Way of the Wolf: Redemption
Chapter 36: Deserving

I couldn't stop shaking no matter how many times I was assured I was safe. Katrin gently uncurled my fingers from Basjan's furs so she could take him again but I only held him tighter. Nobody was taking my son from my arms, but I didn't have the energy to growl that warning.

There was only one wolf that could calm me down and he was still nowhere to be seen. The only thing that kept me from losing my grip on reality completely was the matebond. It continued to flicker in my chest, letting me know my mate was alive and while I could feel he was in pain, he was alright. Calm even. With an underlying current of determination.

I grasped onto that.

"Let me take him so we can take care of you. Please," Katrin pleaded, crouching in front of the table I was sat on.

Other injured wolves filled the hall too, being tended to as Madden rushed around to heal the worst. I'd gotten off lightly. Some might have called me lucky. But my pup was completely unharmed and that was all that mattered to me. My gaze flicked to Katrin's face and then to my mother who was stood beside me with rough cloths to clean my wounds. It wasn't them that made me relinquish my grip on my male however. It wasn't even the thumping pain in my head that felt as if it would implode at any second, or any of the other many aches and bruises I'd sustained. It was the blood that smeared Basjan's cheek. My blood.

"I'll clean him up and keep him close. He won't leave your sight," Katrin promised, scooping Basjan into her arms. She gave me a smile that I couldn't will myself to return.

I watched her carry him across the room until my mother stepped into my line of sight. There was a deep crease between her brows as she looked me over and I cringed at what she must have seen. Blood was still dripping from the wound on my head, slowly trailing down to drop from my chin. My hands were crusted in red, it was under my fingernails and stained the rest of my body too.

"You don't have to be brave anymore, Freydis, you can relax. We have Valdis and the others that survived the fight locked tightly away for now. They will all pay for their crimes," she vowed as she began slowly cleaning the blood from me.

My lip trembled and my hands fisted together. "He's. . .he's not dead?"

She paused, sharp green eyes scanning my face. "Not yet."

I wanted to demand why as panic once more flared. He wasn't dead? Why wasn't he dead? Why were they allowing him to live? He was strong, dangerous, they were running the risk of him escaping.

"He won't be going anywhere. He will meet his end," she said fiercely.

Nodding, I remained quiet as she washed the rest of me. I barely noticed when Madden came to check my head. All I could think about were the wolves who were now prisoners of the pack. What would happen to the rest of them once their leader was dead? Would they be killed too?

I frowned as I thought about the teenage twins that had joined Valdis' group only a year or so ago. They'd left me to die too, but they were young, and they too feared our leader. No blame could be placed on them, not really, and suddenly I felt the need to protect them. Perhaps I did have the instincts of a mother-wolf after all.

Pushing myself from the table, Signy gripped me in alarm and tried to ease me back down. I waved her hands away until I was standing, if a little unsteadily, on my feet.

"There were two younger wolves running with Valdis, twins, I need to know they're okay," I rushed. My voice sounded off, there was shaky, unhinged edge to it.

Signy kept a hand on my arm, the other lifting to cup my cheek and tilt my face towards her. "You don't owe any of them anything."

I shook my head, tearing myself from her arms, uncaring that I was drawing attention again.

"They're practically pups, móðir. They followed Valdis just as I did, why do I deserve a chance and they don't?" I demanded, turning back to face my Alpha Female with my shoulders pushed back and chin jutting out.

She smirked, which hadn't been the reaction I'd expected. Something shimmered in her eyes as she took note of my posturing. Respect?

"Very well, my female. Later, we will discuss the fate of these twins. But first you must let Madden finish," she bargained.

I sat back on the table to show my agreement and my mother didn't stop smiling the whole time Madden tended to my wounds. He chuckled as my nose scrunched as a foul smelling paste was smeared over the open cut on my head. It burned a little before numbing, taking the pain away with it.

"You and I need to make a deal. I don't want to have to tend to you again for the rest of the year," he teased.

My lips twitched. "That's something I'll agree to."

He grinned before someone called his name and he scampered off. I slid off the table, taking my mother's offered hand to keep me steady.

"I really think you should stay here and rest," she urged.

I shook my head. "I need to see with my own eyes that you have him. And I need to make sure the twins are alright. I suppose I'll have to fight with father to have him release them?"

My mother pursed her lips at the cheekiness in my tone but she looked relieved. I was well enough to joke, that must have been a good sign. Either way, her silence confirmed my suspicions. The Alpha didn't plan on letting anyone go. But perhaps I could persuade him to take pity on the young wolves.

"You have a lot of heart, dóttir."

I wasn't sure if that was a compliment or said in exasperation. Making sure Katrin was still happy with Basjan, I forced myself to leave him there. With the pack in and around the hall, he would be protected by a wall of teeth if anything went wrong.

Still unsteady on my feet, my progress out of the hall was slow. Heads bowed as I made my way past injured wolves and I made sure to thank each one for coming to my aid. They protested of course, it was their duty to defend the pack. But if it weren't for me, they wouldn't have needed to. I felt a heavy weight of responsibility for each and every injury.

Clattering my way down the wooden steps drew attention from the wolves outside. Mostly unharmed, a few even sported grins and patted each other on the back for a fight well done. They thrived on their ability to protect. My gaze scanned over them all, searching for my mate or father but my eyes found Valdis first.

He was tied to the wooden post used to teach mostly younger wolves lessons if they stepped too far out of line. I shuddered at the sight of his blood covered fur, manic eyes focussed solely on me with his lips peeled back to reveal missing sharp teeth. My stomach rolled at the red that dripped from his mouth. They'd taken his fangs?

The sensation of someone standing behind me had my back straightening. My brother said nothing as his hand came down on my shoulder, squeezing gently. I turned and he tugged me into his arms, holding me tight as my walls broke down.

I cried with relief at finally being safe, and grief at losing Sol, lingering fear at being so close to a male who'd intended to kill just to take my son. All the while Orin held me as he'd done when I was upset as a pup, tighter when it felt as though my legs would give out beneath me.

"Sol," I choked, unable to get the rest of my words out. It didn't matter that our mother had said it was how he'd want to go; he'd been my mentor and he'd given his life for mine.

"His body has been brought back. We will all have our chance to say goodbye." His voice was strained with emotion but he held himself together far better than I ever could.

A sudden bout of snarling and rattling and my gaze flew back to Valdis. He was fighting desperately to get free but it was useless and he tired himself out quickly. Still, a shiver of unease went up my spine as his eyes held mine.

Fresh blood flowed from his wounds and he slumped into the snow that was a gruesome red and pink around him. It was too hard to stomach and I pressed my face back against my brother's chest. "Why didn't you kill him?"

"We're going to do a ritual that will make sure that when we do kill him, his soul will replace no peace," he replied, puffing himself up. "He doesn't deserve that honour, so for you I will make sure it is kept from him."

It seemed cruel. Too cruel perhaps. I didn't like the idea of condemning anyone to a fate of torture for eternity. But a darker part of me licked her lips and savoured the taste of revenge. So I nodded, accepting my brother's wishes.

He stopped posturing, mismatched eyes darkening with a frown as his fingers followed where he looked. I cringed away when he brushed over the healing wound at my hairline. A growl from a quick moving shadow behind him had him dropping his hand and I was tugged into strong arms before I could focus on who it was. The mountain scent of my mate enveloped me and soon I was clinging to him just as tight.

My Beta, my bear of a wolf, almost crushed me. He growled possessively by my throat, sending a shiver of delight through me. I drunk in the feel of him, a growl of my own slipping out at the copper that tainted his scent.

"You're bleeding," I accused, wriggling my way out of his vice like grip.

"As are you." He grumbled, tipping my head up. "You should be inside with Madden. Where is Basjan, is he okay?"

I nodded, cupping the back of his hand. "Madden already saw to me, and Basjan is completely unharmed. You should give your thanks to Wulf, he ran with him to safety. It would been a lot to him if you did, he looks up to you."

"I'll sing his praises to the moon," he replied, only a little teasingly.

I smirked. I'd hold him to that promise. As I went back to searching the pack, I realised Valdis was the only one out here. Glancing over at my brother again, I asked, "What about the rest of them? Are they dead already?"

Gods I hoped not. At least not the twins.

Orin shook his head and motioned towards a hut at the edge of the river. "Their fates will be discussed. The ones that fought are dead, these are the wolves that ran or simply watched. There's three of them locked inside. Aljana, Jakkon and Fenna are with another two in Madden's hut waiting for him."

"Then they're cowards and we should do away with them too," Bjarke muttered, tugging me into his side. I had to brace my hand on his chest to stop from collapsing against him as I stared at him with wide eyes. Such harsh words didn't sit right with me. Not all of Valdis' wolves were monsters. Perhaps some could be saved as I had been.

"I'm looking for two wolves, pups really," I said, tugging at Bjarke's tunic and giving my brother a look I hoped would make him listen. "Twins. They never hurt me, or any other for that matter. They were terrified of Valdis and his stories so followed him, just like I did. They don't deserve a death, they deserve a chance."

Orin look sceptical but at least my Beta seemed to be considering my words. My brother and mate shared a look, a silent conversation that had me curious. They knew who I was talking about, I saw the recognition in their eyes.

"The male and his sister. . . I'm not so sure, Freydis. They're even more feral than you were. It's taking three wolves to keep them down-"

"Just a chance," I pleaded, interrupting Orin. "They know my face. Take me to them, I can keep them calm."

Another shared look and Bjarke began to nod. "I'll take her and relieve Fenna. She could use a rest."

Orin seemed relieved at that and bowed his head in approval. Instead of heading towards the river though, we headed to Madden's hut. I frowned. Did that mean one or both of them were badly injured? No wonder they were reacting badly. From the little I knew about them both, I knew one thing; they were fiercely protective of eachother, especially the male over his sister.

The sounds of snarling got louder the closer we got and my heart began to hammer. I wasn't sure what to expect when Orin opened the door for me but the chaos inside shocked me. Aljana and Fenna were struggling to keep a heavily bleeding female on the bed while my father kept a young male pinned to the floor, avoiding snapping fangs.

Bjarke began to tug me back but I snatched myself from his grip and threw myself forward. "Enough!"

The power that reverberated out rattled through the wolves, enough that they stilled to take stock of me. The poor female looked distraught with her cheeks bright red and wet with tears that had hair sticking to her skin. The male just looked furious, wild eyes locked onto the hands that held his twin.

The change of language came so easily to me, switching to the one Valdis had used and I knew the pair of twins understood at least a little.

"You remember me don't you?" I asked them both, softening my voice for them. They were pups, I reminded myself. Frightened young wolves who'd only ever known fear and violence.

The male jerked his head as best he could with my father's teeth inches from his throat.

"You used to trust me. Do you still?"

With eerie synchronisation, the twins looked at eachother before they both nodded this time.

I stepped properly into the hut, keeping a smile on my face despite the want to throw up. It stank of something awful in here and it took me a moment to place the scent. The poor she-wolf had been so frightened of Aljana, Fenna and the huge Alpha that she'd wet herself.

Crouching by the male, I finally understood the pack's frustration with me having no name. There was nothing to call either of them that would establish some sort of relationship, or trust. Nothing to make them seem less feral and more tame.

"Your sister is wounded. If it's not seen to, she could die. Do you understand? She needs to be in here and you need to let the healer look at her. I swear to you, nobody here will hurt her. You're not in any trouble for what happened. I'll make sure of that," I vowed.

My father's jaw clenched a little but he said nothing of me taking control and making promises that were actually his to give. Instead, he leaned down to whisper something by the young male's ears that made blue eyes widen and dart to me again. I could guess what he'd said, that I was his daughter and if he made a move to hurt me, he'd regret it.

Aljana and Fenna released his sister who flopped onto the bed, all fight drained from her. She was panting hard, sharp little breaths that moved her whole body. Had one of our wolves injured her? It didn't hold right, and the more I breathed in, the more I could tell that the wound wasn't new. No. It stunk of rot, decay.

My anger grew. I should have thought about them both from the beginning. Perhaps I could have persuaded the pack to go look for and take them in months ago. But would they have even come? After all, it had taken me weeks to stop trying to run every second.

Fenna slipped by me with a touch to my hand but she couldn't stand to be in the room anymore. I pretended not to hear her being sick outside as she leaned against Orin. It was hard to stomach in here. What the fuck had Valdis and his wolves done to get these two into such a state?

With my father back on his feet, Aljana still by the bed, my mate at the door and the male twin still lying stuff on the floor, it was clear there were far too many of us in here. And I knew there would be another struggle as soon as Madden arrived.

"You've got a few scratches yourself, why don't you let Alpha Jakkon and my mate take you to get cleaned up and fed?" I suggested.

He looked suspicious, eyeing the two males still keeping him trapped between them. "Fed?"

"Meat, bread, broth, whatever you'd like. Save some for your sister too."

Another wary look, blue eyes flicked to the female that was no longer conscious and I could see the struggle in his eyes. His body began to tremble but I could tell he was exhausted he, and that he wanted to believe what I offered could possibly be true.

"If you hurt her. . ." He left the threat hanging and I lifted a hand to cut off Bjarke's growl.

Another smile I hoped was sweet and I bowed my head. ""If anyone hurts her, my life is yours."

My father tensed immediately but we had nothing to worry about. I knew they'd both be safe. Only a small part of me felt I was stepping over the line and onto the authority of the Alpha but I took his silence as permission. The male allowed Bjarke to guide him outside and my father stared at me with dark blue eyes.

"You're too much like your mother," he muttered, running a hand through his hair. "I'll see the pup is fed but if he causes any trouble he'll be put away with the others. Tonight you and I will discuss what's to be done but I'm certain you already know what you want eh?"

I couldn't help but laugh and shrug, glancing over my shoulder at the female on the bed. She wasn't so different from me. Younger yes, but just as deserving of a home. If her brother couldn't keep his temper, I wasn't sure she'd stay here without him. They were glued to the hip, almost as if they were two halves of the same wolf sometimes.

Sighing before looking back at my father, I did my best to stand tall under his gaze. I was Beta Female. I had a right to have a say didn't I? But nothing more needed said. My father pressed his cheek against mine and squeezed my arm. "I'm glad you're okay. You had us worried again. Only peace now, yes?"

"Only peace," I agreed.

As soon as Valdis was dead.