Silent Desires (Shattered Silence Duet Book 1)
Silent Desires: Chapter 12

Jasper and I hold each other’s gazes for a minute, him pleading with me to tell them the truth. If I am an obligation, he’s really taking all of this very seriously. Maybe there’s more to it than I think. Taking a deep breath, I pass my bottle to Mr. Hargrove before taking my notebook and pen and flipping to a new page as I consider what to write.

I write my questions and turn the book to Jasper, who reads it out loud. “Were you asked or told to escort me to my classes?”

“What?” Max asks from my other side. “Why would you think that?”

This time, I look at Mr. Hargrove and watch as recognition flashes in his eyes. “Ah, I did say I would have a student show you to your class, but I didn’t assign them to it, nor did I ask them to do it after the first day. That’s all them,” he says, motioning to the twins on either side of me.

I glance at Jasper as Max stands up and moves around me, so he’s sitting on the arm of Jasper’s chair, making it easier for me to see them both at the same time.

“Angel, we are hanging out with you because we like you,” Jasper says carefully.

I take my notebook back and write, before letting him read it out loud. “But you don’t even know me. Mina, we’re getting to know you. You’re sweet and kind and we enjoy your company. We’re trying to get to know you more, and the more we learn, the more we like.”

“Trust me,” Max jumps in, “if we didn’t like you, or didn’t want to hang out with you, we wouldn’t. You are our friend, and definitely not an obligation.”

My eyes dart back and forth between the two of them, trying to sense the truth. They seem like they are being honest. And if they do think of me as an obligation, why go through all of this effort to convince me otherwise? I have nothing to offer but my friendship. Deciding I’ve made a mistake in my judgement, I write, I’m sorry, and show it to the twins.

They both offer me smiles as Max swoops in first to hug me, lifting me right out of my chair. I wrap my arms around his neck, thankful my arm isn’t getting touched in our embrace, even though the position does put strain on it. As he sets me on my feet, I think I feel him brush his lips across the top of my head, but before I can question it, Jasper pulls me into a gentle hug.

When we finally pull apart, I smile at them both before Tucker’s voice penetrates my happy bubble. “I still want to know why you were sitting out in class yesterday, Sugar.” I look at him in surprise. I can’t tell him my arm was in too much pain, so I write the first thing I can think of. Cramps.

As he reads it, his expression softens. “Ah, alright then, as long as you’re okay?” I nod in answer. “Good. If you need to sit out the rest of the week, go ahead. You can stay on the bleachers like you did yesterday.” I give him a thankful smile, and just like that, the tension in the room evaporates.

Jasper and Tucker go to get us all food and I’m surprised that both Tucker and Mr. Hargrove spend the entire lunch hour with us. Don’t they have anything better to do? Max asks me about the songs I’ve been listening to, and I excitedly show him my lists.

We go through the songs and he tells me about them, and which ones he also likes. It turns out he likes everything but country. I like the country songs but I don’t like heavy metal or rap, though my favorite is pop. As the day continues, the tension in my body fades a bit and I start to feel more relaxed around them again.

The next day is the best one yet. I don’t even see my mother or Jeff, and I spend every moment I can with the twins. Max even brings me a special breakfast consisting of a cappuccino and a chocolate croissant. I love both of them and tell him they are my new favorites. The only down part of each day is when I have to go home. The twins keep asking if they can take me home or pick me up, but I deny them every time, knowing I can’t risk my mother seeing them or seeing me getting in or out of their truck.

I wish I could take them up on their offer though as the weather is starting to get colder, and I still don’t have a coat, sweater or tights to keep me warm.

But none of that is enough to stop me from looking forward to spending more time with my new friends. And when Friday morning rolls around, I replace myself with a mix of excitement for the day and sadness at being alone for the next two days.

I take a deep breath before stepping out of the bathroom, hoping to leave without incident this morning. Unfortunately, even if I think I’ve done everything perfectly, my mother will replace a reason to punish me if she wants to. I’ve been lucky this week, and she hasn’t been around when I‘ve left for school, making my mornings go without incident. However, she is not the only person to fear in this house, and she’s not the one waiting in the kitchen this morning, Jeff is.

As soon as he sees me, his eyes roam over my body, lingering on my school uniform blouse and kilt.“Come here, doll,” he says, crooking his finger at me. Tremors shoot up my legs and through my body as I wrap my arms around myself and move closer.

“You know these pigtails don’t hide your beauty at all. Your mother thinks they’ll make you look younger, but they just make you more enticing. Like a perfect little doll waiting to be played with.” I shiver as he gently tugs on one of my braids, and I pray he gets this over with quickly. He seems to like my reaction, though, adjusting himself in his pants. I try to step back, but he stops me by pulling on my braid, much harder this time, making me clench my jaw in pain.

“Don’t be like that, doll. Daddy just wants to play with his little girl.” Gross. I need to get out of here, fast. My eyes dart around, searching for a way out as I try to pull free from his grasp.

“Get on your knees.” My shocked eyes meet his greedy glare. He’s never made me do that before. I know what he wants me to do, and I can’t. I won’t. I’d rather take a beating. I tug at his hand more forcefully, but he just laughs and pulls me closer, wrapping his other arm around my back.

“I said… get on your knees,” he growls, baring his teeth. Warm tears stream down my face. I don’t think I can get out of this. I’m too small and too weak to get away.

“Oh yes, cry for me,” he whispers, leaning in to lick the tears from my face. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the image of him touching me, but it doesn’t work. Nausea rolls in my stomach as his tongue licks my cheek and I try to swallow down the bile that tries to rise in my throat.

He starts to push me to the ground when my mother’s voice rings out. “What the fuck is going on in here? Mina, get your hands off of him and get your worthless, fat ass to school before I show you what I really think of you.”

I’ve never been so happy to hear her voice in my life. The second Jeff lets go, I immediately bolt for the door. With my backpack still on, I grab my shoes and run barefoot out of the house as fast as I can.

When I reach the end of the street, I finally stop and sit by a short wooden fence. I pull my knees to my chest, wrap my arms around them, and let it all out. Sobs wrack my body, as it feels like my soul cracks even further.

What if Jeff tries that again, and she’s not there to stop it? Or worse, what if she sends him to me as punishment for something? I need to figure out how to get out of there. Now, more than ever. Maybe I should take my chances and run? I’d rather risk the cops torturing me than endure Jeff’s brand of torture. I can’t handle any more sexual assault. My broken soul is hanging on by threads.

These past two weeks, my new friends have unknowingly started piecing it back together, but when I’m not with them, I feel just as broken as before. Could I run away? Like, right now? My mother wouldn’t even start looking for me until after four, giving me all day to get as far as I can.

As the tears dry, I wipe my face and look around. That’s when I realize how cold it is. If I ran away today, I’d probably freeze to death or get sick. In just a skirt and blouse, with no food and no money, I don’t stand a chance.