Divorced, But Not Broken
Divorced, but Not broken Chapter 71

I showered. way longer than I needed and just stood there, I hated this. Me being here with Joseph that was hopefully still out there, and if he had left... well f**k him... I was walking out in my sweats and long shirt that covered me completely making a scowl that he "Why the f**k are you still here?!" I didn't know what I wanted when I showered but now that he was here it just made me mad. he had called me fat two times already and looked at my a*s, I hated him!

hadn't left, just sat there and was watching some shit about doctors that was talking on the screen not looking up when I got inside the room.

"What, you told me I was going to hang out and now you are kicking me out? You know that I can just as much delete you from getting inside here again..." He was frowning when I just shrugged, arms crossed, we'll let him. I was used to being shut out and he was the one that had to explain that to Jonah and not me.

"Do it." I made a dark menacing voice when he just raised his eyebrows like he wasn't expecting that answer from me, still glaring at him with my dark eyes, he wouldn't f*****g do it and we both knew that so why was he even trying to threaten me with that shit? He made a deep sigh like I was being impossible and just looked back at the screen again making me even madder, now he was ignoring me!? what the f**k was up with him, he was insane just like the rest of them, stupid and young, all of them!

My heart skipped a beat when there was a pounding on the door and suddenly all my anger was gone and I got scared, just staring at the door. who the hell was pounding on Jonah's door this time of night? It was almost midnight and the last time this happened, the guy on the other side was screaming and made me want to hide all over again.

Joseph got up and gave me a weird look like he didn't get me and walked over, and I was just about to tell him to stop, my fear pushing me hard when my shoulders were tense and my body ready to run. there could be anyone on the other side!? Austin being the first thought making me do a small whimper when he opened and I stared at the delivery guy that was looking bored, getting paid and leaved.

Oh my fucking God.

I was sweaty all over again when my body was still tense meeting the eyes of Joseph that was looking worried now, like he wasn't the biggest bitch you ever met and walked over with the containers and then over to me. still not moving from the spot that I was standing in when he opened the door and I looked up at his eyes that was concerned. he wasn't that much taller than me, just a few inches, not like Jonah, but who was taller than Jonah really?

"Okay, Andrea. deep breaths, deep breaths, you got this., that's all you need to do right now, just breathe." He sounded so nice when I realised that I was still holding my breath hard and just felt my shoulders starting to relax when he was holding on to them, staring me dead in the eye not looking away once when my ones were flacking from eye to eye on him.

"Fuck...." I was making small noises of distress when he just watched me and I didn't want him to see me like this, fucking pathetic and scared to death, but he was the one that was here and not Jonah... story of my life.... I gave into the tears when the hard knot in my chest was getting looser and I crashed into his shoulder with my head, not even caring if he wanted me to or not when my sobbing became harder. I just wanted Jonah to come back and not be out there and get hurt, I was still scared to death over him just as much as Austin coming back and finish what he started with me.

He didn't say a word, just let me cry into his shoulder and I don't even know how long time had passed when I finally looked up at him, all red and puffy from crying. I was scared to death half the time and angry the other one, Tom had been right, being with Jonah was hard and scary.

"Thanks...." I didn't say more when I pulled back and wiped the snot from my nose looking even more embarrassed at his t-shirt that was soaked, I didn't use to cry this much when I was with Ryan, just numb more like it then being this barrel of emotions that could explode any minute.

"You should tell him, that you are scared I mean." He just said that making me nod when I realised that I never had told Jonah, not straight up. that I was just that, scared of everything that had happened. Austin, Chris and the man pounding on the door, Jonah scared me too... f**k.... I looked away, I didn't want a f*****g awakening, I just wanted to eat and laugh at some dumb shit on the screen.

"Yeah...." I didn't say more when he gave me a look like he wasn't going to talk about it anymore and I glanced at the food, probably cold by the time I had been crying against him, f**k that was still embarrassing as hell.

I was wiping my eyes when he smiled the slightest and just walked over and snatched one of Jonah's shirts before taking off his own one when I started to giggle when it was too big on him and choked the slightest seeing that he was having a sixpack, wow, did not see that coming when he tucked the shirt into his pants smirking like he knew that I was staring again.

"Don't get your hopes up babe, I'm not into you or anyone else with tits." He just said that making me confused when he walked past me, taking the containers with him and putting them in the microwave when I followed him with my eyes and just looked more confused, what?!

"You're gay?!" I said it way to loud and shocked when he just smirked at me, wait what!? No! No! I had seen him with girls, like a lot of them..... But.... I was trying so hard to remember if he kissed them like the rest of them... I couldn't fucking remember to be honest since my focus always was on Jonah.

"Yes." He sounded serious all the sudden making me stunned, he was gay. Omg. Did Jonah know that, did Tom?! I was still gawking at him, like he was going to give up everything by just staring at him taking out the food and putting in the next one ignoring my failing attempt of mind reading.

"Eat." He put the hot container in my hand making me do a small curse when he just sat down again and put on the same show that was about doctors that was way too hot for reality when I spent enough time at the hospital to know that.

We ate in silence, and he didn't bring up being gay again and I didn't push him over it, maybe it was a secret, and he didn't want Jonah or Tom to know. I mean they were manwhores no doubt about that and they were young and didn't get it, I was not going to tell Jonah if he didn't want me too, it was not my thing to talk about.

"Hey, thanks for not going crazy when I told you..." he sounded grateful when I just smiled back, well I was old and all that, I got it... or... yeah.... I knew people had secrets they didn't want to share with others.

"Yeah.... Same..." I was hoping that he got it about me crying on him when he smirked, oh he got it.

He got up and left everything on the table, walking over and taking his coat and putting it on when I smiled at him, he was okay I guess for a bitch.

"See you." He just said that, and I made a chuckle, that was it? That was the way he was saying goodbye after telling me his secret and seeing mine? Well goodbye to him then.

"Yeah!" I started to laugh more when he smirked and I saw the door lock behind him, feeling a hundred times better than before, f**k him.