Chasing My Rejected Luna
Chapter 81

TEGAN'S P.O.V

I wasn't exactly sure what it was that I wanted to talk to her about, but I knew that I had a lot of big emotions I needed off my chest. My mind was constantly going at a rapid speed so someone's insight that I trusted was exactly what I needed.

As I approached her wing I thought about the first time I had come to her. I was a broken mess. I wasn't sure I would ever be able to let go of what happened to me. I'm not over all that has happened, I still have a long way to go. But I don't sit in my room terrified of interactions with others. I also don't cry myself to sleep at night anymore. The nightmares are still present but at least when I wake up, I know inside that it was only a dream. I climbed the stairs of the wing, stopping in my tracks immediately when I heard a voice I never expected to hear in this wing.

"Thanks Doc."

I dared not to turn the corner yet. I didn't want him to know I was here.

"I will see you again tomorrow at the same time, right?" Kennedy asked.

"Yes, just like the old times." He replied.

"Good, I'm glad to hear it. Get some rest, Ezra."

I could hear the footsteps as they descended in the opposite direction from where I was. I waited a moment before turning the corner and knocking on Doctor Kennedy's door. She opened it within moments. "Ahh, Tegan, welcome home." She said, happily.

I tried everything to hold in my next question but somehow the urge of the question overpowered my will to hold it back.

"Was that the King I just heard leaving?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I cannot discuss anybody else, you know that. Would you like to come in?" She asked, moving from blocking the door.

I entered her office, taking a seat on the familiar couch that was already prewarmed.

"Is he a patient of yours?" I asked. Praying to the Goddess that there wasn't more going on to them than that. Not that I had a right to hope that, I was the one refusing to take him back.

Kennedy was far from ugly. She had beautiful natural tanned skin with caramel eyes and long wavy light brown hair. She had a slim body with curves in the right places, which the clothing she wore accented her figure perfectly. She was smart and very comforting. All a wonderful Luna would provide.

'Not a Queen though! Gemma piped in with a smart remark.

"What brought you in today, Tegan?" Kennedy asked, ignoring my question once again.

"Right. Patient confidentiality. I just don't understand what he would have issues with. He was the one that rejected me and here he is trying to spy on me and then seeking out therapy, like he is hurting as if this was all my fault." I said defeated. "So what I hear is, you're having issues with him hurting like you because he rejected you."

"Is he hurting?" I asked.

"I am only repeating what you're saying to get a better understanding of how you feel. Do you want him to feel the same pain you do?"

"Is that wrong?" I asked.

'He has a right to hurt, he lost his mate too! Gemma said in my head.

'But he chose to lose his mate.' I replied, not knowing how to let go of that pain.

"I think everyone has a right to have feelings. Some have big feelings whereas some have small feelings. No matter which, we all need to express them in some way or another."

Her words echoed in my mind. She was right, he may be a King but he has a right to hurt just like anyone else. I just never expected such a big bad Alpha to seek therapy.

'You seek therapy and you're a big bad Alpha. Gemma said with a chuckle.

"That's different." I replied to Gemma without realizing I spoke out loud.

"How is another having feelings different from you having feelings?" Kennedy asked.

"It doesn't. I just mean, why would Ezra be hurting when he rejected me?"

"Have you ever sat back and looked at the position he may have been in at the time?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"From what you have told me, the curse didn't allow him to notice the Fated Mate bond. Right?"

"Right."

"And he hardly knew you, right?"

"But that was his choice." I tried defending.

"But he didn't know you, right?"

"Right." I replied defeated.

"And he was given an ultimatum to choose between his position as the King, something he had always been raised to be, over someone he didn't know or feel the real bond to. Right?"

Her words sink in, making me really think about everything. So many have said the same things and yet I chose to ignore them. Not once putting myself in his shoes. What would I have done? Would I have chosen someone I didn't feel a real bond to over my Kingdom?

'No.' Gemma answered my response in my mind.

"It sounds like you're taking his side." I said instead, choosing to be hard headed. I wasn't a red head for looks. I had the hardheadedness of one too.

"I am not on a side. I am simply just pointing out all I have heard from you so you can hear the words too. Sometimes hearing them instead of thinking them makes all the difference."

Yet somehow all of the others have yet to break into my thick skull with reasoning.

"How about let's discuss how you feel instead?" She said changing the subject.

My mind was still on the cold hard facts. I was being a bitch and holding a grudge instead of trying to put myself in his shoes. Ignoring literally everyone simply because I felt like I was justified in how I felt. Which, I was allowed to feel how I felt. But so was he. He had to choose between two things. He made his decision before truly knowing me. And since then, he has fought like hell with acts of kindness to win me back. All of which I ignored simply because I didn't want to forgive him.

"I feel sad." I finally said.

"Can you elaborate why?"

"Because I am a bitch and he deserves forgiveness, even if I am not ready to be his mate." I finally said the thoughts swirling in my mind.

"That's a good step. How about this week we work on giving him forgiveness to help you let go of that pain that holds you down." I shook my head agreeing. "Perfect. I would like to see you again tomorrow, we can then talk about this new member I hear is in the pack and what all happened back home."

"Sounds good. See you tomorrow Kennedy." I replied as I walked out.

We haven't discussed much but I felt relief, like a weight had been lifted off of my chest. And a new goal in mind.