Time is my biggest fear. What if I do get better,

but become everything I hated?

What if I change myself,

but forget everything I went through?

I’ve done it before, who’s to say I can’t again?

True, I hate myself.

Yet in this moment, I like the aura I have and give. I don’t want it to change.

Maybe that’s why I’m not healing?

I don’t want to let go of the dark me. She has fun, but does she?

There’s only so much time in a lifetime. And hopefully less in mine.

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