says, yawning. “Jess, can you help me get to my room?”

“I will,” Emily says, coming over to Moon’s other side, and Moon leans on her.

Once they are out of earshot of everyone, Emily leans in. “I heard some of the people that attacked us. They said Colin’s name. It’s pretty clear that whoever attacked us did it just to get to him. Not to mention that wolf. It looked just like him, Moon. Did he say anything to you?”

“No, he didn’t want to talk to me,” Moon remarks sadly as Emily helps her into her room, and they sit on the bed.

“Moon, you shifted?” Emily is still pressing Moon to talk, and Moon flops back on the bed.

“No, I half shifted, and apparently, that can kill you if you stay like that too long. I couldn’t shift completely, and my wolf seems to think I am doing it on purpose. I also think my wolf might hate me for it. I don’t know, Em, leave it to me to be defective, I guess.”

“Moon, you have never been defective.” Emily soothes, but Moon just huffs. “We’ll, talk more later, okay?”

“Yeah, sure,” Moon says, and when Emily leaves and closes the door, Moon lets herself cry. She has never been the crying type. She cried when her gramps died, but that was the last time she truly sobbed her heart out.

Moon curls up on the bed, crying until she falls asleep feeling completely drained. She has a wolf that doesn’t seem to like her much, and Colin seems to feel the same way about her as her wolf. For the first time in a long time, Moon wishes to be someone else. She had grown to accept herself, or at least she thought she did, but now she wasn’t so sure. While Moon slept, she didn’t even dream. She didn’t see the white wolf with blue eyes. She didn’t even see Colin in her dreams she would never admit how often she had seen him lately. All there is is the black emptiness that she feels.

***

Colin shifted and prowls the woods, angry at himself and everything. He is out of control of what is happening around him and hates it. He needs control just to make himself feel safe. He was thrown from his pack and forced to start over. If it hadn’t been for his mother’s uncle taking pity on him and taking him in, Colin would have been a rogue. Unwanted by his own pack and family. Colin is the great family secret no one discussed. His father has hated him from the day he was born.

His mother was already pregnant with Colin when she turned out to be Alpha Maddox’s mate. Maddox told her to tell everyone that Colin was his. Still, Alpha Maddox never treated him like he was, and when Caleb was born, Maddox only grew colder to Colin. The tipping stone was Colin’s little sister Callie. Colin didn’t like to think about Callie. It was his fault what happened, and he knows it even if it was a lie; he should have protected her.

Colin howls loud and clear into the air, everything is spinning out of his control. He knows he will have to face Moon, but how does he tell her what a monster he is?

You are not a monster; what happened was not your fault. Farrell tries again, but Colin isn’t listening. You have to stop blaming yourself. Moon needs us, and I think she is more than any ordinary wolf. I felt her wolf for a moment, but it was enough. She is not a normal wolf, Colin, and she needs us.

Colin hangs his head he knows he can’t avoid her forever, and there is the problem of the Big Springs pack. Colin isn’t sure what Caleb hoped to gain in destroying the little pack, but if Colin knows his brother, he has nothing good in mind. Colin never thought he would see his little brother, let alone have to fight him. Colin didn’t want anything to do with fighting Caleb. He just wanted to talk to Caleb, but Caleb had no intention of that and managed to hit Colin with some wolfbane laced in his claws while they struggled. Luckily for colin, it was a small dose, and the scratch wasn’t too deep. Caleb always resorted to any means necessary to win; he never cared what it cost so long as he came out on top.

Colin had tried to be close to his brother growing up, but Caleb was always Maddox’s favorite. Colin never had a chance to just be his older brother. Colin tried, but it was always in vain Maddox made sure of that. Caleb got everything while Colin was forgotten or sent away to military training schools. Colin excelled in every subject, trying to win some favor with Maddox, but there was no pleasing him. Colin grew to hate Maddox, but he hoped his brother might come around.

When Colin’s mother died suddenly, Colin had been away at school. He didn’t even know she was sick. Then the night after the funeral, Colin thought, he and Caleb found some common ground. They got into Maddox’s best whisky and took off into the woods to kill the pain of losing their mother.

They had taken about a case of whisky, and Colin drank most of it he doesn’t clearly remember what happened that night, only what he was told and a few fragments of memories. He woke up covered in blood, and his sister was missing. They never could replace her. Colin was blamed, and the main accuser was his brother, claiming he saw Colin take off in an out-of-control rage. Colin has no real memory, but he remembers Callie screaming and her terrified face as she tried to run. He remembers going after her but nothing after that. Everything was a blur to him. He just assumed that he had done the unthinkable. It was easy to blame himself. He was so angry that night he hadn’t even been told his mother was sick. An instructor at the academy told him his mother had died. Maddox didn’t even tell Colin himself or speak to him at the funeral. The hurt and anger Colin felt were fueled by whisky and side remarks from Caleb until Colin lost his temper. Callie was suddenly there, she got scared of him when he shifted and was about to attack Caleb for a comment he made about their mother when she screamed and took off. That is the last thing he remembers seeing his little sister so afraid of him.

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