The Dragon King’s Substitute Bride
Chapter 75

HERA

One long heartbeat passes before Leo finally lets go, lowering his hand back to his side.

"You do you know your grace that he is going to be beyond angry that you deliberately put yourself in danger"

"I do."

But I also do not care. I did what I had to and as long as he comes back unharmed, he can be as angry as he damn well pleased.

The chief Ryder slowly raises his right brow. "You do not seem particularly frightened."

I simply shrug in response, once again amazed at how easy it is for Leo to read me.

No...the dragon king does not scare me anymore. Not when I have all these other feelings rushing through my mind every time I look at him.

I watch Leo rise from the bed, suddenly not really in the mood to be left by myself with all this thoughts of worry in my head.

"Where are you going?"

"To have the maids bring up something for you to eat."

"I never said I was hungry."

He smirks. "You did not have to. The noises your belly is making are about to deafen me."

I replace myself blushing, embarrassed that he had heard and quickly cover it up by glaring at him.

"One of these days Leo, I am going to ask for your head."

The chief Ryder merely grins. "Ask your husband, he has been trying to do the same thing for decades now."

My husband...

Well now I am blushing again for a completely different reason.

"You... are not going to lock me in are you?"

Leo stops, turning back to look at me, one hand on the door knob.

"No your highness. Besides, what good would it do? We all know how 'excellent' of a lock pick you are."

The pillow sails across the room but he slides effortlessly out of the way, laughing at me.

"Throwing things is not very queen-like your grace..."

"Oh go fudge yourself Leo."

I can still hear him laughing even after the door swings shut behind him.

The very moment I am alone again, my mind immediately wanders, once more replaceing its way back to him.

This entire scenario; on the verge of tears and nearly blind with worry, twisting my fingers, and chewing on my lip until I taste blood, it is all very familiar to me. Because I have lived it once before.

The day my father died.

It is the waiting that gets to you the most, existing in a limbo of uncertainty, afraid to replace out the truth because it might be your worst nightmare, yet unable to bear the thought of not knowing. It had happened barely three days to my sixteenth moon harvest.

The man I called my father is and was a good man... or at least he tried to be.

And he may not have been perfect but in his own way he had loved us, so very much.

He just loved gambling more.

Said it gave him a thrill nothing else could provide.

He believed himself to be a lucky man and sometimes he would indeed bring home a pouch stuffed full with coins or a fat goose he had won from this person or that person.

But the truth everyone else but my father could see was that he lost so much more than he won.

It was not something we spoke about in the open but it was also not a secret.

Especially not when he began to gamble away things that mattered to our family.

As a family we were all used to my father's excesses; the late nights, the missing heirlooms, the almost manic highs after one of his rare wins.

And by the gods we loved him. As crazy as he was, we loved him.

Because no matter what happened he was always there and he always came back home.

Until the night he didn't.

None of us got any sleep that night.

Somehow we all knew that something terrible had happened to him.

My mother, unable to sit still and too stubborn to listen to reason, had wrapped her shawl around her neck and went out into the dangerous, dark night looking for him. Leaving me in charge to whispers promises to my worried siblings that I knew, deep inside of me, were nothing but lies.

She did replace him but she was too late.

I can still remember hearing the words as if from far away.

My father had bet on our house and lost and then, right there in the tavern, like taking away the roof over our heads was not enough, he had slumped and died of heart attack.

So this feeling of deep seated worry and panic is not in any way new to me.

I hated it then and I hate it even more now.

I am not sure what it means, that I am this concerned about the dragon king but I replace myself praying to all the gods that he is okay.

Because I do not know what I would do if he is not.

Henette brings my meal and I eat quickly, barely tasting the food in my mouth, my eyes fixed outside my window; willingly him to come back home.

To come back to me.

Yet the sun goes down, bell after bell ringing out and yet, the king does not return.

I am starting to feel faint with worry and I keep pacing around my room.

It does not matter that it is getting cold, I leave the drapes open so I can know the very moment he returns.

Henette, worried about me, somehow manages to force me into bed but how can I possibly fall asleep when worry for him is all that fills my mind.

But I must have been more tired than I realized because the next thing I know, I am opening my eyes in bed and the sky outside of my open window is a dark velvet almost completely devoid of stars. From the silence that surrounds me I can tell that it must be the middle of the night already.

My heart is pounding and I am wide awake now, much too nervous to sit still.

Has he still not returned... what if something has indeed happened to him?

"That is it."

I throw my covers aside and swing my legs off the bed.

I am going to replace someone. Leo...some random guard...I do not bloody care.

Someone has to know something and I demand to know what exactly is going on.

I tie a cloak around my neck to ward off the cold and step outside my room, surprised to see that Garwith is not standing outside, guarding my door as usual.

I should be glad that they are no longer worried I might try to escape but I am too confused to take too much notice of it.

I descend barefoot down the curved stone steps and towards the passage that connects my tower with the rest of the castle.

On a whim and for some reason I cannot explain, I replace myself heading not into the castle itself but towards the west tower, the room Henette told me Midas has now chosen to stay.

I knock on the door before I can lose my nerve, feeling slightly foolish and not really expecting any reply.

I get none.

And then in a moment of pure madness...

What if he has indeed returned and is with Minth instead?

I shake my head furiously.

No come on Hera that is....absurd?

I try to tell myself that I am being ridiculous but my hands start to shake and hurt blossoms somewhere in my chest.

"Oh come Hera, You are being silly and why do you even care if he is with her and not you?"

I press my fingers into my eyes suddenly afraid.

Afraid to open the door and replace out that I am not being silly at all, afraid to replace out that I do care, that I care a great deal.

But I cannot stand not knowing so I push the door open, its hinges creaking loudly in the silence of the night and step into the semi-darkened space.

It smells like him.

It is also quite average at first glance.

Not even as big as the one that is supposed to be ours.

So it is not the room itself that causes me to freeze after taking just one step.

He gets up from where he had been sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.

"Hera..."

I stand there unable to move, nearly dizzy with relief.

The breath I did not even realize I had been holding leaves my mouth as a startled gasp, and I feel my eyes start to sting.

I press the heel of my hands into my eyes to stop the tears.

But it is not just relief that causes my body to quiver and shake. It is something else...something just as strong.

Anger

"You came back."

He does not look away but he also makes no move to come towards me. "I did."

"And you did not think I deserved to know?"

"You were asleep."

"Skies above I could have been awakened, I was asleep not bloody unconscious."

"I did not see the point..."

I scoff loudly, my ears refusing to believe what they are hearing.

"I was unable to sit still, I kept looking outside my window, barely able to even eat, worrying about you and you did not see the point..."

He groans, running his hands through his hair.

"Goddamit Hera."

This is the first time I have ever seen him look like this; ruffled, worried and not in control of his emotions.

And while one part of me wants to go to him, to hold him until he calms down and the lines between his brows disappear, the other part of me is still completely livid.

"Don't you dare swear at me Midas. What right do you think you have to make me worry like that and not come to see me the moment you got back?"

"I did come, but I did not want to wake you. Leo said..."

"Poppycock...you were avoiding speaking to me...why?"

"It is...complicated."

"...uncomplicate it."

Even from this distance, I can the internal battle going on behind his eyes, can see him struggle to replace the words.

"Is it because you are angry at me?"

His lips are pressed so hard together it is almost a thin line.

"You think you were the only one worried? Hera my kingdom was on the verge of a war! Some goddamn dark elf is running loose around my realm casting dark magic spells, stirring up trouble, killing my people and yet half time all I could think about was if you were ever going to wake up again."

"I did not ask you to worry about me. And why in all the realms are you angry anyway, I saved your life and your precious realm!"

"Because you put yourself in danger!"

"It was my choice goddamit!"

"Exactly!"

"You know what dragon king, never mind. Forget I even came."

I turn around and reach for the door.

But I barely manage to pull it open before he covers the distance between us and pushes it shut with the flat of his hand.

I glare up at him, my back pined against the door but he does not move away, caging me in with the largeness of his body.

He stares down at me, his chest heaving.

"I almost lost you today Hera, not once but twice. I have lived a hundred and fifty years and never..."

He pauses, exhales, struggling to hide the emotion that roughens the edges of his voice. "...not once have I ever been as afraid as I was today."

I stare at a point on his chest, trying hard to ignoring the rapid pitter patter of my racing heart.

"You once told me nothing else mattered to you..."

Midas swallows. "I did."

I look up at him, my breath hitching when I meet his eyes again. "And now...?"

Many heartbeats pass and he says nothing.

He simply stares at me...the both of us breathing heavily.

And then, just when I am about to give up, thinking he does not intend to answer...

He drags my body against his, buries his hand in my hair and slams his lips against mine.